“You’re five minutes early,” I countered over my shoulder without looking back as I kept running straight back to the kitchen to put my jacket on. After tying the thin belt around my waist, I grabbed my handbag and rushed back to Jack. “I’m ready,” I mumbled, a little out of breath. My eyes were down as I was struggling to open the front zipper on my bag so I could throw my phone in. When it was done and I finally looked up, all the white noise coming from the city outside my door seemed to disappear. I couldn’t think of anything intelligible to say.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
My favorite curse word was the only thing that came to my mind, and I didn’t think it would be appropriate to say out loud in this situation.
Jack was wearing black slacks, which wasn’t anything surprising, but it was definitely the first time I was seeing him without a button-up shirt on. Instead, he was wearing a thin grey sweater with the arms slightly pushed up, giving me a view of the watch on his wrist.
A simple grey sweater and a watch had rendered me completely speechless. Like the jackass I was, I let my eyes wander from his fitted sweater to his belt and down to his black shoes. His face was just as it always was: same sharp jawline, same deep blue eyes, same rough stubble, a no-nonsense look in his eyes and the usual frown between his eyebrows. His hair looked like it had been roughly raked back with his hands with some sort of matte product.
Overall, he looked…okay. Fine, maybe a bit more than okay.
Staring into his eyes, wanting to play it safe, I waited for him to say something. I didn’t want to give it away too much that I might actually be attracted to him.
“Something wrong?” he asked.
I shook my head.
He studied me some more. “Ready then?”
I nodded, not saying a word.
“What’s wrong with you?”
I released a long sigh. “Nothing is wrong with me. What’s wrong with you?”
His stare intensified, so before I could get myself in trouble, I reached past him and opened the door, lightly bowing like an idiot who didn’t know what to do with herself and gesturing for him to leave. He stood there for another moment then, shaking his head at me, walked out. Taking care of the lights and pushing in the code to the alarm, I locked everything up and closed the door. Resting my forehead against it, I quietly murmured to myself and faced Jack, who was waiting for me with his hands in the pockets of his pants just a few steps ahead. I looked down the street a short ways and saw his car waiting for us.
As soon as I was next to Jack, he walked ahead and opened the door for me. I got in and scooted to the other end. “Hi, Raymond. I’m sorry for making you wait.”
Jack got in after me and closed the door. I was fairly sure Raymond was the only person who knew about our fake marriage. He had been our only witness at city hall, and even if he hadn’t been there, there was no reality where he would believe we were a newly married couple who were crazy in love after seeing us together for the last two weeks.
Since I was looking at the rearview mirror, I saw his small but genuine smile. “It’s all good. We didn’t wait for too long.”
I smiled back.
See, I thought as I gave Jack side eye. Why can’t you be like Raymond and smile at me just once or twice?
He started talking to Raymond and then we were on the way to our destination. I closed my eyes and breathed in, only to be assaulted by Jack’s cologne.
Dear God.
Dear God! That was all I could think of as I slowly let it all out and tried not to breathe much. His other cologne, the one I’d smelled on him every day for the last two weeks, was not as deep and musky as this one. This one would pretty much knock anyone off their ass and make them start salivating, fake wife or not. I pushed the button on the armrest to roll the window down a bit and let a little fresh air snap me out of my idiocy.
“How far away is it, Raymond?” I asked when I found my voice again. “The restaurant, I mean.”
“Half an hour, maybe a little more, Mrs. Hawthorne.”
I groaned on the inside and looked at Jack. “Did you change your cologne?”
“Why?”
“I’m not sure if I like it.” I loved it. I loved it too much.
He rolled his watch around his wrist and looked away from me. “Too bad for you.”
How had I known he would say something along those lines? I faced the window and smiled. He was starting to grow on me. If I had learned one thing about Jack Hawthorne, it was how unwilling he was to make small talk, and since I wasn’t eager to spend almost an hour in silence, I decided I’d have to be the one to start talking. Yet, when I glanced at Jack and saw him sitting so relaxed and looking out his window, I couldn’t come up with any interesting topics. I thought I was really good at pushing his buttons, but for some reason, I decided the cologne comment was enough for our car ride.
Giving up on every idea of small talk that came after that, I rested my temple on the cold glass window and closed my eyes. I didn’t know how many minutes passed in silence, but when I heard Jack’s soft voice, I forced my eyes to open with some difficulty, not having even realized I’d fallen asleep.
“Rose?”
I glanced to my right only to find him watching me carefully. The car wasn’t moving, so apparently I’d dozed off for longer than I’d thought. “Are we there?” I covered my mouth with the back of my hand and yawned.
His frown smoothed out and he shook his head. “We’re at a stoplight, almost there. You’re tired.”
At least that was better than You look awful. You’re tired was just a fact and I could live with that. “The makeup didn’t hide it enough, then,” I muttered. I was a whole lot of things, not just tired. I dropped my head back and took a deep breath. “Sorry for dozing off.”
The light turned green.
“I take it you didn’t get any sleep last night either?”
“I did, actually—five hours this time. I’m hoping tonight is the night I’ll sleep my usual amount.”
Two police cars with their sirens blaring passed us and my eyes followed them.
“Are you sure you’re up for this dinner?” Jack asked when it was quieter—as quiet as New York got.
Sitting up straighter, I turned to him. “Of course. I won’t disappoint you, Jack.” At least I wouldn’t make things worse, I was sure of that much. If all else failed, I’d just be silent and moody like Jack, and they’d think we were a good fit.
The frown came back in full force. “That’s not what I asked.”
“No, I know, but I’m up for it. I got ready, and I’m here. I just wanted you to know…that I wouldn’t disappoint you.”
After we shared an awkwardly long look as the passing city lights illuminated his face, we both fell silent.
Too soon, Raymond stopped the car and I looked out the window. We were parked in front of the restaurant where we would meet with Jack’s partners.
“Try to look half alive at least,” Jack said.
It was going to be a complete disaster. They were never going to believe we were in love. There was no way.
“Such pretty words. If you want half alive, that’s what you’ll get. If you had asked me to look fully alive, I would’ve definitely disappointed you. Half alive, though? You’re in luck.”