Liya helped me to give in to my bitterness, and somehow it didn’t scare her away. She cried into my side when my tears slipped and held me tight. She laughed at the fun memories. She unlocked a chest of aggression and repressed emotions as we floated and crashed through all the hard-hitting truths.
One night didn’t free me from the guilt, but one night with Liya at my side as we navigated through the grief unleashed more than the last nineteen anniversaries combined.
It was midnight before she changed into shorts and a tank top. I stripped down to my boxers and we went to bed. Together. She pressed her cheek against my chest, her body soft against mine. I held her in my arms and played with her hair as she ran her nails gently over the scars.
“We’re finally going to sleep together?” she asked and yawned.
“Looks like it.”
“Best night of my life.” She kissed my chin.
I didn’t think that I could sleep, but Liya’s warmth lured me into dreams, not good, not bad, but the kind one doesn’t remember in the morning. For the first time in twenty anniversaries, nightmares didn’t plague me. When I woke up a few hours later, somewhat rested, relaxed, I knew that I could never let this woman go. She had become my remedy, my everything.
“Liya?” I muttered in her ear, then bit her earlobe when she didn’t stir. The woman could sleep.
“What?” she groaned.
“You hit your alarm three times.”
She stretched against me. “You know, there are better ways of waking me up if you’re going to be sleeping in my bed.”
“Next time, I promise, but don’t you have to get up for work?”
“Don’t you have to leave to get ready for work?” she muttered, and just like that, all the sarcasm returned.
I grazed her side, and she yelped. “Oh, are you ticklish?” I asked innocently.
She held my hands in place at her waist with a death grip. “Do. Not. Tickle. Me.”
“Then get up for work,” I teased.
“I’m not going to work,” she groaned.
“Are you going to call in?”
“Are you?”
“I only have some paperwork left that I can do from home.” I let out a rough sigh. I couldn’t believe I couldn’t help save this company. Granted, it wasn’t all my fault. Or even majority my fault. But it didn’t look good for me to have this loss following my career. And now Liya, among hundreds of others, would be out of a job.
“Oh. Screw work.” She closed her eyes and loosened her grip.
“That doesn’t sound like you.”
“The company’s closing. I’m supposed to be there when all those people get laid off, and they’ll know that I knew. I don’t want to. I don’t have to. I’m not going to be upper management’s little monkey who does the dirty work and gets the brunt of crap flung at me. And there will be a lot of crap flying. Let them deal with the mess they made.”
“Have you had any luck with finding another job?”
“I might have something lined up.”
“Well, that’s amazing and fast. Where?”
She rolled onto her back. “You’re awfully chatty at six in the morning.”
“Sorry, princess.”
“No one’s ever called me a princess. Does that make you a prince?”
“Only if you’re marrying me.”
She pried open one eye, and I expected her to crawl off the bed and take my joke the wrong way. Instead, she cracked a smile and stuck out her tongue.
“Don’t tease me, woman.”
“You always say that.” She winked.
“This time I’m half naked in your bed.” I pulled the covers down to reveal the tank top that had scrunched up over her stomach during all that tossing and turning, revealing the toned flesh of her abs and the hem of her shorts. “Nice.”
“Now who’s a tease?”
I pulled the covers back up and said, “Thank you for last night, for listening and helping me through everything.”
She gazed up at me, now fully awake. “Did it help any?”
“You lifted the weight. Not all of my guilt is gone, but my shoulders aren’t about to break from the burden.”
“It was my honor. Seriously. I’m glad that you could share it with me, that I helped. I’m not usually good in that department, sad things and kind encouragement and the sort.”
“You did really well.”
She smiled and slid a hand across my cheek just as I pulled back to lie down. Her hand accidentally trailed down my chest and stomach. I sucked in a breath and tightened my muscles beneath her palm. I froze. She froze.
Liya bit her lower lip and dragged her eyes down the length of my body.
Swallowing, she sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. “I’m going to make coffee if we’re going to keep this talking at six in the morning thing going.”
She piled her hair high on her head and stretched on her way across the room. Her shirt rode up and revealed a sliver of skin, and her shorts dropped an inch to reveal the curve of her narrow waist where it tapered out to generous hips, nice thighs, and a mighty fine butt.
Emotionally drained, I lay back, the silence interrupted by faint noises in the living room. Closing doors, running water, and the smell of coffee that accompanied Liya when she walked back in with two mugs. She placed them on the bedside table.
“You gonna get back into bed with me?” I asked, reaching for her hand.
She placed one knee on the mattress and watched me. “Are we going to be lazy bums?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know.” She tapped her jaw. “I don’t like lying around with a handsome man all day when I could be dealing with all the pissed-off people at my company.”
“Comparable, huh?” I grabbed her thigh and hoisted her onto me.
Liya yelped and laughed, falling on top of me, her body landing with a soft crash. “You’re going to pay for that!”
“Yeah? What are you going to do, princess?”
“Don’t call me that!” She giggled as she delicately punched my shoulder.
“It’s not nice to hit.” I tickled her sides, and she thrashed violently over me. “Damn, woman. Calm down.”
“Don’t tickle then,” she screamed around her laughter.
I flipped her over and landed on top of her, calming her outburst as she heaved beneath me.
“Don’t,” she pleaded.
“Don’t give mercy?”
“Don’t, Jay, please. I hate being tickled.”
“Like this? But you’re laughing. Laughing indicates enjoyment.” My fingers danced up her sides, beneath her shirt.
She bucked against me. “I’m going to end you!”
“I think you’re just going to laugh. Not very threatening.”
She scratched down my shoulders, and I hissed, grabbing her hands and trapping them above her head. I cocked an eyebrow.
“Don’t you have somewhere to go? Or a nephew to visit. Oh! Let’s go see Josh,” she suggested.
“You want to see him?”
“Of course I do. I miss him. He looks a little like you, you know?”