“If you stay,” I pointed out, “if you want to be a part of what we are, your parents will fund your buy-in to our resort. If not, no worries.”
They could run on their own. Or they could run with us.
“Thunder Bay is where you don’t have to hide,” I told them.
We were a family. We’d had the rug pulled out from under us a long time ago, but we weren’t changing. Everyone else would.
I just needed to hear a yes from them.
“I’ll let you think about it. Let’s head to Michael’s house,” I said, leading the way back to the cars. “We need food.”
“I’m not arguing with that,” Micah said. “I’m starving.”
And I smiled to myself.
If they were willing to stay through breakfast, then that wasn’t a no.
• • •
I didn’t stay. I dropped them at St. Killian’s where the cook had breakfast laid out, but then I saw the table bustling with everyone and parents and security and…
My heart plummeted, seeing little black heads of hair scurrying around the table.
Kids.
My chest cracked wide open, and I didn’t know which one was Madden and which one was Ivarsen, but I couldn’t stay.
I just… I couldn’t. I bolted, jumping back into Kai’s car and racing away, leaving my boys and Emmy behind, and spending the rest of the day taking care of the gazillion other things I had to do, so I didn’t think about everything I’d missed while I was away.
I’d known that, though, right? Both Banks and Winter had been pregnant when I went to Blackchurch. I’d known what was happening at home.
It was so hard to see their sons for the first time. I should’ve been there.
I hadn’t been there.
After burning a thousand calories at Hunter-Bailey where my membership was still current—thank you, Michael—I collected some clothes and belongings from Delcour, checked in with my bank and unfroze my accounts, made some more calls, took care of a couple of other minor tasks, and had a quick meeting at the White Crow.
The town was just as beautiful as ever. The Bell Tower still sat in ruins, the Cove still standing quiet from a distance, and Edward McClanahan’s grave was decorated with trinkets from the latest pilgrimage made by the current basketball team of Thunder Bay Prep. I drove around for a long time, past Emmy’s old house repeatedly, our old school a few times, and completely avoided the bridge where I’d almost drowned two years ago.
It wasn’t until my fifth pass through the neighborhoods surrounding the village, the sun setting and dusk rising, that I realized it was EverNight. “Man or a Monster” played on the radio as candles flickered in windows, the upstairs rooms that belonged to teenagers and children glowing bright with their offerings to Reverie Cross.
As night settled, and the chill seeped into my bones, I wanted warmth, and I wanted that scent I had on me last night.
Did her brother know we were in town? It wouldn’t be hard for him to know where to find her.
I veered toward St. Killian’s.
Climbing the cliffs, the sea air breezing through the car, I cruised down the blacktop road, past Damon’s house, Banks’s house, Michael’s parents’ house, and Rika’s mother’s house, speeding through the pillars with their gas lamps, and down the drive to St. Killian’s.
Candles glowed in every window, and I saw movement through the drapes upstairs as a thatch of grass sat in the center of the driveaway with a bowl of fire blazing high. Gravel crackled under the tires, and I pulled to a stop, exiting the car.
The drive in was gorgeous. This place was beautiful. They’d done a good job.
Music and laughter greeted me as soon as I opened the door, and I peered inside the dining room, the open floorplan pretty well preserved, except for the few walls they added here and there to give some rooms their privacy.
Winter sat in Damon’s lap as she and Alex laughed at whatever Rika was saying, the table strewn with notes, magazines, tuxes—for the wedding, I presumed—snacks and flowers. Banks and Kai must’ve gone home, and Micah texted me earlier to let me know they were heading to the apartment for the night.
I had no idea where Misha and Ryen were, but they’d probably gone to his house or hers in Falcon’s Well, not far from here. Michael walked in from the kitchen with a platter of sandwiches, devouring one as he walked.
But I slipped back and away before anyone saw me.
A coo drifted off behind me, a flutter hitting my stomach as I turned and crossed the foyer, into the ballroom.
The chandeliers dimmed and the chairs and sofas spread out around the room, and I looked over and saw a playpen with a spiky black head of hair sticking out the top.
Walking over, I looked down at the blue-eyed boy with his father’s eyebrows and his mother’s long lashes, my chin fucking quivering because he was so damn cute.
Reaching down, I picked him up and held him in my arms, his little body feeling lighter than air.
Laughter went off in the dining room. His awesome baby smell made me dizzy, and needles pricked my throat as tears welled in my eyes.
I shook with silent sobs, looking at his beautiful face as tears streamed down my own. Damon had done all this without me. He was doing so well—without me.
I should’ve been here when the kid was born. I should know Madden.
“I’m taking you trick or treating next year, okay?” I whispered down at him. “I’m taking you every year. I’m getting my own house, and I’m going to be at every one of Michael’s games and every one of your mom’s performances and I’ll be giving you the biggest presents for every birthday.” I leaned my cheek into his forehead, just sitting there. “I’ll even blow off your bedtime when they leave you with me for date night.”
Ivar, Mads, and the baby Winter was carrying now would never know that I was absent.
Setting him back in his bed, I pressed my lips to his head and handed him his stuffed snake, smiling to myself as I remembered the Godzilla that I got Em. I wondered if she still had it.
Heading to the back of the house, I descended the stairs into the catacombs, seeing Rika had talked Michael out of covering the uneven stone stairs with wooden ones.
How long had it been since I’d been here? The night Damon, Winter, and I went off the bridge?
I walked along the hardwood floors, fake flames flickering on the walls inside their sconces and knowing there were a dozen or so rooms down here. I wasn’t exactly sure where they put her, but I tried the first room I came to and twisted the handle.
The door gave way, opening wide, and I stepped inside the dark room, light from the corridor spilling in and revealing the body on the bed, under the sheet.
“Will?” she said, turning over.
I looked down as she rubbed her eyes, seeing the lacy black bra under the jean overalls she wore, my pulse instantly pumping in my neck and my dick twitching with life.
Fuck. I loved her in overalls.
I gazed at her olive skin, and the brown hair on her head hanging down her arms. The plump chest and the pink lips.
And the rope that was around her wrists this morning back around her neck, the slack hanging between her breasts and inside her overalls.
I smiled.
Sitting up, she scooted over to me, and I stood in front of her, looking down at my Little Trouble who hadn’t changed a bit from how badly she pissed me off and got me hard in high school.