Every fucking moment.
My arms slipped around her waist and I pulled her close. Her hands slid up my chest and clasped behind my neck.
“Are you going to kiss me now?” she asked. “Please say yes. I’m saying yes, Jimmy.”
Because I’m a choice she’s making.
I bent my head to her until our lips brushed and then I kissed her. No fences or rules or hesitation. I kissed her with my entire heart that had been so fucking vacant until Thea.
Her mouth opened for me with a little sigh, almost like relief. I drank it down and when she moaned softly; I took that too. Inhaled it. Sucking gently because the need to have this piece of happiness was all-consuming. I’d been starving for it my entire life.
The first raindrops began to fall, lightly at first, then harder.
“Oh shit,” Thea said with a breathless laugh.
Lightning crashed, and the sky tore open. The downpour scattered the tourists and sent them running for store awnings while the native New Yorkers calmly opened umbrellas or pulled up hoods on jackets, unfazed.
I ducked into my jacket and shielded Thea with it as we made a mad dash back to the truck. We were drenched by the time we climbed in, Thea’s shirt clinging to her every curve.
“We’ve only been in New York for a few minutes, and I already love it,” she said, her eyes luminous in the dimness. “It doesn’t give a shit that we were trying to have a moment.”
“Not remotely,” I said. “Where to?”
“A close hotel,” Thea said, leaning to kiss my ear. “As close as humanly possible.”
I drove the truck to the closest hotel, the Hilton Times Square, grateful my jeans and the dark concealed how badly I wanted her.
Thea bit her lip as we pulled into the valet. “The parking is as much as the room.”
“I have it covered,” I said. “Let’s do the first night here. We’ll figure the rest out later.”
She grinned. “No script?”
“None.”
We climbed out of the truck, her with her backpack and me with the small duffel I’d packed after I’d received Rita’s text. Thea’s eyes widened as she watched me pull my guitar case from behind the front seat too.
“Are you trying to kill me, Jimmy?”
I shrugged, feeling self-conscious. “I don’t know. You keep asking me to sing. I felt like the odds were good you’d ask me again on this trip.”
“A billion to one, for.” She grinned. “But I have money too,” she added as I tipped the guy at the valet. “You’re not paying for everything. I’ll get the room.”
I didn’t like the idea of Thea spending a dime on me, but this was her trip and part of it was paying her own way after years of dependence on everyone else.
“Do you have something high up with a view?” Thea asked the desk clerk.
“We’re pretty booked…” He tapped his keyboard. “A-ha. You’re in luck. I have a standard room on the thirty-third, two queens, non-smoking.”
“Queen-sized,” she said, heaving a dramatic sigh. “I suppose we can make do.”
He smirked. “Do your best.”
Key cards in hand, we rode the elevator up to the thirty-third floor. The air seemed to thin out as we rose higher and higher, anticipation rising with it. I glanced down at Thea beside me. She looked up, rainwater dripping from her hair, glistening along her skin. Without a word, she stood on tiptoe and planted a kiss on my mouth. Soft lips and the smallest touch of her tongue before pulling away.
Goddamn, if nothing else happens, tonight is already perfect.
The lamps in our room were off, the drapes drawn. The lights of New York City were the only illumination. The grid lay spread below us or rose high in towering pillars. Obelisks of light.
“It’s so perfect,” Thea murmured, echoing my thoughts. She dumped her bag on the bed and moved to stand at the window.
I set my guitar against the wall and my duffel on the other bed, claiming it as mine if that’s what she wanted. For so long, even sitting across from her felt like an invasion of her privacy because she had no way to know if she wanted it. No memory to ask or answer.
Now she can tell me what she wants.
I joined her at the window, and we watched as lightning cracked across the dark night.
“I talk a good game,” she said. “But I’m suddenly really nervous. My heart is racing.”
She took my hand and laid it on the warm skin her tank top didn’t cover. Her pulse thudded under my palm.
“We do what you want to do, Thea.” I brushed a stray lock of damp hair from her cheek. “Whatever you want or nothing at all.”
“I don’t want to do nothing,” she said. “Not ever again. But…” She broke off with a small laugh, looking away.
Inhale. Exhale. “Is this your f-first time?”
“No.” She ran her fingers over my jacket, her gaze following, until she raised her eyes to mine. “But right now, standing here with you, I can’t remember anyone else.”
She moved into the circle of my arms, pressing against me. Every molecule in my body wanted to grab and take but I held her gently. Loosely.
She tilted her head up to mine. “Just kiss me, Jimmy, and let’s see what happens.”
No script. The entire night waiting for us to make of it what we wanted.
I bent and kissed her softly, tasted her lips that parted for me at once, despite the nervousness I felt trembling through her body like an electric current. I deepened the connection, my tongue venturing into hers and she moaned. God, Thea’s moans were like matches tossed on a smoldering fire.
She kissed me back, her tongue sliding against mine, exploring, while her hands slipped into my hair, then to either side of my face, holding me like I was something valuable.
We kissed with growing urgency. When thunder boomed, neither of us flinched. Thea pushed my jacket off my shoulders, her hands roaming as our mouths devoured and plundered, biting and clashing, with our breaths rasping between little sounds of want neither of us could control.
“I’m not nervous anymore,” she breathed. “Because I remember all of you. Us. Everything you ever said or sung to me, Jimmy. Not in my broken mind but here.” She laid her hand over her heart. “I kept you here. Even when my memory wouldn’t let me tell you.”
“You told me,” I said, my own breath coming hard. “I heard you.”
“You fought for me,” she said.
I kissed her again and lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around my waist, never breaking our kiss as I took her to the bed. I laid her down, and she shoved her backpack to the floor, then reached for me as I sank down on top of her. Her body beneath me, straining for me, was driving me out of my mind. I’d never wanted a woman like this in my life. I’d never had a woman like Thea, one I wanted and who wanted me just as I was.
Her hands slid down the sides of my body to my waist. She pulled me against her, lifting her hips to mine, and I ground down on her while I kissed her, sucking gently, eliciting more of those soft little moans that made me crazy.
She tore her mouth from mine, gasping. “Jesus, how do you do that?”
“Do what?” I asked, kissing her neck, her throat, and the delicate skin beneath her ear.