Dozens of different machines squawking in unison surrounded the bed. The room reminded me of a scene from a futuristic science fiction movie.
“Brooklyn will get a nurse,” he said, his fingers moving against mine subtly and carefully.
“I don’t want some random woman to bathe you.”
He smiled again, but his face twisted and I realized he couldn’t laugh, because he was in pain.
“Remember what you said to me in Aspen, Frank?”
“A lot of dirty things, as you requested.”
“That too,” I agreed. “You said you’ve never been in a relationship with someone who wasn’t a high profile person.”
He nodded.
“This is what a relationship with a middle-class woman is like. She’s not going to hide out from the press while her man is going through shit.”
“Nicely put. Going through shit. And I like that. Well, not that going through shit part, but how vocal you are about your dibs on me.”
We stared at each other for a few seconds. “You need to let me be there for you, Frank,” I said, our fingers still entwined.
“And you need to let me protect you from the shit I’m in.”
“Are we talking compromise here?”
“Yes. It appears we are.” The corner of his mouth tugged, but his voice was barely there.
“How are we doing this then?”
“First of all, you need to go home and get some sleep. The hospital will be surrounded by reporters while I’m here. I don’t want you to come back. It’s too risky. Just lay low.”
My heart drummed in my chest as I held his hand and listened. He sounded like an undercover agent who was trying to get us out of a life and death situation.
“When will you be released?”
“A couple of days…hopefully.” His jaw slackened. He was slipping away.
“Okay, then I’ll see you at home?” It was half-statement, half-question.
“Yes, I’ll see you at home, doll.”
Exhausted, I slid into the back of the car Corey had arranged for me. My entire body felt as if it were falling apart. Worry swelled in my chest as I rattled off my Burbank address to the driver. We pulled out from the rear parking lot and rounded the building. A large group of fans in Hall Affinity T-shirts and reporters with cameras crowded the entrance. I noticed a news van across the street.
Frankie Blade continued to make headlines. Even from the hospital.
I wanted to check on Ashton and grab a few things before returning to Malibu. My brother had been texting me all night, asking about Frank. There were a couple of messages from Levi and one from my mother. She’d read about the incident on Facebook.
And then there was everyone else. Thirty-five new emails in my personal inbox and another sixty-three in my Rewired folder. I drew a tired breath through my teeth and looked at the Twitter feed. It was becoming too much. The tabloids, the people, the messages waiting to be answered. My head was a raging volcano, ready to burst any second from the overload of information.
The car merged with the morning traffic and continued its drive through the streets of L.A.
Drained, I shut off my phone and closed my eyes. My body went lax against the crisp leather of the back seat. The engine’s hum lulled me to sleep. I passed out almost instantly and didn’t wake up until the car came to a stop outside my apartment complex in Burbank.
Chapter Three
Levi’s shadowed eyes stalled on my face. “Come again?” His brows pulled together. The thrumming vein on his neck told me he was in panic mode.
“It’s for the best.” Anxiety coursed through me as I spoke.
“Tell me this is a fucking joke, Cass.”
“It’s not a joke.”
We were in Levi’s living room. He was sprawled out on the couch across from me, his laptop and a large box of pizza sitting in front of him.
I occupied the chair. My heart pounded like a hammer. Everything had been falling apart. I felt it. He felt it too. We simply didn't have the courage to begin this conversation.
Frank’s accident was the final straw.
Gotta get your priorities straight, Cass, my gut kept whispering. Now is the time.
“I’m still going to cover all the events I’ve already committed to. Stewie can help you with the rest.” I tried to soften the blow, but my argument seemed weak.
Levi looked like he’d been hit by a truck, and I, Cassy Evans, was the damn truck.
I’d just told him I wanted a break from Rewired.
“Are you still pissed at me for not censoring Shayne’s review? Is that what this is?” He leaned forward, his Red Bull hitting the coffee table between us.
“No. It’s just become too much. The magazine and the documentary…” And Frank.
The silence between Levi and me dragged on. His foot was bouncing. He rested his elbows on his knees and absently stared at the slices of pizza inside the box.
“You knew when we jumped into this how much work the film was going to be. I can’t keep doing both,” I said. “It’s wearing me down.”
“Don’t lie to me, Cass. It’s because of him, isn’t it?”
“It’s not only him.” I shook my head. “But I can’t be in three different places at once. I’m exhausted.”
Levi was right. Frank was one of several reasons why I needed to give something up. He was still a hot mess after the surgery and Rewired ate up all my time.
“I need us to see it through, Cass,” Levi argued, his gaze focused on a stray pepperoni. “For Isabella.”
“We will. I promise. That’s why I want to dedicate more time to the project.”
“The odds aren’t in our favor.”
I knew exactly what he meant by that. Frank's involvement was now up in the air. Frank's career was up in the air.
He'd been released from the hospital two days ago into an immediate madness of countless meetings with the lawyers and a disaster in the press. Mind dulled by the physical pain and the pills fighting it, he hadn’t been able to produce a single coherent sentence.
My thoughts spun. I didn’t know how to explain to Levi what was going on in my life right now without jeopardizing Frank’s privacy. I didn’t know how to tell him I hadn’t been able to sleep at all since the accident. Instead, I’d tossed and turned in the huge empty bed in my lover’s Malibu mansion, hugging the sheets that still smelled of him, wearing his shirt, pretending he lay near, pretending he was still his charming, sexy self, pretending his name hadn’t been dirty-laundered online, pretending he hadn’t been severely medicated in the hospital.
“I know,” I said softly. “And trust me, I hate this as much as you do. I’ve given everything I have to this magazine, but I can’t split myself apart. I need to take a step back.”
We sat in silence for a little longer. My chest was heavy and stiff, and I felt the pain of the entire world gathering within me.
“You think I’m a traitor and a coward, huh?” I swallowed past the lump in my throat.
“I don’t think you’re a coward,” he corrected me. “I think you’re stupid, Cass. We’re on a fucking roll.” They were mean words, but there was no cruelty in his voice. He sounded more disappointed.