‘I suspect you didn’t so much ruin her life as make it more complicated,’ she said quietly. ‘That man who’s after her is ruining her life, if anyone is. Your article certainly didn’t help her state of mind, but I’d say you’re lower in the pecking order of villains.’
He swallowed hard, his eyes burning. He’d cried so much already. Like a kid. Like a stupid kid. I am a stupid kid. ‘I don’t want to be a villain,’ he whispered. ‘I want to do right.’
She bit off a thread and lifted her work to the light, examining it. ‘Then do right.’
‘How?’
‘Jeff, you’re a smart young man. Brilliant, even. A whole lot smarter than I ever was, for sure. But brains aren’t everything. They aren’t even half of what makes a person good.’
He blinked, then swiped at his wet face impatiently. ‘What makes a person good?’
‘Helping other people. Integrity. Kindness.’ She turned to face him. ‘Why did you want to write that article to begin with, son?’
‘I wanted to explore the victims. Not the dead women. Lots of people are talking about them. I wanted to know how someone . . . I don’t know. Recovered? Can a person recover from that kind of experience?’
‘Good question. Why did you focus on Mercy Callahan?’
‘Because of the three, she was the quietest. Almost like a ghost. Almost like she hadn’t been abducted at all. The two other women have talked to the media. Heck, Daisy Dawson is the media. She’s got a radio show and everything.’
‘What does Daisy do with that radio show?’
He opened his mouth, then closed it. What did she do with it? ‘She plays music in the morning. She’s cheerful, I guess. But she also talks about charities and ways . . .’ He closed his eyes. ‘Ways that the community can help other people. You’re way smarter than me, Mom.’
His mother chuckled quietly. ‘Say that into my phone. I want to make it my ringtone.’
He laughed with her, feeling a little bit right for the first time in a long time. ‘I listen to Daisy’s program sometimes,’ he said. ‘She goes by Poppy, you know.’
‘I know. I’ve been listening to her morning show for months. I recognized her yesterday when she was busy keeping that FBI agent boyfriend of hers from ripping your head off.’
He was surprised. ‘You didn’t say anything.’
‘I didn’t think it was the right time to ask for an autograph,’ she said dryly. ‘I was busy keeping Detective Sokolov from ripping your head off.’
He sighed. ‘I guess I deserved that.’
‘Yep,’ she said, popping the ‘p’. ‘You really did. But not all of it. You deserved for them to be furious with you. You didn’t deserve to be knocked around. Even though I understood why that cop did it. But back to Daisy. She uses her platform for good, Jeffy. I’ve heard her talk about pet adoptions and raising money for homeless kids. She’s brought on self-defense experts and a few weeks ago even brought on her sponsor from AA and they talked about addiction and staying sober. She uses her platform for good.’
‘I don’t have a platform. Not anymore. I mean, I quit the Gabber, but even if I hadn’t, it’s closed down.’ His boss was probably even facing charges for knowingly posting a video of a sexual assault. Which was warranted, the sleazy bastard.
I am so glad I kept all my records. If he hadn’t, he might have been arrested, too.
His mother chose a new color of embroidery floss and threaded her needle. ‘Last I checked, that story you wrote had over a hundred thousand hits. People are even watching your YouTube channel.’
He thought his eyes might be bugging out. ‘You know about my YouTube channel?’
She drew a rueful breath. ‘I do now. Let’s just say your aunt Patricia has explained it all to me.’
And likely embarrassed his mother in the process. ‘I’m sorry, Mom.’
‘I know you are. You got in over your head, Jeffy. But now you’re on the shore and you have a chance to try swimming the river again. You know the pitfalls and the risks. You can make different choices. And, if you make good ones, you can at least help someone else, even if Mercy Callahan never forgives you.’
His gaze shot to hers. ‘You knew that was what was really bothering me, didn’t you?’
She gave him a knowing smile. ‘Like I said, I’m not as smart as you, but I have raised you. I’ve seen you checking your messages and I know you’ve started to call the Sokolovs’ house more than once.’
Jeff took her phone and started a voice memo. ‘This is April seventeenth and Geri Bunker is way smarter than me.’ He handed her phone back to her. ‘For your ringtone.’
She swallowed hard, like she was trying not to cry. ‘Make the call, Jeff. Talk to Mrs Sokolov. She seemed very nice. Ask her how Miss Callahan is doing. And ask her for ideas on how you can best use this platform of yours to do some good, before your fifteen minutes of fame are over and you go back to being a regular college kid who doesn’t wash his socks.’
He started to get defensive about his having fifteen minutes of fame, but knew deep down she was right. He sighed dramatically. ‘I bet Ronan Farrow never has days like this. You know who Ronan Farrow is, right?’
She tapped her phone and showed him her ebook app. ‘I’ve read both his books. You told me last year that you wanted to do investigative journalism like he does, so I’ve familiarized myself with his work.’ She pocketed her phone. ‘If you ever meet him someday, you can ask him if he has days like this. And then you can get his autograph for me.’
She’s been listening to me. Overcome, Jeff leaned over and pecked her cheek. ‘Love you, Mom.’
Her eyes glistened. ‘Love you too, son. Now make the call.’
He stared at his phone for a long moment, then shook his head. ‘I’m scared to. What if she hates me? I don’t want anyone to not like me, much less hate me.’
‘I think a lot of people dislike Ronan Farrow,’ she said lightly. ‘They’re probably the people whose crimes he’s exposed.’ She grew serious then, leveling him with the same stare she’d given when delivering the pre-punishment this-hurts-me-more-than-you speech when he was a kid. ‘Not everyone is going to like you, son. And good people don’t do good so that they’ll win popularity contests. They do good because it’s the right thing to do.’
He made a face. ‘Do I get points for doing good even when I’m scared?’
She smiled. ‘Don’t know about points, but I will make you a pie.’