“It is,” he said, striding over. “How’d you know?”
“Lucky guess.” I watched him approach the chain-link fence.
“You’re up early,” he said. “Feeling better?”
“I feel great. Stir-crazy but great. And I’ve never seen you out of uniform in real life. You look so different. I’d never have known…”
That you were all this, Jimmy.
“I guess that’s the point of the uniform,” he said. “Keeps the focus on the work.”
I nodded. “Delia put me in a uniform too. All those boring clothes. This is the real me.” I coughed, suddenly shy again, the way only Jimmy could make me.
I expected his eyes to rake me up and down—I wanted them to. The desire to feel desirable to him came over me again like it had in the mall. To be pretty for him. But his dark brown eyes never left my face. They held mine with an intensity that stole my breath.
“I like the real you, Thea,” he said. “I always have. Doesn’t matter what you’re wearing.”
My fingers on the chain-link squeezed as another flush of heat swept through me.
“You keep saying things like that, Jimmy and I’ll…” I sighed. “Nothing, actually. I can’t do anything from behind this fence. Quite the metaphor.”
I gave the fence a shake. It rattled, and Jimmy flinched from the sound.
“Oh, I’m sorry—”
“It’s n-n-nothing,” he said. “Bad memories. I got thrown against a lot of chain-link fences in high school. The sound of it stuck with me, I guess.”
“Then I hate this fence even more,” I said, wanting to touch him softly. To soothe away the hard memories. “I hate that I’m on this side and you’re on that side. You’re free and I’m trapped in here. I’m awake and alive and in the exact same place I’ve been for two years.”
“I know,” he said.
“Well?”
He glanced around. “Watch out,” he said, then tossed his motorcycle helmet over to my side. It landed a few feet from me. Jimmy scaled the eight-foot fence, kicked his boots on the top, then dropped easily down on my side. I could smell his cologne and the leather of his jacket
“Better?” he asked.
“Not really. I’d rather you’d have lowered a rope made out of sheets tied together and hauled me out on that side. Neither of us belongs here.”
He squinted, his gaze taking in the grounds and the sunlight spilling over the grass.
“I’m late for work.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “You want to go for a walk later?”
I cocked my head. “Is that the Blue Ridge Sanitarium version of a date?”
Unfazed, he shook his head. “Dating isn’t allowed.”
“Do you always play by the rules?”
His mouth was grim. “When your safety is on the line? Yeah, I do.”
“What does my safety have to do with you and me on a date?” I gave him a flirty smile. “Are you dangerous?”
I already knew the answer to that. To anyone who would hurt me, Jimmy was dangerous. But not to me. Never to me.
“They want to keep an eye on you a little longer.”
My smile collapsed. “And I should be reasonable and just go along with it, but I feel like I’m squandering this gift I’ve been given every second I’m in here.”
“I know, but it was hard for us too,” he said. “Hard for Delia, I mean. Seeing you trapped in that five-minute loop. The absence seizures.”
“But everything’s different now. I’m here. I’m awake.”
He looked about to say something, then changed his mind.
“She got to you, didn’t she?” I asked. “What did she say?”
“She told me I shouldn’t take advantage of you. And she’s right. It’s not professional. It’s…”
“Wrong? Because I’m a mental patient who can’t make decisions for herself? And let me guess, she threatened to have you fired.”
He nodded.
The fight started to ebb out of me. “Honestly, part of me wants you to get fired. So you’ll go back to school and follow your dreams. You’re not trapped here, Jimmy. You can leave at any time.”
He shook his head. “Someone has to watch out for you.”
Another flush of warmth surged through me. “I don’t need protection anymore.”
“I know,” he said. “But for so long it’s what I’ve been d-d-doing…” He broke off, carved his hand through his hair and took a step away from me. “Goddamn, this f-f-fucking stutter…”
I pulled him back to me. “You only stutter when something is important to you.”
Jimmy nodded, his brown eyes darkening. “You’re important to me.”
He stepped closer and I felt the pull between us, inevitable and potent. My body trembled now, wanting his touch so badly. I’d been so cavalier about being held by him a few days ago, but things between us felt deeper. More. Touching him now would be different.
It would be everything…
“You’ve been important to me for a long time,” I said. “I’ve always felt close to you, Jimmy. No… connected. Do you feel it too?”
“Yeah, I do.” His hand came up and his thumb brushed my chin and then slid along my cheek. “I shouldn’t be doing this.”
“I want you to. So badly.” My eyes fell shut at the sensation and I pressed my cheek into his hand. “In my Cleopatra story, you were my Antony.”
“God, Thea.” His voice hoarse with need and raw emotion.
I opened my eyes and he was right there, breathing my breath as I inhaled his. I could feel his body along every part of mine, a vibration running along the length of me. My cheek where he touched me, down my neck, down to the tips of my breasts that ached and hardened. My hand came up to hold his wrist, and I tilted my chin up to him.
“My Antony…”
His lips brushed mine. The lightest touch, yet the sensation drew a moan from me and an electric current wrapped around my heart. It pulsed as his kiss came again. He captured my upper lip briefly, then the lower, sucking lightly. Exploring.
I clung to him, hardly able to keep my feet, as his hand slipped into my hair, angling my head. My lips parted, ready for him. He made a sound deep in his chest, and his mouth took mine completely, pushing in—the sweetest invasion—and I opened to take it all.
Another moan rose in me at the first taste of his tongue sweeping along mine, and I sank against him. His kiss gave me every part of him—the lust and raw need wrapped around a core of reverence. He kissed me completely, as if his every intention was pouring into my mouth. To take care of me. To cherish me.
To fuck me…
“Oh my God,” I whispered. The thought made me dizzy.
Every electrified particle in my being knew Jimmy’s kiss was a preview of what he would give me in his bed. I’d surrender to my warrior while he worshipped me as his queen. Reverence and need in perfect, equal amounts. I’d come screaming his name.
The thought set my blood on fire. I found my feet, wrapped my arms around his neck, my fingers sinking into his hair, pulling. He dropped one hand to my waist, pressing me to him. Heat flushed my core, aching with want. Lust. Happiness. The intensity of him made my heart pound, overwhelmed by this much need in a man pressed against me, his every muscle and bone and sinew tensed with it.