“So, you live in Hermosa Beach?”
“Yes, in your old room.” She smiles faintly. “I’m working at a law firm, helping out with admin stuff, and at nights I work some shifts at a bar near the beach. Just keeping myself busy and trying to save enough to move out.”
It’s so much information to take in. She had finally done it, learned how to stand on her own two feet. I’m fucking proud of her, but judging by the way she’s distanced herself from me on the sofa, our friendship is far from repaired.
“Listen, I should go, right?” She tugs on the hem of the T-shirt. “I feel so seedy. Can I use your bathroom?”
I motion for her to follow me as she grabs her dress, pulling the tee down to cover her bare legs as she walks.
Opening the door to the bathroom, I point to the spare towels and toiletries.
“Wow!” She whistles, scanning the room. “Nice bathroom.”
“Enjoy,” I say, before closing the door behind me.
This is going to kill me.
Go get a coffee or make breakfast, don’t just stand here and imagine what’s happening on the other side.
“Oliver,” Gabriella calls. “I don’t know how to work your fancy shower.”
“You press the button, swivel left, then push.”
“What?”
“Let me come in.”
“You can’t come in,” she blurts out.
“Stop being a baby. Put a towel on.”
I hear her cursing me until the door unlocks.
Standing behind the door, my charcoal-colored towel is wrapped around her body. It takes every fiber of my being not to make a comment or even imagine what that towel would look like on the floor with her body stark naked in front of me. My boxers become increasingly tight with the shaft of my dick refusing to settle down.
I lean into the shower and start it, the water falling instantly.
“How do you take it?”
“Take what?” she asks, removing herself from behind the door.
“Your shower? Soft, hard…”
“Soft... hard? I don’t know. What kind of question is that?”
“A very valid one. I, for one, take it hard.”
She bursts out laughing, her hand moving toward her mouth until the towel slips, and she pulls it up in a panic. “Okay, nice piece of information. This shower is massive, you could fit a whole soccer team in here.”
“I guess. But wouldn’t that be awkward?”
“Yeah, for you. I wouldn’t say no to your team. Bow chicka wow wow.”
I laugh, shaking my head. “Chance’s drink helped?”
“Sadly, yes. The guy is always right.”
“So, I should go…”
“Yes, you should…”
I hesitate at the door, turning around, I want to take her, all of her again, but I know my heart won’t be able to cope with the loss again. Gabriella has a power over me no other woman has even come close to. She’s a magnetic force, and right now, I am fighting all odds trying to walk away.
“Olly?”
“Yes, Gabs?”
“Stay,” she whispers.
“Stay?”
Gabriella unravels her towel until it falls on the floor. She climbs into the shower, her beautiful naked body completely bare in front of me. My lips part at the sweet sight, eye contact firm on her perfect breasts. The water cascades in droplets down her skin, slipping past her hard nipples and dripping off, teasing me as they stand erect.
I lean against the door, unzipping my pants and placing my hand on my shaft. Every fucking stroke feels like heaven, an ache on the verge of combusting.
Her hand glides past her breasts, settling between her legs. The desperation is fueled by desire, so she doesn’t hesitate, sliding her fingers against her clit as a long-winded moan escapes her lips.
The steam inside the room begins to rise, my body hot beneath my clothes. Watching her against the shower wall, rubbing her pussy with a sweet delight, drives me to a maddening finish until I can’t cope any longer, exploding all over my hands in a pleasurable climax.
Fuck.
Her finish is hard and fast with a string of moans until the high pitch levels out to just heavy breathing.
This moment had been what we both needed. I want to bare my soul to her, tell her the air around me is nothing without her in my life.
But we both remain silent.
So many words, yet not enough can ever be said.
I close the door behind me and retreat to my bedroom to clean myself up and gain some clarity.
Rubbing my hands through my hair, I walk into the lounge room where she’s gathering her things.
Looking downward, she stops. “I need to go, Oliver.” Her voice sounds strained. “I can’t be just friends with you. I’m selfish, spoiled, I know, but I want it all. And you… you need to focus on you.”
“Gabriella,” I murmur, torn at the sight of her leaving. Again.
Her gaze meets mine staring back at me with a conflicted expression. I know that no matter what I say, Gabriella will walk away.
With a wavering smile, she walks toward me and stands on her tiptoes to reach the side of my cheek with her lips. “Goodbye, Oliver. It’s time for you to shine, again.”
She’s right. It is my time to shine again. I’ve worked myself to the grave to be the best I can be to fulfill my needs. Soccer will always be my life.
I have to say goodbye.
The love I have for her will never fade away, no matter the harsh words or the failings of the moment. Gabriella has imprinted her soul on my own. We’re two people destined to be together yet torn apart by the force of our own foolish actions.
I know she’s deeply sorry for her actions. I just can’t see past my arrogant ways to accept my own faults.
And so, I let her go.
My choice.
My decision.
My way of fighting against what my heart wants.
Gabriella
The airport looks more like a shopping mall than a building transporting people back and forth from domestic and international destinations.
I arrive with plenty of time to spare, still managing to meet Miles for a farewell coffee. Much like our initial meeting, he was just as welcoming. We made plans to keep in contact via the phone and social media, and he even mentioned a trip to California in a few months when his twins graduate.
Meeting Miles was my scapegoat for leaving Oliver’s apartment. The damage is done. I had laid my cards out, more so than I ever thought possible. I never expected him to beg me to stay. Oliver will always be Oliver. Soccer is his life, and he deserves to welcome that back without my presence as a distraction.
It is time for me to leave, for good. I did what I needed to do here in Australia. I’ve answered the burning questions of my paternity and visited the ghosts of my past by confronting Oliver. I even succumbed to my desire to be close to him—the shower incident based on spontaneity.
Yet, deep down inside, I know my heart can only withstand so much. I’ve built a wall, a defense mechanism to fight the turmoil of saying goodbye to Oliver.