I know who she really wants, and it’s not me. It’s not Donovan, either. And it’s certainly not Adam.
It’s Nathan St. James.
But he’s not here and I just don’t care anymore.
I want her.
I have always wanted her and that’s the only thing that matters.
Our kiss continues. But I want us both naked. Now. So I nip her lip and stand back up, shrugging off my jacket and letting it drop to the floor at my feet.
She sits up too, squirming to get her arms out of her jacket, and then she’s tugging on her sweats as I kick off my boots and lift my t-shirt over my head. I let it fall to the floor on top of the jacket and just stand there as her eyes practically caress me as she studies the hard muscles of my stomach.
I reach for the hem of her t-shirt—“Let me help you with this”—and then lift it up over her head. She has no bra on now. No panties either. She is quickly naked and all I want to do is look at her body. Her firm, round breasts and tightly peaked nipples. Her small waist and the wide curve of her hips. The way she bites her lip when she’s thinking hard or very nervous.
She bites it now, conscious of my staring eyes.
Do I make her nervous?
Even if I do, I’m not gonna stop.
I was never allowed to look at her like this. From the day she first walked through this door until the day she walked out, everything about Indie Anna Accorsi was forbidden.
She tried a few times. Once she turned eighteen everything changed around here. And every once in a while she’d find me alone in the house and she’d sit in my lap and hug me. Try to force me to make a move.
But I didn’t.
I wouldn’t.
See, here’s the problem with my love for Indie.
She’s not just mine. She’s ours. And if I messed around with her, Adam would mess around with her too. Oh, I know what he’d say if he was here and this was a real conversation. He’d say nah, it wasn’t like that.
But it was like that. It was like that for all of us. Even self-righteous Donovan wanted her that way. He just knew he was last in line because he wasn’t around enough.
So Adam can pretend that he wouldn’t be jealous if Indie and I became a thing, but he would’ve. And then… I don’t know. I don’t know how that works.
It doesn’t, I guess. And that’s why I always ignored Indie’s hints.
But I can’t ignore it anymore. If she had not left that day, if Adam hadn’t left that day, if Donovan hadn’t left that day, if I had not been the only one to stay—we’d have already figured this out.
But they did leave. So this is where it all starts, I guess.
This is the next beginning.
Indie reaches for my jeans again, parting the fabric over my lower stomach, pulling open the zipper and tugging them down just over my hips until my cock springs out, fully erect and throbbing.
Her firm squeeze makes me close my eyes, and when I open them, she’s dropped to her knees in front of me.
“Sit on the bed.”
It comes out of her mouth like a command.
I don’t have to be told twice. I have been dreaming about her lips wrapping around my cock for four long years. I turn and sit as she scoots out of the way and repositions herself in front of me again. She tugs my jeans down my legs the rest of the way, pulls them off completely, and shoves them aside as she opens up my legs and fits her hot little body between my knees. Her palms caress the top of my thighs as she gazes up into my eyes and for a moment I wonder if she’s thinking about… him.
She smiles at me.
And I know she’s not. She doesn’t even remember him. Not really. She looked out the window across the room with a fucking scope and didn’t see a goddamned thing.
Nothing to see. Not anymore. But that’s beside the point.
The point is… she’s here with me now. Just me.
I lean my hands back on the bed to get a better view of her as she lowers her head and opens her mouth and then…
“Oh, fuck.” I moan it. Because her wet tongue slides up and down my shaft as she holds my cock gently in her palm. Then she squeezes it and slides her lips over the top of my head and bobs down until they seal around the upper part of my shaft.
I hold my breath. That’s how good that feels. And I know we just had sex last night, but it feels like it’s been several lifetimes since I’ve felt this good.
She begins sucking me off in earnest, taking me deep and holding me inside her for long moments of pure bliss. My fingers are tangled in her hair, gripping and twisting it all up. Urging her to keep going. She sucks on my head and pushes me into her throat and there is nothing I want more than to just come all over her fucking face.
But not yet. Not this time. Maybe next time.
I still want to be careful with her. She might be a sociopathic killer but she needs gentle guidance right now.
So I stand up. My cock falls out of her mouth and her eyes go wide as she looks up to meet my gaze.
“Please. Do not tell me no, McKay. I will—”
“Shut up, Indie. And lie on the bed.”
Sometimes that gentle guidance needs a firm hand.
She stands up with a smirk on her face, confident that I won’t be stopping before we really get started, and then crawls across her mattress and lies down flat.
I crawl over her legs and then knee them open. She obeys, bending her knees to maneuver around my legs, and then raises them up so her wet pussy is in full view when I look down.
My hands rest on the top of her knees and I push her legs back as I ease my cock up to her opening. She bites her lip again. Like the anticipation is killing her. And then she lets out a long rush of air as I enter her and push myself deep inside her pussy.
I lean forward and rest my hands on the mattress on either side of her head. Kiss her mouth. I want to kiss her mouth forever. Never let her take another breath that isn’t shared between us.
And then I fuck her. I fuck her with hard, penetrating thrusts. I fuck her until she begins to moan and wail. And then I fuck her soft, gently moving my hips as I whisper things into her mouth. Things like, “I fucking love you, Indie.” And, “You will never walk out on me again.” And, “You’re mine. And the only people I will ever share you with again are Donovan and Adam.”
Because even though I know it’s wrong, it’s already something we’ve done.
And she giggles at that last part. Like she’s forgotten everything that’s happened so completely, the thought of being shared between me, and Donovan, and Adam is actually something good.
When she’s close, when her body tenses and her back begins to arch, I come inside her. We climax in the very same moment. And I do not give one fuck that there’s no condom and I have no idea whatsoever if she’s on birth control.
She is mine.
And when Adam and Donovan get home, she will be ours.
Again.
Indie Anna Accorsi has always been ours.
It’s just the only fair way to do things.
Adam bought her, after all. Donovan kept her mostly sane. And I loved her. I loved her enough for all of us.
So do I mind? Do I care that I will never be allowed to possess her completely?
No.
I can share with them. But I can’t, and won’t, share with Nathan St. James. None of us will.