“Screw your hangover, you freaking kissed me! So, now what?”
Holy shit. I run a billion dollar company and have stood in front of ruthless businessmen trying to take me and my company down, and I didn’t so much as blink but now? This damn moment? I’m squeaking like a little girl, and I’m fussing over a kiss. A kiss from a man rooted in my heart but encapsulated by the trauma we both suffered.
“Now we move forward. And I’d like to say we do it without looking back, but it’s inevitable when we need to backtrack and make sure the past stays in the past. But you and I are going to happen. We will learn our ways.”
“Learn our ways,” I echo.
He takes a step forward again and leans in to place his lips right next to my ear as he whispers on a hot breath, “Our ways, gorgeous. All the fucking ways.”
He spins around and heads for the door but stops. “I think it might be best if you pack an overnight bag. I don’t know what they are going to tell us and we might have to spend the night at the clubhouse.”
To distract myself I rush off to my bedroom. I grab a bag from my closet and start to throw in a few things. It did nothing to calm down my raging mind as I walk back into the living room twenty minutes later and throw my bag down.
“You can’t just do that,” I snap, as if we didn’t have a short break in our discussion.
Morgan is bouncing his gaze from me to Shaw while Shaw just freaking shrugs. “I don’t see why not. I finally grabbed a hammer and a few nails and made sure my ducks are, and will fucking stay, in a row.”
Morgan chuckles and I shoot him a death glare, making him instantly shut up so I can direct my attention back to Shaw. “Unsnap those ducks because you might be ready, but I’m not. And all of this—”
Shaw steps closer and cuts me off. “I’m not ready either, but if there’s anything I’ve learned from almost being ripped from this fucked-up planet is that there never is a good enough time to be ready for anything. So, we’re doing this right fucking now. Morgan, get her bag and bring the SUV around.”
We’re staring at each other in silence until the door falls shut behind Morgan.
“This is where it all starts,” Shaw says. “Remember this moment where we’re standing in front of each other knowing we’re moving forward. I never stopped loving you. I kept track of your every move through all the years. There hasn’t been a woman able to touch me the way you have a hold on me. And as fucking scared as I am at failing you, I’m equally scared of giving myself to you. Fuck,” he bellows and covers his face with his hands as he mutters, “I’m not making sense, am I?”
My heart is thumping in overdrive. He took the first step a moment ago, taking another one just now. This whole thing could go two steps forward and one step back but I can’t keep lying to myself. I want him. I want this intense relationship we once had back. I need there to be an us as much as he longs for it too.
Swallowing hard I do the one thing I know would put the both of us instantly on edge. Maybe it’s too soon—too fast—but I’ve always been one to be all hands on, and I think it’s time to reach out and grab hold. And I do. Shaw sucks in a harsh breath when I wrap my fingers around his wrists and pull his hands away from his face.
Emotions thick, patience thin. Hunger vivid while hesitation is bubbling at the surface. I push through every heightened feeling and lean in to take a hint of the pleasure I felt when Shaw did the same and connect our lips swiftly yet firm before pulling back completely.
“We start this, there’s no going back, understand? Fully in, the both of us,” I demand.
Our chests are rising and falling in a rapid rhythm.
“Fully in,” he echoes. “Let’s go and get this shit over with. And just so you know.” He points a finger in my face. “I will be cutting up the food at least once a week and you’re not going to complain or glare at me when the chunks are uneven.”
I throw my hands in the air and growl, “Fine.”
Internally I’m smiling and cringing simultaneously. He knows how badly the struggle for me is with these little things, and in some way, it compares to our situation. The give and take part is crucial and a first step. Nothing is ever perfect nor should it be and acceptance is a huge part of it, I know it all too well.
He shoots me a smirk and opens the door for me when we approach the SUV. Morgan is behind the wheel and Shaw is in the front. I’d managed to snatch my laptop bag on my way out and from the backseat I can answer some emails before we arrive at the clubhouse.
I’m still working when I hear Shaw’s voice from beside me. “Wrap it up, Val.”
“Give me a moment,” I snap, somewhat harshly since I’m engrossed in this email I have to finish.
“You already got a moment when I asked you nicely two fucking times and I’m done being nice,” he snaps back.
I tear my eyes away and growl, “Don’t push me.”
A smirk slides on his face. “Gorgeous, if I was pushing you, you would fucking feel it.”
I slam my laptop closed and jump out of the SUV. I’m about to rip him a new asshole but the laughter of two people stops me.
There’s a woman standing to the side with dirty blonde hair, around the age of forty, or older since she’s looking good for her age. Next to her is an inked-up man around the same age wearing a leather cut with different patches than the Wicked Throttle MC ones.
“They are almost as bad as we are,” the woman says.
The man next to her smiles and kisses the top of her head. “No one compares to us, Hotlips.”
She beams up at him. “So very true.”
Since the argument between us fell flat, I grab my laptop and stash it in its bag before I head for the clubhouse. Shaw follows close behind me when Morgan holds the door open for us. We stroll inside, the two other people trailing along with us.
Zerox stalks toward the inked-up man and offers his hand for him to shake. “Deeds, thanks so much for coming over. Appreciate it.”
The man gives him an easy smile in return and shakes his hand. “Always a pleasure. Even more when it concerns a case as fucked-up as this one. You mentioned there was an old lady involved?”
Zerox turns to me. “Valentina, I’d like you to meet Deeds, president of Broken Deeds MC, and his old lady, Lynn.”
We all shake hands with warm, welcoming smiles. Zerox ushers all of us inside the room they call church.
“I’m suggesting the five of us discuss this first before we choose how to handle this further,” Zerox says but he’s addressing Shaw.
Chapter Five
Beecher
“You’re telling me those two fuckers who kidnapped us had some auxiliary storage space somewhere where everything they did had a back-up?” I growl, not believing the shit I’m hearing.
Deeds nods. “That’s correct. And from what we found out, the ones who kidnapped you? It wasn’t their first time either. Our computer tech team managed to track things down to one location. The storage space was destroyed and the woman who owned it was murdered. Her murder was never solved but I’m getting the feeling by the other information we obtained that we are dealing with a well setup chain who deals in snuff films.”