I rush through the house to Kaylee’s bedroom, giving little thought to the man I just left and focusing all my energy on getting my dick to deflate.
Kaylee’s in tears when I open her door and get to her side.
I kneel beside her. “Bub, what’s wrong?”
“There were explosions.”
I pause. “Explosions?” Please don’t say poo explosions. Please don’t say poo explosions. I glance down and let out a relieved breath when I don’t see any evidence of an accident.
The joys of parenting.
“Mommy … Mommy’s on fire.”
I climb into bed next to her, hugging her so tightly I fear I might be suffocating her. “It’s okay. You were having a bad dream. It’s okay.”
She sobs on my shoulder while gasping between words. “Can … we … call … Mommy?”
I pat her hair and soothe her with shushing noises. “We’ll talk about it in the morning.”
Hopefully, when you’ve forgotten about this.
“Try to sleep now,” I whisper.
It takes a bit of consoling and rocking, but after about fifteen minutes, she drifts off.
I try not to let my emotions show when it comes to Maggie. Especially in front of Kaylee.
I respect the hell out of Kaylee’s mother, but it’s hard to explain to Kaylee why she’s gone. The times Maggie has been around have been short and confusing for Kaylee. And clearly, my explanations have frightened the poor girl into thinking her mommy is going to explode.
I’m going to have to make some calls in the morning and find out where the fuck Maggie is.
But first, I need to deal with Lyric.
Oh, shit. Lyric.
Now that I’ve had a chance to cool off, I’m dreading dragging my ass back to the studio because I know I’m going to have to tell him it was a mistake.
Or almost a mistake.
Getting that close to him was wrong.
Though, right now, I think my only error wasn’t diving in and kissing him before we got interrupted.
I have to go back down there and either pretend we didn’t nearly kiss—that I wasn’t hard for him before his lips even touched mine—or I have to face it head-on and tell him it can’t happen.
We can’t have that kind of relationship even if something has never felt so right before.
I don’t get to connect with people very often being who I am and doing what I do. When Eleven was together, it was even worse.
Lyric’s different.
And he’s so fucking talented.
After one song, I know we’d make a great team. Not just as producer and artist but as something more. Something I’ve never allowed myself to even contemplate because of Kaylee.
I trudge my way back through the house toward the studio and find Lyric on the couch along the back wall, but when I enter, he doesn’t even look up at me. Instead, he jumps to his feet.
“I should go. I was going to, and then I thought it’d be sucky to leave without saying anything, but I didn’t know what to write if I left you a note, and—”
“Lyric, please sit down.”
His gaze flicks up to mine. “Oh God, I’m fired, aren’t I?”
I snort. “Wouldn’t it be illegal for me to fire you after almost kissing you? That’s a sexual harassment suit the tabloids would love to get their hands on.”
“I would never—” Lyric looks like he’s freaking out.
“I know. Just, please sit? We can, uh, talk.”
Lyric nods and sits but runs his palms over his denim-clad thighs.
I sit on the opposite end of the couch, making sure to put some distance between us.
“Is Kaylee okay?” he asks, and I could kiss him for asking about her first. Not only because it delays the awkwardness that’s about to happen but because it shows he really does care about her.
“She had a nightmare. She has them sometimes.”
“About her mom.”
I cock my head at him.
He points to the baby monitor.
Oh, right. He heard everything.
“You’re really good with her,” Lyric says. “I know you think you have no idea what you’re doing sometimes, but you know what to do when it counts.”
“I’ve never loved anyone more in my whole life, but it’s hard. She is my number one priority.” I swallow hard as I look at him. “Which is why—”
I swear I see him physically deflate before he puts on a weak smile. “I understand. This was a lapse in judgment on my part.” He stands again. “You know, I thought the hardest thing about this job would be working for the hot straight guy. Then I found out you were …” He struggles to find a label because he respects me enough not to put one on me. “Well, yeah, anyway, I’m sorry I couldn’t control myself, and it will never happen again.”
His words feel wrong. They don’t sit right with me.
“Besides, I’m sure this happens all the time, right?” Lyric’s voice cracks. “I’m guessing bonding over recording is how you and Cash happened, so—”
“I feel like I should be offended, but I’m hoping you didn’t mean that the way it came out. That I almost-kiss all the acts I produce.”
“No! I mean, yeah, no, I don’t mean that at all. I’m trying to find justifiable reasons to chalk this up to a heated moment instead of …” Hazel eyes pierce mine.
“Instead of what?” I ask, my voice coming out a breathless mess.
Lyric’s throat bobs as he swallows. “It doesn’t matter. I should go.” He makes no move to leave.
I stand slowly and approach him even slower. “Lyric, I …”
I hate this.
Dismissing Cash was easy because I’m not the type of guy who needs someone or needs sex.
So why do I need Lyric to not walk out that door and leave right now?
“You don’t want to fuck things up for Kaylee,” Lyric says. “I get it.”
“She already loves you. If things didn’t work out … That’s why we should probably forget tonight ever happened. Well, apart from the kick-ass song.”
“Agreed.”
Yet, I don’t stop moving until my body presses against his. “There’s only one problem with that.”
“Mm?”
“I don’t think I can.”
Chapter Twelve
Lyric
The words are whispered along my skin, and I know I need to be the bigger person here. I need to walk away because Ryder is asking me to.
His number one priority is Kaylee. I need to respect that.
My number one priority should be keeping my professional life, personal life, and my connection to music all separate from Ryder.
Kissing him will mush all of them together, and I won’t be that guy.
Because realistically, there’s only one way this whole situation ends: badly.
“It’s already forgotten,” I say.
Disappointment makes me want to put the words back in my mouth and swallow them down, but I know I’m doing the right thing.
Ryder’s so close, so tempting.
I want to kiss him because I bet kissing him would be fun. But also, kissing him would be agony.