“I was thinking about touching you. My fantasy was nothing compared to this.”
I think I whimper through the pleasure.
“You’re going to come again for me, aren’t you, my sweet dirty girl? Give it to me.”
For the third time, an orgasm tears through me, this time without much warning. It’s like his words were my release and my body let go on his command. Through my tremors and shudders, I hear him groan. His thumb brushes my clit one last time before his hand slows and stops completely. The loss of him sends an ache through me as he withdraws his fingers. Looking between the valley of my spread legs, I catch him tuck his two wet digits into his mouth as he stares at me hotly. I collapse on the bed with a groan, panting and trying to slow my racing heart.
“You’re going to be the death of me,” he whispers against the crease of my thigh. He burrows his face deeper as he lightly drops kisses against my sweat-dampened skin. I’m too wrecked to speak. He just took my body to heights I never knew existed, and I’m paralyzed from pleasure. My limbs are heavy, sated, and I let my eyelids droop, powerless to stop them.
You have that backward, I want to tell him, you’re going to be the death of me.
The bed dips, and then I’m airborne, startling my eyes open. Alex cradles me to his bare chest and settles me on the pillows.
“Let me get some pants on, and I’ll be right back.” He disappears into the hallway, gracing me with his beautifully naked backside. Moments later, he returns with a two-liter of pop and a pizza box.
“You must be a magician.” I raise an eyebrow at him as he sets the items on the bed. I don’t waste any time flipping open the lid and snagging a slice.
“Not quite,” he answers from the closet. When he returns, he’s got a nice pair of gray sweats low on his hips. These look good, but I wouldn’t mind him being naked just a bit longer.
“You just interrupted my plan with one of your own.” He smirks at me when he catches me staring.
“I woke up, and I was lonely,” I answer shyly. Alex joins me on the bed and nudges me with his shoulder before taking his own slice.
“I only meant to leave you for ten minutes, fifteen tops. I ordered the pizza while you were asleep on our drive home. I left you on the couch so that I could wake you to eat. I didn’t want you going to bed hungry.”
I toss my mangled crust back into the box. “I wondered why you left me on the couch. I thought you had a rule about me sleeping there.”
“I do,” he responds instantly. “I want you with me.”
His dark eyes capture mine and I search them, wondering, hoping if this all means what I think it means.
I’m the first to look away as I take another slice. “Can I ask you something?”
“Shoot.”
“Well, not so much a question…” I trail off, unsure how to continue.
“Shelby.” His voice is low and immediately pulls my attention to him. “Just say what’s on your mind.”
“Right.” I take a bite and wait until I’ve finished chewing. “I want to help my friends. Those other girls. I can’t stop thinking about them. I don’t want to put you or Elias out any more than I already have, but I don’t know how I’m just supposed to move on and leave them behind. I don’t think I can.” I take another bite and toss my wasted crust.
“Things have been wonderful lately. I feel stronger. I’m less afraid. Knowing things I do now, I don’t think I can pretend they don’t exist because, for the better part of two years, they’re all I had.”
“You’re my number one priority,” he states.
“But—”
“That means that I’m going to do whatever I can to get you what you need.”
“I don’t understand.”
“If you need to help those girls as part of your healin’, then I’m going to do what I can to help you with that. But Shelby, make no mistake. It’s going to be fuckin’ dangerous.”
I swallow hard at the implication. What’s worth more? I don’t know if I were pressed to choose that I could make that choice. How can I not help the women who are where I used to be? But how do I risk the man I love to do it?
Chapter Seventeen
Sin
“Yo! Quit with the nookie in the corner and grab me a drink. Your pop taught you better than that!” Earl’s voice rings loud above the music in the bar.
I cut him an irritated glance over my shoulder, keeping my hands tight to Shelby’s waist.
“We’re havin’ a discussion. You’ll have to wait,” I bark.
As I turn back around, I catch Elias seated at the corner, watching us with a question on his face. I suppose we look damn cozy compared to any other time he’s seen the two of us together. My shoulders tense as old insults I spewed flit through my mind. Okay, yeah, his confusion makes sense.
But can he really blame me?
I wouldn’t if things went the other way. That’s not a thought I want to allow into my mind. Now or ever fucking again.
Shelby’s giggle brings my attention back around.
“What’s funny?”
She quirks an eyebrow. “You.”
“How the fuck am I funny?”
She laughs harder at my stern tone before she sobers. “I used to be afraid of you.”
Ah, hell. Her admission is like a punch to the gut.
Seeing my face, she amends. “Not that you’d hurt me. You just speak so unfiltered; I never knew what you’d say next. Now,” she lifts a shoulder and shrugs, “I can see there was never anything to fear.”
“Oh, really?” I taunt, leaning in close so our noses nearly touch. “I think you should still be plenty afraid.”
Her eyes drop to my lips. “Why?”
I lower my voice. “Because I want to do things to you.” My tongue touches my lower lip. “Unspeakable, dirty things.”
The music and voices drown out her sound, but I swear she whimpers.
And fuck, do my balls ache just thinking of all the things I want to do. Her pussy was an appetizer, and I’m ready for the main course. The question is whether or not she’s ready. It’s been two weeks since I had a taste, and we’ve taken it slow at my insistence. I hold her at night while she sleeps in my bed, and her thighs cradle mine on the back of my bike. I take her pretty mouth every chance I can, and we’ve done the heavy petting, but that’s as far as things have progressed.
I’m an experienced man. I’ve fucked my fair share of women. But that’s not who Shelby is or who we ever will be together.
She’s not just some pussy.
A faceless girl.
She’s becoming my whole entire world wrapped in a beautiful bow.
And if that means I have to wait to experience all she has to offer, I’d wait a damn near decade if I had to.
Because I’d rather take my own life than ever make her feel what those motherfuckers made her feel. If for one second, we start to go down that path, I would never forgive myself for putting her there.
I’d spend eternity in hell.
I brush my thumb over her puckered pout and quickly replace it with my lips before pulling away.
“Duty calls. Don’t go far.”