“Huh.” He sits back, the blanket over his waist leaving his spectacular chest exposed. Not helping, Ryan. “So, you’re good with me kissing you whenever I want?” He throws me an eyebrow like he’s daring me to argue with what feels like the formation of a new plan. “But, I can’t touch your sensitive, absolutely gorgeous tits.” I don’t comment on that. “And you’re not ready for sex…yet.” I get another eyebrow, and I bite my lip to hide my smile. “Or a relationship. Did I get the gist of what you’re trying to tell me?”
I nod my head, still biting my lip, suddenly feeling a little exposed and nervous.
I have no idea what I’m proposing between us, but it changes everything. How will that impact the next two weeks? I don’t want a relationship, but if he’s talking about kissing me whenever he wants, what the hell are we then?
Friends who kiss?
Yeah, that one always works out well.
But I don’t want a relationship. I don’t. I still feel married and taken, and suddenly, I feel like I’m cheating on Eric.
“Katie, stop. I see your wheels spinning and they don’t need to.” My eyes widen at him because I’m shocked he can read me so well. “All right, I’m going to be honest with you, since you’re being so honest with me.”
“Okay.”
He shifts his position, reaching out for my hips and pulling me closer to his side. His fingers run through my messy wavy locks and he smiles deeply.
“I like you. A lot. I think you’re incredible, and I really like kissing you. Do I want more than kissing with you? Of course, I do. Badly, in fact, but I would never do something with you that you’re not ready for. So if all you’re offering me right now is kissing with the eventual possibility of more, then I’m good with that,” he smiles, leaning down to brush his lips against mine as if to prove his point before pulling back. “I’m great with it actually.”
“And you’re fine with not being in a relationship or anything like that?” I realize he’s a guy and that is probably not an issue for him, but I need to make sure.
He looks pensive for a moment and then nods. “Yeah. I’m okay with that. I just want to enjoy the last two weeks of this journey with you and all that it entails.”
“Wow.”
I don’t really know what else to say.
Not many men would willingly enter into a PG non-relationship with a woman without at least the promise of sex. Maybe he thinks that’s eventually where this is headed, and it could be, but I just don’t know.
I honestly don’t, so I won’t tell him yes or no either way.
“Now. I’d like to kiss the hell out of you for a bit longer until I can’t take it anymore, and then I’d like to go for a hike through the Grand Canyon before we head to Vegas.”
“I’m liking all of those things,” I smile at his playful expression. He seems so much lighter today than he has the past few days.
“Good. Now get your sexy ass over here.” He picks me up, settling me on his thighs, before lying back and bringing me up so that I’m straddling his stomach. “You’re so small, Katie. In this situation, it’s a good thing. I think if you were pressed against me a little lower, this would never work.”
I laugh, leaning down to kiss him. “Agreed.”
We kiss and touch safe areas, looking and smiling at each other a lot, until Ryan suddenly tosses me off him and onto the bed and announces that he needs to go take a shower immediately.
I get it. Actually, I see it as he walks by me.
“Don’t look at me like that, Katie. You’re killing me, and I’m trying so hard to be good,” he says with a smile as he stands at the foot of the bed.
I’m biting my lip, trying to hide my smile. “Yes, you certainly are trying hard to be good.”
He groans, dropping his head back and stalks heavily towards the bathroom. “I’m going to get you back for that.”
“Promise?” I call out, and he groans again as he slams the door behind him, making me laugh.
The sound of the water running through the pipes fills the room as he starts the shower, and I get up and walk toward the window. It is a beautiful day. Bright and sunny.
After he comes out of the shower, wrapped in another freaking towel, I go into the bathroom and get changed, but I don’t shower. No point since we’re planning on hiking.
“Ready?” he asks when I walk out in running shorts, a sports bra, and tank top.
“Ready.”
He smiles, walks to me, and kisses me like crazy until we’re both breathless. “Now we’re ready.”
“Maybe all this kissing is a bad idea,” I jest.
He takes my hand and leads me out of the room toward the lobby. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that. Kissing is a perfect idea. Definitely one of the better ones I’ve had,” he winks down at me, and I can only shake my head at him.
He is too freaking cute when he’s playful like this.
The Grand Canyon is everything I always thought it would be and more. Incredible and picturesque and phenomenal. Jagged cliffs, red earth, and the river cutting through the canyon.
We hike one of the many trails—which is actually pretty challenging—for a couple of hours.
By the time we are finished, we’re both covered in sweat and sunscreen and dirt, but it was worth it. We both took a million pictures along the way, but at the top, with the canyon vast and glorious behind us, we take a selfie together.
Then Ryan kisses me hard, and takes more of us like that.
When he pulls away, he is smiling so big, it’s infectious, and I’m smiling too, and I feel…happy.
I feel fucking happy, and then that turns to guilt, and the vicious cycle begins all over again. I do my best to push it down and just be in the moment with Ryan. Eventually, that wins out.
We load our stuff into the car for the short trip over to Vegas. Neither one of us has bought a whole lot along the way, so it’s still just our suitcases and my boxes that I have left untouched. Once we hit the highway, Ryan is introspective again.
“Everything good?” I ask, turning in my seat to face him since he’s driving.
“Yes, I was just thinking.”
“About?” I prompt.
“You and me.” This makes me a little nervous. “I’m thinking that we should share a room from now on. No more two rooms.” He looks over at me quickly to try and gauge my reaction before turning back to the road.
“I don’t know, Ryan. I mean, us sharing a room for the next two weeks is sort of relationship-y.”
“You know that’s not a word, right?”
I roll my eyes. “Yes, Professor, I’m fully aware. But it is, don’t you think?”
“Not really, no. I think it’s cost-effective and smart.” He’s giving me his crooked grin again, and it’s hard to say no to him when he does that.
“One bed or two?”
“One. I liked waking up with you wrapped around me this morning.”
“And this still stays within the realm of no sex and no relationship?” I ask dubiously. That just doesn’t seem right.
“Sure,” he shrugs like it’s not the big deal I’m making it out to be.