When the music abruptly stopped, my ears fell into an abyss of silence and loneliness. Xari’s music was fucking brilliant.
“Did you hear that?” She asked, standing and taking a few steps toward me. Her narrow shoulders were squared like we were facing off or something.
“The music? Yeah.”
“No. The passion. The precision. I’m the absolute fucking best. Not because I can outplay any other harpist but because I get up and challenge myself every day. I go harder than I did the day before. I work until nothing makes sense and real-life bleeds away. Sometimes, I fall asleep playing.
You know why, Evander?” She tipped her head to one side and my hand broke the rules to touch her once again. My fingertips slid along her silky bare shoulder. Sun-kissed brown sugar.
“Why, Xari?” I asked with a sigh.
“Because I’m obsessed with it. It’s running through me. I play the harp in my sleep. I dream about sitting on stage with an orchestra. I play solos when I daydream. I see my audience and hear their applause.” The pulse at the base of her throat jumped with excitement and it was contagious. The more she spoke, the more I saw myself every night tapping away at keys. I saw myself hunched over my desk at work just getting any amount of words in so that my day didn’t feel like a waste.
Passion.
That’s what she sparked in me. I felt it crackle through my body like lightning. My pulse matched hers. I slid my finger to the dip between her delicate collarbones but I only let it sit for a second before moving to her chin, tipping her head up so I could see better into those pools of coffee. I wanted my lips on hers. I wanted to kiss away the color until nothing remained and she was bare.
She wanted it too. I saw the way her thick lashes dropped, casting half-moon shadows on her cheeks. I felt her breathing hitch and I saw the subtle goosebumps roll across her golden skin.
I dipped my head, studying the way sunlight licked her regal cheekbones and danced along her freckles. The desire to kiss her burned slow beneath my morals and logic, singeing the rope holding them together.
Her soft panting was warm on my lips. I could almost taste whatever fruity candy she’d been sucking on before. I wanted to taste the candy on her tongue. Sucking and probing and owning.
“Xari did your harp come?” Frankie’s voice bounced around the corner. It was a grenade destroying any semblance of a kiss that might have been shared between us.
Wide espresso eyes popped open and regarded me. A soft flush crept across the tops of her cheeks and mottled her throat like she held the same burning desire inside that I did. I had to get the fuck away from her before I made some bad decisions.
I’d never been happier to see my child walk into a room. Her bight eyes and smiling face put me where I was supposed to be. I was a father. I was a goddamn senator, and I’d employed Xari to take care of my daughter when I was at work.
I couldn’t get caught fucking my nanny. It was to cliché. It would tarnish my image. Alexis would have a field day and try to take Frankie back. That was all the motivation I needed to pretend like that almost-kiss never happened.
“Yeah, it came. All in one piece too,” Xari grinned. It was pulled a little too tight. I tried to steal a glance at the tell-tale thump at the base of her throat but she’d already dissolved into her role with Frankie. I took that as my sign to get the hell out of there and back to the den where I could throw myself into my book. It was either that or go to my room, lock the door, and jerk my dick until I came.
…
ELEVEN
“Wake up! Wake up!”
I pushed my satin sleep mask onto my forehead and looked at Frankie bouncing on my bed like a lunatic.
“What’s up, Frank?” I dragged myself into a sitting position and waited for her to explain why she was waking me up.
“You know what today is?” Her smile was so big and bright I didn’t need to open the curtains to see the sun.
“What’s today, Frank?” I rubbed my tired eyes and stretched my hands high above my head to work out the stiff kinks in my back.
“The last day of your one-month probationary period. I know Daddy is going to hire you for good and I think Mom will come around too. She’s tired of picking me up from school every day.” She climbed up beside me in bed and laid her head on my shoulder. I stroked her fluffy curls and sighed softly.
“I hope he hires me for good.” The weekly paychecks helped to pay my car note but it wasn’t enough to put a payment on all of my cards. I should have canceled most of them like Evander suggested.
I was just so happy to be able to pay for my car that I didn’t think much beyond it. I still hadn’t figured out how to make extra money to help pay more of my bills. I told myself that if I was hired permanently that I’d figure it all out then. Today was the moment of truth.
“Come on, let’s go downstairs and make pancakes. Nobody can say no with pancakes for breakfast.” The shining innocence in her eyes was so damn cute. Sometimes Frankie was this amazingly mature twelve-year-old then other times she reminded me that she was still a child in all the ways that mattered. She still saw the world through rose-colored glasses and she still thought life went on forever. We were only eight years apart but the realization had already hit me that nothing lasted forever.
I understood that once my parents let me know they were serious about cutting me off so I could stand on my own two feet. I also understood why I shouldn’t count on anything as permanent. I had to take care of myself because it wasn’t anyone else’s responsibility. It was hard work untangling the mess I’d left for myself though.
I went into the kitchen with Frankie and started on homemade pancakes. I’d been showing her how to make something other than scrambled eggs, so she was excited to measure everything out and get the griddle ready. I promised her by the time I was done teaching her, she’d be a pro.
“Use the scoop and pour it onto the griddle, right? But mine never come out round like yours.” Her full lips fell into a pout.
“Practice makes perfect, Frankie. The fucked up pancakes are still edible. Plus, not everyone can be perfect like me.” I grinned then batted my lashes at her. Her response was to shove me until I stumbled to the side, mostly because of how hard I was laughing.
“Hey, Miss Lucas, watch your mouth.” Evander walked into the kitchen and my stomach flopped.
After we came so close to kissing last month, I tried my best to stay out of his way and keep things professional.
Me. Keeping things professional. Let that sink in.
Normally, I would have poked at him until he confessed his attraction to me, then I would have fucked him just to blow his mind and confirm that he was indeed made from darling dick stock. Instead, the new version of me was steering clear of anything that could jeopardize my job.
It didn’t change the fact that whenever he walked into a room my body went fucking nuts and I had to physically restrain myself. When I saw him standing at the island wearing a pair of red and gray sweats and a matching hoodie, I thought I would flood my fucking leggings because I damn sure didn’t have on panties.
The way he effortlessly switched between a suit and tie and streetwear was fascinating. I, on the other hand, only had one mode. Fabulous. At. All. Times.