I couldn’t tell if that was a good thing or not. And I was almost too afraid to ask. Then she pushed back from my chest and looked up at me with glazed eyes. “That was... Holy cow, that was intense. I think I came as soon as you were inside me.”
“Almost.” I studied her face for any sign I’d hurt her. “How do you feel?”
“Limp.” A slow smile spread across her face. “Yours.”
That one word melted me. I groaned and dragged her mouth back to mine. “You are mine,” I said between kisses. “All mine now. Only mine. And I’m yours. Always.”
She smiled against me. “Good. Because I don’t think I can walk anymore. You might have broken me.”
“No way. You’re too tough.”
Her grin widened. “Maybe I am. But so are you. Thank you for that.”
“For introducing you to really dirty sex?”
She laughed. “No.” Then she sobered as she looked up at me. “For being you again.” Her eyes grew misty. “I-I missed you, Luc. I missed all of you.”
“Ah, vita mia.” I swiped a tear from her cheek with the back of my hand, knowing exactly what she meant, moved by the power of her love for me. “I was always here. Part of me just got a little lost along the way. But I promise you, no matter what happens, I will always find my way back to you. No matter what.”
She lifted her mouth to mine and kissed me. And, overwhelmed by her strength, her love, by everything about her, I pushed to my feet, lifted her into my arms, and carried her into the shower.
I washed every part of her body, then mine. She leaned back against the tile wall and sighed as I rinsed her.
My stomach dropped when I spotted the bruises on her breast and realized I’d been too rough with her, but she soothed me with a kiss and told me she was fine. That she liked what I’d done. That she liked everything I did to her. And when she tried to drop to her knees and take me into her mouth, I didn’t let her. I touched her between her legs until she trembled against me, then I lowered myself to the shower floor and pleasured her all over again with my tongue.
Afterward, we curled around each other naked in bed, and I held her to me as she fell back to sleep. And as my mind drifted to everything that had happened the last few days, I knew it wasn’t any doctor or medicine that had healed me.
It was her. Her trust, her love, her unfailing belief that we were meant to be together were the reasons I was alive now.
She had saved me. Not from the evil of my House but from myself.
She was the only person in this world who could.
12
Natalie
I was a terrible human being. A liar who was about to betray the only person in the world who mattered to me. And there was nothing I could do to stop that from happening.
I forced back the nausea as I lay in bed and stared at the coffered ceiling. The scents of frying bacon filled the room from downstairs. Luc had left me a half hour ago with a kiss to my forehead, telling me to sleep a little longer while he made breakfast.
I didn’t want breakfast. I didn’t want anything but him. I wanted him to climb back in this bed with me, for us to throw the covers over our heads, and pretend like the outside world didn’t exist.
But, of course, we couldn’t do that. His House—the evil men who ruled his country and the world—were out there. They were watching. Lurking in the shadows. Just waiting for me to fulfill my end of our deal. And like the submissive, powerless woman they expected me to be, I was going to give them exactly what they wanted.
Bile pushed up my throat. I managed to throw the covers back and rush to the toilet before I lost it. Since I hadn’t eaten very much yesterday, there wasn’t much in my stomach, but my body revolted until I was left weak and shaking on the bathroom floor, trying to figure out what I was going to say to Luc, trying to figure out how I could keep from making him hate me.
Bracing my back against the wall, I drew my feet in close, perched my elbows on my knees, and dropped my head into my hands. I’d been terrified last night when Luc had seen the bruises on my breast. Terrified and desperate to distract him. He hadn’t known what he’d been looking at. He’d thought he’d hurt me. Then to make me feel better, he’d pleasured me all over again. And like the awful person I’d become, I’d let him. I’d let him while I’d been plotting how to return him to the people who’d raped him.
Oh God... I pulled on my hair. All this was my fault. If I hadn’t gone to New York, if I hadn’t stuck my nose where it didn’t belong, if I hadn’t been looking for answers about Elena’s death, none of this would have happened.
A knock sounded at the bathroom door. My head came up, and horror tightened my throat until I realized I’d shoved the door closed behind me when I’d raced in here.
“Angioletto?” Luc called. “Breakfast is ready.”
I scrambled to my feet. “O-okay. I’ll be right down.”
“Don’t take too long.” He hesitated a second, then said, “Are you all right?”
“I-I’m fine,” I lied, hoping he couldn’t hear the fear in my voice. “I just woke up.”
“Okay. It’s getting cold, so hurry.”
I waited until I heard his footsteps moving away, and when they were gone, I closed my eyes as I slumped over the sink.
Nausea brewed in my stomach all over again, but I forced it back as I braced my hands on the counter. I could do this. I breathed slowly, working to bring my heart rate back down. All I had to do was come up with a convincing lie of desperate proportions that would make him think I hadn’t betrayed him.
Desperate proportions...
My brain latched on to one possibility.
It was a long shot. I stared at my pale reflection in the mirror, a plan slowly coming into focus. He’d figure out I’d lied to him eventually. But if I could get Marco and Felicity to help me come up with a cover for that once we were back in Italy, it just might work.
Knowing I was out of time and options, I splashed water on my face, twisted my hair into a knot, and brushed my teeth. Then I took one last look at my reflection and said, “Enough stalling.”
I tugged on a pair of pajama bottoms and found a sweatshirt in Luc’s drawer. It fell to my thighs, and I had to push the sleeves up because they were too long, but I didn’t care. I was chilled right to the bone, and I needed as much warmth as I could find.
Luc was at the stove, in jeans and a loose gray Henley, stirring something in a pot when I entered the room. He looked up when he heard me, and when our eyes locked, I watched a warm, relaxed smile spread across his face, one I hadn’t seen in weeks.
“There you are,” he said as he flipped off the burner. “I was sure you went back to bed.”
If only...
Oh God... I was going to hell. I was about to ruin everything. Take away that easy, happy look. Hurt the one person in the world I never wanted to hurt.
I forced a smile I didn’t feel and moved toward the coffeepot. “Someone wore me out last night.”
Luc’s lips brushed my nape as I reached for a mug from the cabinet. “I think someone liked the way I wore her out last night.”
A shiver rushed down my spine. I had liked that. More than I’d expected. Of course, I loved anything he did to me when he was in domineering-Luc mode. And I was deathly afraid what I was about to do was going to take that Luc from me all over again.