He kissed her like he was dying, like she could bring him back to life. Wishing that were true, but knowing his life would never be the same, he backed away and stepped to the side without warning.
“Goodbye, Sarafina.”
She didn’t respond.
Within seconds, she was out of his life—again.
Sarafina tossed her keys on the kitchen counter, then pulled out a wine glass and a bottle of red Merlot.
It was only ten o’clock in the morning, but that thought had no bearing on her mind as she filled her glass to the top. Anything to dull the pain. Anything to make her forget how foolish she had been.
Not only had she fallen for a man so easily—even letting him into her bed only knowing him one night—but she also had grandeur fantasies that he would change his mind and be knocking on her door before the day was over. How silly those fantasies had been.
He never had any intention of remaining in her life. She had been a means to an end. An extractor of information. Waking up in the morning, alone, half her bed cold to the touch, her mind still said he could come back. Well, there was no coming back after what she learned.
Walking aimlessly around the city the entire morning did nothing to clear her mind or change the facts of what happened.
FBI. A liar from the start.
Why had she fallen so easily into his arms? Why had he made it so easy? And why did he set his sights on her, like she would have the information he needed? She would’ve been the last person on earth to have any information on Mr. C’s so-called operation. Because, no matter what it looked like, she had a hard time believing Mr. C and Travis were involved in any illegal activities. Franklin, now, she had no problem imagining him involved in anything illegal. He was a dirtbag through and through.
Slumping down into one of the dining room chairs, she took a huge gulp of wine as she rolled around the night of the wedding in her mind.
Walking down the aisle with Dax, sensing the tension between him and Ryan.
Of course, that made sense now. Ryan knew what was going on with Dax and he hadn’t liked it one bit. And why would he? He loved Lily. He would never want anything to ruin the big day. So, why had he agreed? They must not have given him a choice. Or more like, Dax hadn’t.
Lora had attached herself to Dax like a leech. He had eagerly soaked up the attention. She was the daughter of Martin Chilani. What better way to get information than falling into the arms of one of his daughters. Except she ruined his plans rather quickly when she averted her attention elsewhere. Why? Because her father didn’t trust him.
Sarafina laughed. Mr. C had great intuition because Dax couldn’t be trusted.
And her least favorite part of the night. When he extracted the information he needed from her. How stupid could she be?
Was she really that stupid? He made one point very clear, and it was all true. He avoided her most of the evening. She danced, laughed, and talked merrily with a slew of people while he did the same from across the room. He hadn’t made a point to seek her out, to dance with her, to even have a simple word with her once the reception officially started.
No. She only started talking to him and dancing such a sweet dance when Lily dragged her over to his table.
Did that really say he tried using her?
No.
Did he purposely try to get any information from her?
No. She made all of that quite easy for him. She brought up the part about Lora. She mentioned the conversation she overheard without hesitation. He may have coaxed her, knowing he could use the information, but she had given him the inkling there was something there.
As much as she wanted to hate him and blame him for everything, she couldn’t. Part of the blame lay on her.
So, why did he take her home and give her the most amazing night she ever experienced? There was no need to play with her emotions. That was the reason she wanted to hate him.
I don’t want to want you. But I can’t help myself. Please, whatever happens in the future, know that what’s about to happen tonight is because I care for you.
The wine glass slipped through her fingers, crashing ceremoniously to the floor. The red liquid drained into the hard wooden floor, speckles of glass shattered around. Yet, nothing penetrated through the thick fog of his words.
A shaky hand covered her mouth as tears fell.
I’m risking it all to have this one night.
He did risk it all, didn’t he? An FBI agent undercover—to what they believed a dangerous man—and he risked his job, his cover to have one night with her.
He tried to tell her it was wrong, that she should forget about him, but she refused to listen. The attraction between them had been so strong she refused to contemplate what he was trying to say.
As the sobs tore from her body, she couldn’t regret any moment they shared. Well, one regret. She would never have a chance with him. Such potential happiness ripped away from her without a beginning in sight.
The tears rained down her face like a waterfall, beating her into defeat. They soaked her to the bone, stripping her emotions bare.
Was Dax the one? Could the one man she had been waiting for to walk into her life, walk right back out without stopping?
Perhaps. She wasn’t completely sure. What she did know was that he was special, kind, considerate, humorous, and so many other wonderful qualities that were marked on her list. Only one night and she could confirm that.
And good in bed. He topped that better than any other man. Scorched her body to the bone. Desire tingled in her veins, right then, to have him.
Wiping her face even as the tears continued to fall, she looked down at the floor to the mess she had created. Another mess in her life that she would clean up and move on from. He gave her one glorious night. Locking those memories into the deep recess of her mind was all she could do now.
Standing up and mucking her way through the mess on the floor, she decided that’s all she had to do with life. Just muck her way through. These feelings were temporary. In a few days, it wouldn’t feel like her heart had been ripped out and trampled to pieces. She would feel like a whole new person. Because that’s what she did. Moved on after a guy tore her up.
She cleaned up the mess, took a shower to clear her head and the memory of Dax, which seemed impossible, and curled into bed. The sound of pounding woke her up, making her realize she had slept all day.
Dragging herself from the bed, she grabbed her robe hanging from the wall near her closet and opened the front door to an irate Travis.
“What took you so long to answer the door? You weren’t answering your phone,” he asked, annoyed, shutting the door for her as he took in the state of her appearance. “Are you okay, Fina? You don’t look well. You have no idea the worry you put me in.”
“I was sleeping. The events of the day made me tired.” Walking away, she knew he would follow her into the kitchen. Jeepers, he had walked into her house without her blessing. Just took charge. That was Travis.
“I’m sorry. You had me worried when you didn’t answer. It’s nearly five o’clock. Why were you sleeping?”
She grabbed a water bottle from the fridge, offering him one. Declining, he leaned against the counter and waited for her to finish taking a drink.
“I didn’t mean to worry you, Travis. I guess I was sleeping so hard that I didn’t hear my phone. I truly didn’t mean to worry you. How are you?”