You and me.
You and me.
There was never going to be a him and me.
My belly, twisted in knots, screwed up tighter and the pain was excruciating.
He stared at me, his eyes moving over my features, and I watched in horrified fascination through the pain as his face grew terrifyingly dark.
Then he whispered, “You have got to be fuckin’ shitting me.”
I didn’t know if I was shitting him. I didn’t know what the heck I was doing.
“Tell me, Tab, that you’re shittin’ me,” he demanded.
“Honestly, Shy, I don’t know what I’m doing,” I admitted.
“I do,” he ground out. “You’re standin’ there tellin’ me, years, fuckin’ years ago you were into me, I fucked that up, you held a grudge, also for fuckin’ years, you lost everything, and only then did you let me back in. Now, you find I got a life without you in it, a woman, and you can’t deal. For fuckin’ months I listened to you talk about him. I held you while you cried about him. Now you’re handin’ me this shit?”
He had a point about that too.
God! What was I doing?
“Shy—” I tried to instigate damage control.
I failed.
Spectacularly.
The damage was done, no way to control it.
“No,” he bit off. “You need to disappear to get your head straight, Tabby? You fuckin’ do it. That works for me. I don’t take rides I don’t like, and I just found out I was on a ride I didn’t know I was takin’, and I don’t like it. So you go into your head and get it straight, Tab, but you don’t come back to me until you got your head straight. No sooner, babe. I do not need that shit in my life. I am not gonna see you through that shit your way, tied to your strings. I’m cuttin’ myself loose. You come to me and you don’t got your shit sorted, you wanna get your head straight draggin’ me along with you, you can go fuck yourself.”
With that, he pulled his keys out of his jeans, twisted my key off the ring, and my heart twisted when he dropped it on the coffee table. Then he prowled to the door and slammed it behind him.
Woodenly, I walked to the door and locked it.
Just as woodenly, I walked to my couch and sat on the edge.
I heard his Harley pipes roar, and I stared at my wall unseeing, listening as they growled until I couldn’t hear them anymore.
Only then did I collapse, my face in my hands as I burst into tears.
Chapter Seven
You Are Not Leaving
One month later…
Shy walked out of his apartment, locked the door, and headed to the stairs.
These days, he stayed there, seeing as Rosalie cleaned it and also seeing as, since he didn’t have Tabby’s cupboards to fill anymore, he hauled his ass out and bought groceries for his own damned house. He also stayed there because Rosalie was not the kind of woman you banged in a bed in a biker Compound while men were raising hell in the common room or tapping ass in rooms down the hall. She was the kind of woman you banged in an apartment that was two steps up from shithole that she kept clean.
He jogged down the stairs, moved into the sun, and saw Roscoe sitting astride his bike. His brother was there because they had some Chaos business to see to.
Shy tipped his chin up, Roscoe tipped his back, and Shy moved to his bike.
He threw a leg over and was starting the ignition when Roscoe spoke.
“Sucks, man.”
Shy turned his head to Roscoe. “What sucks?”
“Tab takin’ off to Cape Cod.”
That burn hit his chest encroaching dangerously close to his heart. A burn he hadn’t felt for four months. A burn that, over the last month, smoldered deep. Now it fanned to life and singed his lungs.
“Say again?” he asked and Roscoe’s eyebrows knitted.
“You didn’t know?” he asked back.
“No, I didn’t fuckin’ know,” Shy bit out. “Tabby’s goin’ to Cape Cod?”
“How can you not know? You two are tight. You’re not bangin’ Rosalie, you’re up in Tab’s space.”
“I didn’t know, Roscoe,” he clipped. “She’s goin’ to Cape Cod?”
Roscoe nodded. “Yeah, brother. Some doctor at work was up in her shit, she couldn’t take it anymore, so she quit her job. She’s packin’ up her shit, storin’ it up at Tack and Cherry’s, and headin’ out. Some traveling nurse’s program, six-month contract.”
Shy’s vision went hazy.
He could not believe this shit.
That bitch.
That fucking bitch.
She was leaving.
Leaving her family, leaving him, leaving people who had taken her back for a fucking year.
Leaving.
Leaving him.
“Not doin’ this,” he growled right before his bike roared to life.
“Doin’ what?” Roscoe shouted over the pipes and Shy looked to him.
“This. Our gig. You need someone at your back, call Tug or Snapper. I got shit to do.”
Before Roscoe could say anything, Shy backed out and roared out of the parking lot.
On his way to Tab’s, he did not make one single effort to calm his ass down. He’d need everything he had not to wring her pretty neck when he got there and lit into her.
Leaving.
Leaving him.
Fuck!
Ten minutes later, he pulled up outside her apartment, parked, switched off the bike, and scanned for rides he knew.
Tack’s bike wasn’t there, neither was his Expedition. Cherry’s Mustang wasn’t there. Tab’s girl Natalie’s ride wasn’t there either.
But Tabby’s electric blue ride that she took care of like it was her baby was gleaming in the sun.
The way clear, Shy swung off his bike, jogged to the steps, took them two at a time, and didn’t hesitate to pound his fist on her door the instant he hit it. He also didn’t stop pounding until he heard the locks turn and the door was thrown open.
“Jeez, Shy, what’s the deal?” Tabby snapped, staring up at him.
He hadn’t seen her in a month.
This meant that was the wrong greeting.
The way wrong greeting.
Making matters even worse, behind her everything but the furniture was boxed up.
Fighting back his need to explode, he prowled in and Tabby had to jump out of his way. Once in, he turned on her.
“Shut the door, Tabby,” he ordered.
“Shy, what—?”
“Shut the fuckin’ door, Tabby!” he roared and watched her face pale as she shut the door and turned to him.
“Okay, Shy, calm down. We’ll talk,” she said gently.
“You leavin’?” he asked.
“I…” she hesitated, licked her fucking lip and, Christ, that hit him straight in his dick like that always hit him straight in his dick. “Yes, Shy,” she admitted. “I was gonna call you next week. Talk to you. Tell you what’s—”
He cut her off, “You’re not leavin’.”
Her head jerked then she told him, “I am, Shy. I need space to get my head together. The contracts are signed—”
“You,” he interrupted her again, “Are. Not. Leaving.”
She shut her mouth and stared at him.