I like that he’s struggling, straining for control like I was under him. My tongue curls up his shaft until I suck the tip. When I lower again, he hisses my name. His nickname for me draws out like the buzzing sound the insect makes, and I’d laugh if I wasn’t concentrating. I want him to come. I want to feel the jolt and surprise, and the empowerment of making him unravel.
It doesn’t take long before he does what I desire, and I pull back, pleased with myself.
“You’ve got a satisfied look on your face,” he mocks, his voice rumpled sheets and morning-after sounding, and I smile at the sound of satisfaction in his voice. He tugs at his T-shirt to wipe himself off, and then pulls up his jeans but doesn’t close them. Instead, he reaches out an arm for me, and I tuck into his side. He grabs my coat and throws it over both of us. Pressing a kiss to my forehead, he moans.
“This is all I ever wanted.”
“What?” I chuckle, looking up at him.
“Land. Horses. A beautiful woman.”
I smile, nestling back into his chest. It’s a pleasant thought.
“Bee, I can’t go without you again.” He shifts so he can see me better. “No more running. I want you in bed. My bed. Your bed. Nothing needs to happen, but I need to hold you each night. I need to wake with you in my arms. It’s killing me that you’re downstairs, and I’m up. We need to rectify that.”
“Sleeping together?” My voice croaks.
“If sleeping is all I get, I want it. No more separation.”
“What about Hannah?”
“She’s a big girl, darlin’. She can handle it.”
I hope Jedd is right, but can I handle it? Snuggling back into his chest, I close my eyes a second and decide I can. This is all I ever wanted as well.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
[Beverly]
It’s been a few weeks, and Jedd’s been in my bed every night. We haven’t had sex, but we’ve done so much else. Mouths. Tongues. Fingers. Explore…and I’ve never felt so worshipped, so treasured. He holds to his promises, which include not taking me on the couch and not using certain words. The longer I’m with Jedd, though, the more I see it’s silly to put these parameters on him. He can be dirty with me in all kinds of ways, and my rocking chair has become a sacred piece of furniture.
Eventually, the winter market arrives, sporting seasonal roots and vegetables, holiday bakery items, and crafts. While I’m used to selling my tomatoes through the summer, I hibernate in the winter, hardly going to town. The community center is packed on this day, and I feel out of my element with my new hairstyle, fresh clothing, and different wares to sell.
“Mrs. Townsen,” Ashley Winston-Runous greets me, hardly batting an eye at the changes in me. I have continued to work at improving my strength, and it’s nice that someone isn’t staring at me as I limp along the table, stronger than I’ve been in the past. My daughter went to school with Roscoe Winston, Ashley’s younger brother, and Bethany, her mother, was a dear friend from the community. Ashley reaches for the green-tinted soap Naomi helped me make and lifts it to her nose. As she inhales, her eyes widen at the scent, and she smiles. “Bayberry.” She lowers the soap and inspects the packaging, reading the inscription aloud.
“Bee joyful.” She looks back at me, and her smile grows. “That’s rather inspiring for the season.”
My lip crooks, and my anxiety dissipates a little. Along with the letter B interwoven in the buzzing bee for a logo, Naomi encouraged me to include a play on the concept of the pollinator with each of the various fragrances.
Bee Joyful for bayberry pine.
Bee Courageous for citrus and floral.
Bee Inspired for lemon lavender.
Naomi also helped me copy the logo digitally and then cut the brown paper into strips for the wrapping. Coordinating twine holds the wrapper on the bar. Red and green. Orange and pink. Yellow and purple.
“Such pretty packaging,” the only Winston daughter comments. “I’ll take six Bee Joyful. One for each of my brothers.” She pauses a moment, mentally calculating. “And I need a Bee Inspired for Sienna because she loves lemon, plus a Bee Courageous for both Shelly and Jessica.” She stops again, running through her list. “Oh, almond and vanilla…Bee Fearless for Jenn and another for Simone.” Ashley chuckles to herself.
“I think I got everyone.” Then she sighs.
“And a Bee You for Claire.” This last one is honey and sunshine as Jedd calls it, but it’s mainly honey-scented soap with a hint of a secret ingredient. He tells me it smells like me, and it’s the only one without the bee symbol but rather a butterfly instead.
A butterfly is more fitting to describe you, Bee. You’re going through a metamorphosis, and you’re beautiful.
Gah, that man sometimes.
He isn’t here today, and neither is Hannah. I wanted to do this on my own. Naomi helped me with the display of things, arranging the soap as she has practice setting up books at the library. My sister and I have a newness to our relationship, and I’m appreciating the time we spend together, getting to know one another better. Her Nathan has helped her open up herself as well.
“Beverly,” a deep masculine voice addresses me after I hand off Ashley’s parcel filled with soaps. I’m still riding the high of my first sales when I look up to see Vernon before me. My heart hammers in my throat as I tersely greet him.
“Vernon.” I don’t have anything else to offer. The loss of his friendship still stings. Taking an obvious swallow, Vernon scans the stacks creatively displayed on my table.
“What’s this?” he asks, and I respond with the obvious.
“Soap.”
He picks one up, holding it under his nose and inhaling before his eyes leap up to mine. He pulls back the fragrant rectangle to read the inscription on the wrapper and a lump forms in my throat as I realize he’s holding a Bee You bar.
“Appropriate,” he mutters, and the lump thickens. He sets the bar back on the pyramid.
“How you liking the horses?” he asks.
“I don’t have much interaction with them, but I’m enjoying getting to know Hickory.” The blonde Quarter Horse filly, pretty and slick with a spirit all her own, was a pleasant surprise.
“You should really stay away from that one. She doesn’t want anyone on her back.” The hint includes a warning and innuendo, but the horse and I have the same relationship as Lucky One and me. She’s calm around me, or maybe I’m the one calmed by her presence. It’s strange to think such a large animal can be like therapy, but stroking their coats and rubbing their noses is exactly how I feel about such beasts, and it’s what Jedd wants to host with a few of his charges. He has a veteran friend coming to help him tend the stables.
“I warned Jedd about buying that one for you,” Vernon adds, and my head shoots up.
“Jedd bought her for me?” I sound like a parrot, repeating what Vernon has said, but I’m also surprised by the comment. Jedd hadn’t mentioned Hickory was mine. He just told me he bought her at auction. Untamed and wild, he thought she needed a good home.
Vernon’s brows pinch in confusion. “Maybe I have it wrong.”