He seems unsure. “Okay? What part?”
I shake my head. “All of it. I want to change the dance, the song, everything.”
“Have you gone completely insane? The recital is in four days!”
Standing my ground, I can already picture the dance in my head. “I don’t care. I need to do this.”
23
Grayson
Kinsley sits across from me, ranting about everything under the sun. Can’t she see that I don’t care what color nail polish Becca had on today? She’s making it hard to enjoy my milkshake—which is really something, because this diner has unbeatable shakes. Still, I pretend to listen and nod my head at all the parts I think are important.
Dating her isn’t something I want, but I have to. It’s a necessary move, albeit one that creates more problems for me than it solves. She’s the kind of person I normally can’t stand to be around, but she’s the only one who can accomplish what I need. Making her my girlfriend isn’t to keep me away from Savannah, it’s to keep Savannah away from me.
I know that if she’s standing in front of me, begging for me to talk to her, I won’t stand a chance. I’ll cave in five seconds flat and hand her my heart on a silver fucking platter. No, I can’t let that happen. Keeping her at a distance is what’s best for both of us.
“You should have seen it,” Kinsley smirks. “She looked so stupid standing there all alone as we all walked away.” Giving her a confused look, she can tell I wasn’t paying attention. “Savannah. Focus, Grayson.”
I shake my head. “Don’t. Don’t talk to me about her.”
“Uh, okay,” she says hesitantly, taking a sip of her water. “You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you two had something going on.”
“What the fuck did I just say?” I snap. “Do you just not know how to listen? I said don’t talk to me about her.”
She scoffs and rolls her eyes, picking up her phone and scrolling through it. Suddenly, the door swings open, and a livid Delaney comes storming toward me, followed by Tessa, who gives me a warning look.
“Grayson Matthew.”
Wow, I’m in middle-name-level trouble. “Who told you that?”
“It doesn’t matter. I need to speak to you.” With a look at Kinsley, she clarifies. “Alone.”
“Uh, excuse me,” Kinsley sasses. “Rude, much? Can’t you see we’re busy here?”
Laney glares at her. “Do I look like fucking care?”
Both mine and Tessa’s eyes widen. Being a Goody Two-shoes since she was little, Delaney Callahan doesn’t use profanity unless she’s really pissed.
Kinsley pouts as Delaney focuses her attention back on me. “Grayson, now!”
“I’d listen to her,” Tessa advises. “She’s been on the war path all damn day.”
Deciding to appease her, I tell Kinsley I’ll be right back and slip out of the booth. Laney shoots one last dirty look at my girlfriend before following me to the parking lot. As soon as we get outside, she looks like she’s going to hit me.
“What on earth is wrong with you?” She shouts. “How could you do that to Savannah?”
“I didn’t do anything to her,” I defend, but we both know that’s a lie.
“Like hell you didn’t. I was there Friday night, picking up the broken pieces you left her in!” She pauses for a second but doesn’t let me get a word in before she continues. “And then you run right to Kinsley? Seriously, Grayson? Kinsley?”
I throw my hands in the air. “I had to, okay? I fucking had to!” Rubbing my hands over my face, I walk over to sit on the step. “I can’t care about her. Not the way she wants me to.”
“You already do. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t have told me where she lives,” she retorts. “You knew damn well I was going to keep her secret. So, don’t even try playing like you were hoping I’d do your dirty work.”
“It doesn’t matter. The past can’t be rewritten, and she can’t undo what she did. We will never be a thing.”
Her brows furrow. “Okay, we’ll pretend like I know what that means.” She runs her fingers through her hair and sighs. “I just don’t want to see you two throw away something that’s been thirteen years in the making. When we were little, you two were the one thing I was sure of.”
I smile sadly. “Things were different then, Laney. So much has changed.”
“Except for the fact that you’re still crazy about each other,” Tessa chimes in, but as soon as I look at her, she raises her hands in surrender. “Sorry, I’ll shut up now.”
“No!” Delaney argues. “Tess is right. I saw it myself, the way you two have been with each other the past few weeks. The way she’s talked about you.” She sighs. “It’s everything you hope to find, and you’re throwing that away.”
A groan rumbles from deep in my throat. “What the hell do you want from me?”
“I want you to admit that you’re in love with her!”
“Of course I’m in love with her!” I laugh dryly. “I have been since I was fucking nine years old.”
She calms her tone, as if she feels like she’s getting through to me. “Then tell her that. Whatever it is, you two can get through it.”
I shake my head. “We can’t. Not with this.” Standing up, I pull my keys from my pocket. “I’m sorry, Laney. Tell Kinsley something came up and I’ll pay her back for the bill.”
“Grayson—” she calls as I go to walk away. I turn back to glance at her, and she looks just as defeated as I feel. “If you change your mind, I have a spare ticket to Savannah’s recital on Friday night. I think you should come.”
With no true intentions of taking her up on that, I nod once and head for my car. It was naive to think I could handle staying around here. The wounds are too fresh for us to coexist right now—too deep for us to avoid causing the other more pain. I need to leave, at least for a little while.
DRIBBLING THE BASKETBALL, TYSON charges at me but he lacks the coordination I have. I spin, going around him and shooting it—nothing but net. The air feels hot in the oversized gym as I fan myself with my shirt. Ty grabs the ball and checks it to me before trying to make it to the hoop. He goes to take the shot, but while he might be two years older, he’s a good six inches shorter. I reach my hand up and block it, laughing as he scowls.
“You’re a little shit, Grayson.”
I give him a knowing look and smile. “I’m not sure you’re really in the place to call someone a little anything.”
He rolls his eyes. “Fuck off. Are you done running from your problems yet? You’ve missed what, three days of school already?”
“Since when do you give a shit how much school I miss?” I steal the ball and take it outside the three-point line.
“Since I promised your mom I’d look out for you.”
Just as I shoot, my phone starts ringing on the bench. I walk over, seeing Kinsley’s name and vomit-inducing picture on the screen. Hitting ignore, I go back to playing the game.