“Toby, where is she right now?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” Toby said. “But I’ll tell you this, Reed. Stop making fucking messes. Okay?”
Toby walked away.
Nash dragged Jay away.
Dex shook his head and went a different way to get out of my house.
It was just Sab. He grabbed my shoulder. “Listen, bro. I get it. That deep, gut wrenching feeling. There’s no way to navigate it. Just don’t end up like Mitchy.”
My lip curled at that name.
I had nothing to say about it.
Sab was right.
The rest of the band was right to be pissed at me.
I wasn’t Mitchy though. I was never going to be Mitchy.
I took two steps and stopped.
“Fuck,” I whispered.
I dropped to my knees and threw up on the floor.
“I hear that, Reed,” I heard Neils yell from the kitchen. “I’ll get you fixed up in no time. But I’m not cleaning up puke.”
I gasped for a breath and I smiled.
I thought about Abby.
When she showed up and threw up in my driveway.
Trying to hide her feelings for me.
And here I was, throwing up on my own floor because I was hiding my feelings for her.
That’s when I knew something needed to happen… once and for all.
20
ABBY
I walked out of my bedroom to find Valerie bent over, her hands under her feet, topless, but thankfully she was wearing underwear. Not panties. These were undies. They looked like shorts, which was good. The more they covered, the better.
She wavered back and forth as her boobs hung up into her face.
Good morning to me…
I walked to the kitchen to get coffee.
“I’ll be done in a second,” Valerie said. “Just two more breaths to stretch it all out.”
“Take your time,” I said.
I poured some coffee and Valerie lifted herself up.
She turned to face me and put her hands to her hips.
Still topless.
“Can I ask…”
I pointed to her chest.
“What?” She looked down. “Oh? You mean… half naked doing yoga?”
“Yeah,” I said. “Just as a general thing. Just curious.”
“I read about it online,” Valerie said. “I love it. I’m hoping to lose my bottoms soon enough.”
“Great,” I said.
“Does it bother you?”
“No,” I said. “Not at all. Just as long as you don’t mind me…”
“Hey, it’s just natural,” Valerie said. “You have the same parts as me, right?”
“That’s true,” I said.
Valerie walked into the kitchen.
Her boobs just hobbled around, free as could be.
I slipped out of the kitchen. “I’m going to go take this to my room. I have a headache.”
“Too much drinking last night?” Valerie asked.
“Something like that,” I said.
Too much emotion.
I spent the night pacing my room. Running through everything that happened with Reed. Then I finally called Toby and told him I was done with the band. He pleaded with me not to do that. He offered me more money. I told him I didn’t even take the check Reed gave to me.
Bottom line - being near Reed was toxic.
I never hated someone the way I hated him.
Yet in the same breath, I was never so attracted to someone the way I was to him.
And that attraction left my body feeling weak. The weakness was only me wanting to feel him. And feeling him meant feeling love for him.
To me there was no way I could both hate and love someone at the same time.
It didn’t make sense.
We were better off distanced.
And the distance was easy to get.
He was rich and famous.
He could stay in his part of the town.
I could stay in mine.
We’d never have to see each other again.
It would…
My phone screen lit up on my nightstand.
It was a text from Jess.
Work. I’m coming to get you.
I rolled my eyes.
Work.
Another day of dressing up and singing.
But at least I was doing it my way.
I was surviving on my own.
And… you know what… fuck Reed and FILTHY LINE.
Maybe I could slip Toby a call, text or demo of me and the girls singing.
The four of us could really kick some ass.
I drank my coffee and took a hot shower.
Jess texted me ten more times, pissed that I was taking my time.
She refused to come inside because she didn’t like Valerie.
Not that I could blame Jess since Valerie was walking about topless.
Once I was dressed, I hurried out of the apartment and Jess sat in her car, smoking a cigarette.
She beeped the horn at me.
I waved my middle fingers at her.
Everything was normal.
“Tell me why I can’t drive,” I said as I got into the car.
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “We can talk.”
“Talk?”
“Just shut up, Abby,” Jess said.
She flicked her cigarette out the window and backed up.
She drove fast like she always did.
“How’s life?” Jess asked.
“Don’t ask,” I said.
“That good?”
“How’s your life?”
“Same as always. Sasha was up my ass about trying new things. She has an idea to do a full show for birthday parties.”
“A show?”
“Yeah,” Jess said. “Costumes. Characters. Like a fucking play.”
“I’m not an actress,” I said.
“I think she gets ahead of herself,” Jess said. “She’s good at that stuff though. She should run a company or something.”
“Or the four of us could get into a studio and become famous.”
“How are you going to pull that off?”
“I have contacts,” I said with a grin.
Jess laughed. “Right. Contacts.”
“I…” I looked around. “Where are we going?”
“For a ride.”
“Where?”
“Nowhere,” she said.
“Jess…” I sighed. “You said there was work.”
“There’s no sign of Sasha or Rae. And why wouldn’t you drive? You’re so easy to set up.”
“Set up? What the hell does that mean?”
Jess grinned. “You could hate me for the rest of your life.”
“What did you do, Jess?” I asked.
“I called him back,” Jess said.
“What?”
“He called me and left a message. I called back. I had to.”
“Who called you?”
Jess looked at me. “Reed.”
My heart sank. “Pull over.”
“No.”
“I’ll jump out of the car while it’s moving.”
“You’ll kill yourself.”
“And you’ll have to live with it.”
“I’m not pulling over,” Jess said. “I’m not slowing down. I’m taking you to where he said.”