Tonight I’m going to turn into the seductive woman that is supposed to be hiding beneath my usual yoga pants and t-shirts.
“You look gorgeous, Bailey,” Erin purrs in my ear, her eyes meeting mine in the mirror. Erin is a natural beauty with red hair and big blue eyes. Where I have curves, she is skinny. I’m jealous of her body, and in turn, she always claims to be jealous of mine.
“This isn’t going to work,” I huff, putting the lip gloss on the marble vanity. “He only sees me as a friend. It’s been this way for years. I don’t think a little makeup, some curls, and a tight ass dress is going to change that.”
My confidence is already lacking. I know I’m pretty, but I’m not the kind of girl he sleeps with and that kind of worries me. Maybe I’m not his type. I almost laugh. Who am I kidding, anything with a vagina is his type.
Erin grabs me by the cheeks and turns me so I’m facing her. We’re both about the same height, but in the heels she’s wearing, she’s gained about three inches on me.
“It’s all part of the package. First we draw him in, get his attention, make him see you all over again. Then you tease him, flirt with him a little bit.”
“It’s like you don’t know me at all.” I roll my eyes. “I don’t flirt, Erin.”
“Well, you do tonight, so shut up and let me finish,” she states matter-of-factly, flashing me a grin. “You flirt, get some liquid courage, tease him a little, and then you kiss him. Give him a little taste. Tell him you want him.”
“That’s the secret?” I ask with a thick brow lifted.
Grinning, she says, “Of course that’s the secret. As soon as he knows you want him, he’ll cave. Thus far, you’ve never crossed the line. Tonight, you will. Tonight, he’ll see you want more than friendship. That stupid promise you made him make all those years ago won’t mean shit. He’s a man, he gets more pussy than a toilet seat, but he’s never had your pussy, and that’s all that matters.”
I blink slowly, digesting what she said. I don’t really believe her. Not completely. Elijah often went for the things that he knew he couldn’t have. Like any man, he loves a good challenge, but I don’t want to be a challenge. I simply want him. I don’t want to be a conquest. I want to drop my V-card and move on with my life. Maybe I’m stupid for wanting Elijah to be the man to take that one single thing... I don’t know. All I know is that I crave him. My fingers burned to touch his skin. My lips puckered to kiss his.
Every time I think about having sex with someone else, all I can think of is him. I had plenty of opportunities to lose my virginity, but I never went through with it and that’s all because for some stupid reason, I can’t imagine doing it with anybody besides him.
Releasing me, Erin smooths a hand over my chestnut brown hair and untangles a few of the curls that cling together on my shoulders. Things are about to get complicated, very complicated, and yet, I’ve never been more excited.
I don’t want to ruin my friendship with Elijah, but I’m tired of being hung up on him. I just need to lose my virginity to him so I can finally move on.
He doesn’t do relationships. I know this, as does every other woman in Chicago, but that doesn’t change the fact that I want him to be my first. I promised myself years ago that he would be the one to do it and for some stupid reason, I can’t let go of that thought.
At first it was just a childish choice, something I decided when I found out all my friends were having sex. But then something changed… our friendship changed. Elijah changed. He looked at me differently, he treated me differently and as we got older, I told myself if I was going to give myself to anyone. it was going to be to the one boy, now a man, that I had known my entire life.
And so the stupid promise to myself stuck. Which leads me to tonight. I tell myself that I’ll just do this and then I can get over being a virgin. Then I can find someone who actually wants a relationship, someone that might actually love me. Someone I can be happy with, get married to, and eventually start a family with.
I pretend that I don’t care that he’s a manwhore, that has a mean streak and is notorious for leaving women the morning after. It’s easier if I don’t think about it. Because in my eyes I’ll never just be the morning after girl, the walk of shame one. Unlike the girls he meets and takes home to screw, I know him. I know him unlike anyone else.
He’s my best friend, my protector, my partner and crime. He was there for me when I lost my mother, he was my first kiss, and now he will be the man to take my virginity.
If anyone is going to claim me, it’s going to be him. I know it, and I’m sure some part of him knows it too. My gaze moves down the tight little red number that Erin made me put on. It clings to me like a second skin, showing off my curves and a good bit of cleavage. Oh god. This is a bad idea. A very wicked, most likely going to work, bad idea.
“What about our friendship?” I blurt out as Erin finishes doing her own makeup. Nervous knots start to form deep in my gut. I’m going to need a drink before we even make it to the club at this rate.
Erin shrugs. “I guess we’ll see where tonight leads. Friends with benefits? Lovers?” She smacks her lips together. “It’s not like you guys could ever stop being friends. The man can’t even go a day without talking to you.”
She’s right, but sex changes things. I know that and I haven’t even done it yet. Emotions get involved, and then people get hurt. This is exactly the reason we need to keep feelings out of it and concentrate on the sex and nothing else. It shouldn’t be that hard, right? Holy hell, I was already second guessing myself. God, this was a bad idea. What if I liked sex with him? What if he proved to be everything I expected and more?
“Maybe I shouldn’t do this…” I tug at the hem of the dress. Suddenly the thing feels too short. I’m out of my element here and if I can see that, then he will too.
Erin turns away from the mirror and stares me straight in the eyes. Aside from Elijah, she’s one of the only other people that know me, really know me. Nothing but excitement and joy reflect back at me as I stare at her.
“Tonight, you’re making Mr. Westbrook realize what he’s been missing. You’re going to walk into that club, shake your ass, drink some drinks, and tease the fuck out of that bastard. Then you’re going to tell him to take you back to his place and fuck you. In the morning, you can figure out what happens next, but right now, you need to live for the moment. Don’t think about the consequences, Bailey. Think about the goal, about his cock entering you, about the toe-curling orgasm he’ll give you.”
I grin, and so does Erin. “You’re a bad influence,” I mumble, shaking my head before exiting the bathroom. Gathering up my wallet and cell phone, I slip into a pair of heels.
“And you’re not, and that’s why you need me,” Erin hollers after me. I exhale deeply, my lungs constrict and my heartbeat pounds in my ears.
You can do this, Bailey.
All I’ve got to do is push away the fact that he is a notorious player and my best friend. All I have to do is see him for the sweet-hearted guy who kissed my booboos as kids and beat the crap out of guys who got too touchy-feely at prom. All I have to do is pretend this is a one-night stand and not the biggest complication of my life.