I gaze up at the stars for a second. If he wasn’t absolutely fucking crazy, Andrew would fit in perfectly with lots of bikers I know.
When I don’t agree with him right away, he pokes me with the sticky end of his skewer. “Right, Chaser?”
I slap the hot metal away. “That sounded like a whole lot of words for, ‘I don’t know how to find a clit’ to me.”
“Nah,” Alvin chimes in. “Sounded more like, ‘I’ve never given a woman an orgasm.’”
“Fuck both of ya!” Andrew throws his arms open wide, accidentally flinging his marshmallows to the side. “Bring me a woman right now. Any woman. I’ll strum her clitty to orgasm in five seconds flat.”
Jacob points his bottle at Andrew. “Is Pammy a screamer? I feel like she’s a screamer.”
Andrew scratches his chin, settling in for what I’m sure will be a lengthy story about Pamela’s octave range.
Before he opens his mouth, I remind Jacob, “You were supposed to keep the partying to a minimum this weekend.”
“Chill the fuck out, Chaser,” Garrett slurs. “You’re not the boss of us.”
Since he’s regressed to the same arguments an eight-year-old would use, it’s a safe bet Garrett’s already killed a bottle on his own.
“Every rock star knows true binge-drinking is an artform.” Jacob flaps his arms in the air, leaning too close to the edge of the building for my comfort. “And I am motherfucking Michelangelo!”
“Preach, brotha!” Andrew reaches up to high-five Jacob, sending him teetering closer to the edge.
This is fucking ridiculous. I elbow Andrew out of the way.
“That’s great.” I loop my arm around Jacob’s waist and drag him off the ledge. “Let’s go downstairs. The hotel’s ready to throw us out.”
“No!” Jacob protests. “We’re having fun.”
“I think you’ve had enough fun.”
“I won’t let them throw you out, Chaser,” Andrew pleads. “Don’t go.”
“Bro, we have two more shows to get through,” I remind him.
Jacob tips his bottle back, drains the contents, and tosses it against the brick wall, where it shatters. “Need to find another one.”
“I bet Robbie has a fresh bottle waiting for you in your room.”
He stares at me with glassy eyes then scowls past me at Robbie. “Nu-uh, Val told him to keep me away from booze.” Jacob’s mouth pulls into a goofy grin, and he points at Andrew. “But Andrew hooked us up!”
Andrew pinches his fingers together. “He may have had a little bit of coke too.”
“That’s great. Very helpful. Thanks, Andrew.”
“We were celebrating your awesome show tonight.”
“I got you covered, Jacob,” Robbie says. “Come on back downstairs.”
Hopefully, Jacob passes out; otherwise, I’m prepared to knock him out.
The next afternoon, Mallory and I are headed back to our room after finishing lunch with Audrey and Doug when Jacob finally makes an appearance.
“Are you all right, Jacob?” Mallory asks.
He peers at her over his sunglasses. “Where’s the coffee?”
“We’ll have some sent up,” Mallory promises. “You don’t look too good.”
“You’re looking foxy, Mallory.” He grins at her.
“Still high, bro?” I ask.
“Come on,” Mallory steers him into our room and goes over to the phone to order room service.
“What the fuck, Jacob?” I look him up and down. “We have to be on stage in a couple of hours and you smell like warmed-over death.”
“We might have to cancel.”
I stand there and absorb the shock of his suggestion. We’ve never canceled a show. No matter how shitfaced we’ve been in the past, we always pulled ourselves together so that our shows never suffered.
“Jacob, last night was one of our best and biggest performances, and you want to blow off tonight’s show?” He has to be out of his damn mind.
“It fucking sucked and you know it,” he rasps.
“What?”
“Dude, I choked. I was awkward and could barely get any words out. I know you noticed.”
“We were all a little nervous, Jacob. My first solo wasn’t great. But come on, think of the reaction we got for ‘Queen of the Road.’ How many times have we seen a band perform a new song just to have the crowd stand around and scratch their heads?”
He flashes a hint of a smile. “That’s true.”
I glance up, and Mallory flashes ten fingers at me, then points to the door.
“Coffee’s on its way.”
Jacob brushes his fingers against his throat. “I don’t know how much longer this can last.”
“What are you talking about?”
He tilts his head, watching me from the corner of his eye. “I’m not like you. My daddy didn’t send me to professional lessons. I’ve been opening my mouth and screaming since the beginning.”
Half-truth, but now isn’t the time to call him out. His parents sent him for lessons, then declared he wasn’t good enough and stopped paying for them. It’s how he learned the same vocal warm-ups he still uses today. “Use some of the money we’re making to take the lessons now.”
“I can’t change my signature style. It’s gotten us this far.”
“You can change if you think it will save your voice.” I bite the inside of my cheek, debating my next words. “The coke and alcohol don’t help.”
“Give me a break. That’s got nothing to do with my voice.”
How deep his denial runs.
“Like fuck it doesn’t.” I gesture toward the door. “You ran up and down the hallway screaming at the top of your lungs last night. That can’t be good for your vocal cords.”
He scratches the side of his head. “No, I didn’t.”
“Yeah. You did. I found you up on the roof. We had to drag you downstairs kicking and screaming. Robbie tied you to the bed, so you wouldn’t get loose again.”
Instead of, oh, I don’t know, being fucking horrified, he doubles over laughing. “Oh, fuck. That’s some funny shit. I thought I hooked up with some kinky chick, but it was Robbie.”
“It wasn’t funny at all, dude. The hotel was going to kick all of us out.”
Jacob finally pulls himself together about an hour before we go on stage. And by pull together, I mean, has dropped the pity party and graduated to pissing me off.
“Who’s the old dude? That Mallory’s dad?” Jacob lifts his chin in Audrey and Doug’s direction. “You trying to set him up with Audrey?”
“Knock it off. That’s Audrey’s boyfriend. He’s a nice guy.” Square and out of place at a rock concert, sure. That doesn’t mean I want anyone to hassle him.
“Her boyfriend? Does he know?” Jacob wiggles his eyebrows like a jackass.
“I don’t know, so keep your mouth shut and don’t be a dick.”
“Whatever.” He shrugs. “Good for her. It’s a lot more respectable to straight up fuck for money than fuck with a bunch of hidden expectations.” He aims a glare down the hallway. I follow his line of sight to Holly.