Bella didn’t seem to agree. “Pardon,” she said softly. “I need to stand where you are.”
He wasn’t a proper gentleman. He’d rarely even tried to be, but he knew that if anyone deserved an attempt, she did.
Stepping back, he gestured for her to take his place near the edge of the table.
A little nod was all he got in the way of gratitude before she bent over her cue, took her shot, and sent his ball spinning to the opposite end of the table. The grin she gave him over her shoulder made him want to let her take the next turn too.
Rhys positioned his cue stick but he couldn’t focus worth a damn. She was a terribly appealing distraction. Not only for all that was unsaid between them, but because the attraction that had sparked the moment he saw her again only built the longer he was close to her.
Rather than take his shot, he straightened and held her gaze. “Bella, I’m sorry for how I conducted myself that day years ago. I’m sorry I ruined your party.” He was on the cusp of saying more when she began to move.
To his shock, she made her way around the table and approached him. There was such intensity in her gaze, he readied himself for the slap she’d intended for Teasdale. If she chose to strike, he deserved it but he couldn’t help but notice she was carrying her cue.
“You’re not planning on using that on me, are you?”
Her lips trembled and her eyes glittered in the candlelight. Rhys steeled himself for tears.
But no sobs came. She wasn’t on the cusp of crying. She was bristling with frustration.
“Do you truly think I cared about my party?” She took one step closer. “I never wanted a grand event in the first place. I’ve never cared about parties the way you did.” She took another step, close enough for him to see the lovely pinpoint spray of color along the cut of her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. He’d always adored her freckles despite how much she loathed them.
Gorgeous. The thought came, unbidden and unexpected, and it surprised him.
Bella had always been pretty, but now she was something more. She exuded confidence in the way she carried herself, a poise that made the beauty she’d always possessed more pronounced. She’d become a formidable woman and the realization unsettled him. It was a bloody inconvenient time to realize his childhood friend had become a stunning beauty.
Rhys was used to women looking at him with heat in their gaze, but the sparks in Bella’s eyes weren’t appreciation.
“Do you know what I cared about?” she asked him. “Why I was so upset?”
He did know. He’d sensed in the months before her birthday that she’d begun to notice him in a different way. She’d always thought far too highly of him. But by that day on her birthday, he’d already begun earning a reputation among the ladies in the village. It was a side of himself she couldn’t know, and he’d been determined to protect her.
So he’d ignored her youthful crush, and that day she’d discovered who he really was.
She lifted her brows, impatient for his answer. Rhys sensed that what he said next could change everything between them. He knew now that she didn’t want his apology so much as for him to understand her feelings.
“You still don’t know.” There was real wonder in her voice and for a moment she sounded like the curious girl he’d once known.
But she looked like a fearless woman. Her gaze still fixed on his, she took a final step that brought them toe to toe.
Rhys licked his lips. Tried and failed not to glance at her mouth. She smelled like cinnamon and the autumn air, and he felt something he’d never felt for her before. Desire. The rush of it was so intense it left him breathless. Aching.
“You’re a fool, Rhys Forester.”
Yes, that sounded right. His name on her lips. He’d missed her calling his name and hadn’t realized how much until this moment.
“I am inarguably a fool.” He sometimes thought of himself as high society’s jester, but fool worked too. “I was thoughtless and I’m asking you to forgive me.”
In the beats of silence that followed his request, his breath caught in his throat. He watched her eyes, willing the steel he saw there to soften. She didn’t blink. He couldn’t look away. Nothing had mattered to him in a long while the way Bella’s response did.
He needed to know she didn’t hate him. He needed her forgiveness.
She blinked. One quick fan of her thick dark lashes. But she still said nothing as she watched him. Then, finally, she parted her lips and drew in a sharp breath.
“I can’t.” She spoke on a shaky whisper and even in those two quick syllables he heard emotion. Pain that he had caused.
“Please, Bella.” God, how he wanted to reach for her. She was close enough and he’d once touched her without so much as a thought. But as near as she stood, so close he could feel warmth radiating off her body, he sensed the chasm between them. “I’m not much good at groveling, but I’m willing to try.”
He’d never gotten on his knees with a woman for any purpose that didn’t include pleasure. But he’d accept a dose of humility for Bella’s sake.
Bending his knee, he began to lower himself in front of her.
“Don’t do that.” She slapped him on the shoulder, gripped his lapel, and pulled him back up. “I’m not saying I’ll never forgive you.”
Once he was on his feet again, she didn’t let go of his lapel. He leaned closer and color bloomed in her cheeks, but still she held him. Breath quickening, he told himself not to give in to the urge to reach for her or the more inappropriate urge.
He wanted to kiss her.
Too soon, the spell broke and she released him, taking one step back in retreat.
“I don’t need you to beg, only to understand. Back then, I’d become convinced that—” She caught herself and pressed her lips together.
He willed her to go on, even shifted his gaze from hers to let her know he’d simply listen. It was better if she said it than he.
But silence fell between them. Silence and a tension that made him yearn for the right words to make things better.
Bella bit down until her jaw ached. She’d come so close, but she couldn’t bring herself to admit how silly she’d been.
For years she’d imagined this moment.
His apology had come as easily as she expected. Deep down, she knew he’d never wished to hurt her. They’d always protected each other, defended each other, kept each other’s secrets.
But when she imagined this moment, she’d seen herself aloof. An impenetrable wall of calm and poise.
But now he was here. So close she could touch him. So near she could smell his familiar scent. And she wasn’t doing anything she’d vowed she would do. Her heart was betraying her, aching in that old familiar way. Not as sharp as it had once. A duller pain. But enough to make her realize this could never work.
Playing nice, resuming their friendship, pretending as if all the rest hadn’t passed between them—it was as impossible as walking downstairs and agreeing to marry a stranger.
His gaze was full of tenderness, yearning. “I was wrong, Bella.”
“I was foolish too.”
“You?” His mouth curved. “Even at eighteen, you were the least foolish young woman I’d ever known. I can’t imagine how clever you must be now.” He swallowed hard. “It’s bloody terrifying.”