He chuckles. “Also, I’m planning on proposing to your crazy sister when we’re in Milan this fall. Just thought I would tell you.”
I glance at him. “Asking my permission, boss man?”
“Absolutely not. Syd would have my ass if she knew I asked you for permission to marry her. The woman takes her independence very seriously.”
“You’re afraid of my sister?”
“Of course.”
I laugh out loud at that. “Damn, it’s gonna be nice to have another guy around in our family tree.”
“You have a whole lot of them. With me comes my brothers. You will both be our family from now on.”
Something warm and happy moves through me. Even with the mess I’m in right now—or maybe because of it—I really need that back up.
“Thanks,” I say, then I remember Carter’s one of his brothers and my smile fades.
“Ha! Don’t worry. Carter isn’t interested in Nancy.”
“How did you know I was thinking about him?”
“Because we all get that look when thinking about him. I love him to death, but the dude drives me up the wall. You’ll see.”
Just as he says it, the trio come out of the store, laughing and talking excitedly. I hope so because I really don’t want to have to beat up one of my new “brothers.”
After we see Syd and the Hawthornes off, we decide to watch a movie.
I talk her into a funny horror movie. She’s not usually one for gore, but if there is some wicked humor in the movie, she can stomach it. Otherwise, she says it reminds her too much of her family.
That thought usually brings a smile to my face, but it isn’t doing it tonight. There are so many complications in our relationship right now. I think I’ve made some progress in that area, but with some jerk knifing her tires, things are a little tense. I tried to downplay it in front of my sister, but I know Nancy is worried. Then, there is our show and how I am going to have to beg her to return. I’ve made a lot of mistakes lately and they end with Sarah, the woman I was dating while we were in Amarillo.
Fucking Sarah. The truth is, the woman isn’t really interested in me. She wants an in with the network and while I will be happy to give her a reference—she’s funny and a bit of ham in front of the camera—I don’t want to say anything to Nancy about it. Usually, I talk things like that through with her. She’s been touchy about Sarah since she met her. I have no idea why. It was why I suggested she work for us. I wanted to get a rise out of Nancy, but it was a stupid move. Most of my moves have been stupid when it comes to Nancy. It’s probably because I don’t have much blood left in my brain when I’m around her.
I’m thankful it’s a movie I’ve seen before so I can think things through. I glance over at Nancy. She seems consumed by the movie, so I feel free to study her for a few moments. She’s no longer as skinny as she was when we were teenagers. Instead, she’s filled out perfectly—at least in my opinion. Although, I noticed that she was losing weight this season. Not sure what that’s about, but seeing that she ate her brisket and sides, along with some dessert at lunch, makes me feel better. She’s never been a woman who worried about her size, even after we got the show. So many women get pressured to lose weight if they are in front of the camera, but she never seemed to care.
She has one of those kinds of bodies that seem perfect. She might not be tall, but she has curves for miles. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fantasized about holding onto her hips as I thrust hard and fast into her sweet hot cunt.
I sigh and try to push that idea out of my head. Kind of hard to do that with her sharing the couch with me.
“Stop looking at me,” she says, without looking away from Woody Harrelson as he battles zombies.
“Sorry. I was just thinking that you…”
Fuck. I was just about to admit what I was thinking. My thoughts seem to bleed out of my brain as I come up with something else to say. Most of the time I am good with women, but I always seem to step on my tongue when dealing with Nancy.
She glances at me. She has the prettiest blue eyes. They are dark blue with a rim of gold around the iris. “What?”
“Just thinking about how we both changed since high school.”
She smiles, then looks back at the TV. “Yeah. God, I’m so glad I get to eat all the carbs.”
Her mother had her on the beauty queen circuit when she was younger. Nancy hated it and in an act of rebellion, had dyed her hair pink. In those days, it was unheard of and she claims her mother is still angry over it.
She grabs the remote and pauses the movie. “Speaking of which, I was thinking of making some popcorn.”
There is one thing she can do in the kitchen and that’s make popcorn. She has one of those popcorn poppers for the stovetop.
“That sounds fantastic.”
She pops up off the couch and heads into the kitchen just as my phone buzzes. I look it and relax when I see it’s my sister.
Evil Sis: How’s it hanging?
Me: Is that something you should ask your brother?
Evil Sis: Sure.
I roll my eyes. Still as inappropriate as always.
Evil Sis: How are things going there?
Me: Fine.
Evil Sis: That is the female code word for DANGER.
Me: I’m not a female.
Evil Sis: Well, you are missing your balls. Or have you finally found them?
I shake my head as I hear the popping from the kitchen.
“Do you want butter?” Nancy calls out.
“Always.”
Me: So you think I don’t have balls?
Evil Sis: I know what you want. Exactly what you want. And someday, you have to take what you want. Take that chance.
That is unlike her. Oh, she likes to throw out advice all the time, but it’s like she’s reading my mind.
Me: Are you talking about the show?
Evil Sis: No.
Yep, of course she knows about my crush. I’ve been in love with Nancy for so long, I knew Syd picked up on it when we were younger. Apparently, I haven’t been hiding it as good as I thought as an adult. There’s no getting around it now if Syd has already figured it out. So, I might as well get her feelings on the subject. I need all the help I can get.
Me: What if I take a chance and it ruins the show?
Evil Sis: If you don’t, you might lose her forever. What will you do if she ever meets a man and gets serious? Which do you think is worse?
“Who are you chatting with?” Nancy asks, causing me to almost drop the phone.
I watch her as she settles on the opposite end of the couch, placing the bowl between us.
“Syd.”
“Oh? She hasn’t texted me.”
I chuckle. “She’s just busting my balls. You know, the regular crap.”
She smiles at me and all of a sudden, my throat goes dry. The light from the kitchen gives her a glow, or is that my imagination? I always see her as this unattainable woman, the one that will never be mine. But I always thought she would be around. I could admire her from afar, or close up, just no touching.
You might lose her forever.
Those words are circling around in my brain. Right now, I couldn’t give a shit about Flipping Texas. None of that will matter if Nancy isn’t there. It was her idea for me to pitch to At Home, she’s the creative genius behind most of our episodes. But it isn’t that part I’d miss. It is her. Just her. If she isn’t in my life…I’d rather just not think about that.