He nods softly. “I want that for you too.”
“You do?”
“Yes, of course.”
I smile softly at him.
“But I also want to help you. I want you to let me help you. The way Drew did. You can always pay me back.”
I pick up my wineglass. “Sam, it’s different with you.”
“Why?”
“Because Drew treated it like a business deal. You would just be doing it because…you love me.”
He gives me an impossible look. “What’s wrong with that?”
“It’s the principle of the whole thing,” I say, my voice rising a few octaves.
He lets out a defeated breath and says, “Okay, then. No studio.”
“Sam…” I reach for his hand and hold it in my lap. “I love that you want to help me. But I want to figure out how to do it on my own. Especially now.” I shake my head and explain, “Everything’s different now…I’m different.”
He gives me a sincere look and asks, “How?” Before I can answer, he adds, “Besides the fact that you’ll freely take your clothes off and run around the beach with me now.”
I laugh. “Well, yes, there’s definitely that. But, I don’t know, I’m just not who I was with Drew. Being here these last few weeks, without distractions, learning new things about you and rediscovering all the things I already loved…about you, about us…” I smile and say, “I’m me when I’m with you, Sam. Who I always was, deep down. The me who isn’t afraid to stand on her own two feet. I want other people to know her too.”
“Then they will.”
I smile and lean back against the pillows in the cabana and stare at the sparkly sky.
Sam leans back beside me. “So, besides the studio, are there other stipulations to me spending money on you that I should know about?”
“Sam, I love that you want to give me things and take me to amazing places like this. But I told you, I’m yours, free and clear. You earned your money, not me. I’m not going to let you go bankrupt spending it on me.”
He pulls his eyebrows together. “Luc, I don’t think you understand exactly how much money I have.” He gives me a contented look, but it makes me uneasy. “I couldn’t spend it all in this lifetime or the next.”
“Oh.” My mouth suddenly feels dry. Maybe it’s the wine.
“I mean, I guess I technically could, but I never would. I’m smart with my money, and I’ve made good investments.”
I give a tentative smile. “It’s still your money. Not mine.”
He nods thoughtfully and his face grows serious again, but then he reaches for my hand and the corners of his mouth turn up, setting his eyes alight. “Well, I guess I’ll just have to do something about that then.”
I laugh and shake my head. “Sam, I was literally engaged to someone else less than a month ago. We’re not getting married.” I smile and put my hand on his cheek. “Not yet anyway.”
“Well, maybe we could get a head start by you moving in with me when we get back.”
I laugh again, unable to escape the power of his dimples, or the joy that’s filling my chest. “You want me to move in with you already?”
“Yes,” he says certainly.
“Don’t you think we should give it a little more time?”
“For what?”
“I don’t know. To get to know each other again. I mean, we only just got back together. And what would people say?” Thoughts of the media and Drew and Janice bounce around my head, squandering my happiness.
He sits up and drops his elbows to his knees. “Lucy, I don’t care what people say. And what do you mean? We’ve known each other our whole lives. Besides, we’ve technically been living together for the last twenty days.”
“Well, as much as I hate to admit it, I do care what people say. People can be judgmental. I don’t need rumors derailing my career right now. The last thing I want is to be known as your gold-digging girlfriend.”
He laughs softly and fights a smile. “So you think moving in with me makes you a gold digger?”
“Well, maybe a freeloader.”
“Okay, I’ll tell you what. If you move in with me, I’ll let Jean-Luc go and you can be in charge of buying all the groceries. It will actually save me money.”
I smile softly. “Have you even considered that you might not like living with me? I’m not the tidiest person in the world.”
“I’ve noticed,” he says, cutting his eyes at me.
“Uhh.” I laugh and shove his arm lightly. “We’re on vacation, okay?”
He laughs and shakes his head. “You never did pick your clothes up off the floor, even when we were kids.”
He really does know me. It makes me smile. “Well, you’re freakishly tidy, okay. When did that start?”
“Prison. When I got out, I was a lot more careful with my belongings, because I didn’t have anything for three years.”
“Oh.” I drop my head and fight the familiar guilt that squeezes my chest whenever he talks about his time in prison.
He pulls me over to him and wraps his arms around me. “I love that you’re messy. It’s part of who you are. And I want all of you, Lucy. Even the messy parts.”
I nod against his chest. “I felt like I had to hide the messy parts for a really long time.”
“Not with me. You never have to hide with me, Lamb. I love everything about you. No amount of time or space will change that. So, please, move in with me. I want the first thing I see in the morning to be your face…with your messy hair, in our messy room.”
I laugh softly. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
I tilt my chin up and smile at him. “Yes, I’ll move in with you, Sam.”
He kisses the top of my head and hugs me tight. “That makes me so happy.”
“Me too,” I say softly, pushing away encroaching thoughts of the media and Drew and Janice. They’ll all have something to say, but nothing is more important than Sam’s happiness. Or mine.
Chapter 4
Lucy
Sebastian!” I stand on my tiptoes and wrap my arms around his neck.
“Hello, gorgeous!” He pulls me back by my shoulders and smiles at me. “Seriously, you look amazing.” He takes my hands and inspects my face and arms. “A little Sam, I mean sun, looks good on you.”
I laugh and arch an eyebrow. “Maybe a little of both.”
He sighs and removes his burgundy Burberry scarf from around his neck, which he reserves for the month of November. “You know I can’t wait to hear all about it—I want details—but first, I have one hundred and one things to go over with you.” He hands me a paper cup of coffee and takes my hand. “Come on.”
I sip it as he drags me to the back of the studio, reluctantly lifting the Sam veil I’ve been blissfully hiding behind for the last three weeks. Paradise was wonderful, but it’s back to reality.
I did miss my latte macchiato.
And Sebastian.
I smile when we reach my very organized office, which I’ve avoided since I arrived twenty minutes ago. I chose to spend the morning reacquainting myself with my paintings, especially those that technically no longer belong to me since being sold at my exhibit last month. “You’ve been busy,” I say, eyeing my shelves.