The three of us climb in – I let Royce have shotgun – and head back for the house.
“I’ve got a hot date with a freshly waxed vagina, so I’ll slow to a roll, but you guys gotta jump.”
“You’re an idiot.” Captain shakes his head. “We’re in my truck. Park the damn thing and get your ass out.”
Royce hops out grinning and runs to his own vehicle as Captain steps out the passenger door and when it’s clear he’s rounding the hood and making his way back to the driver’s seat, I leap over the middle console and into the passenger seat.
Captain yanks his door open, his eyes snapping to mine. “What are you doing?”
“I’m bored.”
“I can’t help you, I gotta go.”
I pull the seat belt over me and he frowns.
“Raven, out.”
When I sit back against the seat, he steps back and charges around the hood.
I swiftly lock the doors then jump over the seat to close his.
He bangs on my window and I grin.
“Open the fucking door.”
I turn up the radio, pretending I can’t hear.
He turns to Royce, who is backing out up past us and throws his hands up. “A little help here.”
“Can’t. Fresh. Waxed. Vagina, Cap.” Royce slides on his sunglasses and peels away.
Captain runs his hands down his face, before glaring at me. “Raven, I need to leave. Now. I cannot be late.”
“Get in then.”
He hesitates a minute, then curses and heads around again.
I unlock the door and he jumps inside.
He doesn’t look at me as he pulls out and on to the road. The first twenty minutes we’re on the road, I take in my surroundings – nothing but orchards and corn and boring shit. But when I’m over it and ready to complain about where we’re headed and cry about how much longer, I look to Cap, who glares at the road.
His leg is bouncing, his fingers keep flexing against the wheel, and he keeps taking deep breaths. He’s anxious.
The vehicle slows and he turns down a small side road. He starts bouncing his shoulders as if he’s trying to shake loose, and slips into the first spot he finds, facing an open field that dips down. If all the families shuffling in and out of the cars around means anything, I’d guess there’s a park at the end.
He looks at his watch, then his phone, then his watch again.
“Cap ...”
“Just ... quiet, Raven. Please.”
I pull back, shocked and a little unsure of this is about, so I attempt to lighten the mood.
“Wow, Captain,” I feign annoyance and he drops his head back, not at all wanting to deal with, well, me. “I had no idea you were aware ‘please’ was a thing.”
He scoffs, a small laugh in there somewhere and drops his eyes to me. After a minute he says, “You shouldn’t be here.”
I shrug, because too late now, right?
I look away, sinking back only to lean forward when I spot someone. I squint to see better. “Is that ... that’s my social worker.”
Captain’s head snaps forward and he curses. He blows out a deep breath and climbs out. Before his door slams, he turns back, leveling me with a hard look I’ve yet to see from him. “Stay in here, Raven. I mean it.”
His words are strong, but there’s something deeper than anger in his eyes.
“Okay.” I nod and he pauses a second, before walking away.
I sit back in my seat, crossing my legs Indian style as I trail his every step across the grass. He stops a few feet from Ms. Vega. A few words are exchanged, and then she turns and walks away. I look back to Captain, but he doesn’t move, his eyes follow her.
Just as I look back, a streak of blonde catches my eye.
“What the...”
Captain bends at the knee and a teeny tiny little thing, with a little blonde, bouncy ponytail, and chubby cheeks runs straight into his open arms.
My jaw drops.
Captain buries the little one against his chest and her baby hand sneaks over his shoulder and pats. He pulls back to look at her, only to hug her close again.
He stands, lifting her with him.
And then he carries her down the hill as she giggles in his arm, patting his cheeks playfully.
I’m not sure how long I stare after the two, but when I snap out of it, I lay flat in the front seat, staring up at the roof forcing myself to think of any and everything other than that fact that I just forced him to share something he wasn’t ready to.
Captain was right, I shouldn’t have come.
The door opens and closes with a soft thud.
I wait for the engine to start but nothing happens, so I don’t move.
After about five minutes, his low sigh has my chest growing tight.
“You can stop pretending to be asleep now, Carver.”
“I don’t wanna look at you, Cap. I’m a bitch.”
“That’s not news to me.”
My eyes pop open and I slowly sit up when a hint of a smile hits his lips.
“I shouldn’t have forced you to bring me,” I tell him.
“Nope, you shouldn’t have,” he agrees. “But you did and now here we are.”
“Cap... I...” I throw my hands up and shrug.
“You can’t tell anyone.”
“I don’t have anyone to tell.”
“I’m not playing.” His tone is sterner this time.
I shrug again. “Neither am I, Cap. I have no one to tell, but even if I did, I wouldn’t.”
He eyes me a minute before nodding back and then we’re back on the road.
I try not to stare as he drives, but it’s impossible.
He’s smiling so bright, probably replaying the last hour in his head, but it’s short-lived and the closer we get to the house, the more his shoulders sag, and his face morphs back into the blank stare he shares with the world.
“Do they know?” I ask him quietly.
“They’re my brothers. They know everything...” He trails off.
“But?”
He swallows. “But they haven’t met her yet.”
“Well,” I whisper. “She’s beautiful, packman.”
He smiles wide, a light laugh leaving him.
I bet he’s picturing her little curls and the sound of her voice.
“Tell me her name?”
His features tighten along with his grip on the wheel. “Not today.”
“Fine.” I bounce in my seat, knowing neither of us needs to go back like this. “Take me to get ice cream then.”
Captain throws a grin my way. “All right. Ice cream I can do.”
I jog down the stairs, moving to check the garage, finding nobody. I pull out my cell.
“Yo?” Royce answers on the first ring.
“Where the fuck you guys at?”
I look over when the front door opens and Royce holds his hands out, the phone still to his ear.
I roll my eyes and toss mine to the couch. “Where’d you guys go?”
“I went to Rumi Grey’s house for some solid cardio.”
I look past him, but he shuts the door.
His frown meets mine. “What’s up?”
“Where’s Raven?”
“With Cap, I think.”
“Nah, man, it’s the second Sunday of the month.”