“And pickiness, and willingness to wait for the right one.” Kenneth’s glance at Chrissy was hard to miss, and for a familiar moment I ached.
For years, I’d wished I could share what they did. And then I remembered that I did now, and suddenly everything was new and exciting again, and I wanted to soar.
I wanted to brag about Rusty, not apologize for loving him.
“That’s right.” Chrissy looked at me again. “So embrace the wrinkles. They come with benefits—just like boyfriends. Right?”
I blushed. “Yeah.”
“He’s good for you, I can tell,” Chrissy said with a wise nod. “But, Tom… we never had the chance to really fall in love. You’ve never let yourself fall for anyone, have you?”
I swallowed hard and nodded nervously, not sure where she was going with this. Hopefully she didn’t resent me all of a sudden, after years of our shared understanding.
“So, for the first time you aren’t in control. Sure, we love each other, but it was never a sweeping romance.”
Oh, shit. She was right.
For the first time, my heart was leading the way, and it was more than being new to being out and gay. It was being new to romance.
“Go with it,” Chrissy urged me, leaning in and laying her fan down. “This is your time to shine. And I can’t wait to meet him tonight. Anyone who loves you, I already love. Okay?”
I nodded, the corners of my eyes prickling with heat, and leaned in to hug Chrissy for a few long seconds.
She always knew just what I needed… and so did Rusty, if I could trust myself to let go and get swept away by him.
“I’ll see you in an hour or so,” I told her with a smile when I finally pulled away. “I have to go pick up Rusty.”
“Scram, my knight in shining armor,” Chrissy teased me, straightening my jacket and tie before she patted my chest and rose to see me out. “Go get your Prince Charming.”
I left with one more hug, and I barely remembered the drive to Rusty’s place, I was so high on confidence and excitement.
It didn’t fade even as I trotted up the staircase to Rusty’s little studio apartment and knocked on the door.
“Just a moment!”
No surprise there. Rusty didn’t seem great at showing up on time—but I didn’t blame him. He was always busy, always flitting between three different things. Ah, young energy. I could take a lesson.
I waited patiently as usual, smiling to myself. So what if he was a little bit unprepared for life?
When Rusty finally pulled open the door, panting for breath and ruffled, I grinned at him and admired the sight. He was fully dressed this time, but he looked like he’d just been running around turning the place inside-out.
But he was beaming at me like the hottest man alive, looking me up and down appreciatively. “Well, hello!”
He looked like a tall drink of handsome himself, all dressed up in a white suit jacket like mine, with a pink handkerchief in his pocket. Clearly Alec had dressed him to match me, which meant Rusty had gone to him… probably at the beginning of this week.
And that left only one conclusion: Oh my God, he rushed off to brag about me. My ego was the size of the moon itself.
“Hey, sweetheart,” I answered, secretly delighted to use the pet name—and even happier when Rusty seemed to like it. “Your ride is here.”
Rusty grabbed me by the tie and gently pulled me inside, winking at me. “Oh, yes he is,” he purred, leaving me in no doubt that he meant that in an entirely sexual way.
I blushed and slapped his ass playfully. “You behave and you might find out. How do I look? Good enough to wow them all?”
Rusty wriggled with excitement. “You’re gorgeous no matter what you’re wearing,” he said. “But yes, you’re extra gorgeous today.”
I grinned. “And you, my love,” I said casually, “look like you need a kiss. Come here.”
He went willingly as I pulled him in, sliding my hands up his back and kissing him with an open mouth and all the naughty intentions in the world.
Then he squeaked against my mouth, bouncing onto his toes and nearly smacking my nose with his chin.
I pulled back in a hurry to protect my face as he jumped. “Whoa!”
Rusty gasped and clutched my jacket lapels. “Sorry! I just got excited! You said love, and I love you, and you love me, and love is… lovely.”
Oh, yes, it is, I thought. The sunshine in my chest matched the happiness on his face, but he was also clearly mortified about his vehement reaction and I didn’t want that.
So I chuckled gently and kissed him until he stopped blushing. Until his blushes turned to a whole different reason, and he whimpered, soft and needy, against my mouth.
“Later,” I promised softly, running my nails up his back under his jacket.
Rusty moaned and swayed into me. “I hope so.”
When I finally let go of him, we headed for the stairs and my car. It wasn’t until I climbed in that the reality finally hit me.
My nerves started to climb up my spine, gripping my throat until I couldn’t breathe. It was one thing to be confident when talking about it to Chrissy, but it was a whole different thing to actually be ready.
After just a week of knowing Rusty, was I ready to show off who I was, and who I loved? Was everyone around me ready, too? What would happen if someone took offense tonight?
I was on my way to the rehearsal of my daughter’s wedding, where I’d introduce my new partner to my whole extended family for the first time. And suddenly, I wasn’t quite sure this was the right move.
This was going to be a day to remember.
Chapter Thirteen
All the worst parts of weddings.
Rusty, day 6
I’d expect anyone to be on edge watching their daughter rehearse marrying a nutjob like Jason. The whole time we went over where we’d stand and sit, I kept one eye on Tom, and sure enough he looked like he was about ready to explode.
Once Dill got over the shock of seeing me on Tom’s arm, there had been some last-minute chair rearrangement. Chrissy and Kenneth sat in the same row as Tom, while I sat directly behind Tom.
I ought to mentally thank Dill for that choice. I didn’t want to take up a spot in the parents’ aisle, right?
But instead, as I watched Hugh smugly putting his arm around Rose’s shoulders as they watched, I felt more isolated than ever.
I didn’t belong here. I didn’t know anyone here aside from Dill.
My little brother was in full-on planner mode. I’d never seen him like this, giving directions and answering questions like a boss. Despite how much of a third wheel I felt, I was proud of him.
But God, it was hard to sit still and watch as Tom walked down the aisle with Beth, and everyone practiced their entrances and exits like some kind of weird pantomime.
Jason looked even more miserable than usual, but every time Beth looked at him, he pasted on a big, fake smile.
Just hang on for the wine, I told myself, wishing I’d snuck some vodka into a water bottle.
It was a beautiful venue, but it couldn’t do anything for my mood. White cloth was draped along the walls, and high, arched ceilings were lit with chandeliers. But studying the decor would only pass so much time.