Branch stepped back, letting me step around him and into Frankie’s arms. I resisted the urge to stop and gape at him, instead heading to the comforting arms of my best friend. He whispered rapid Portuguese into my hair, of which I only picked up like ten percent but made me feel better anyway.
At least until I noticed Beau and Dylan at the end of the hall, twin looks of concern on their faces. I groaned into Frankie’s chest. “What are the chances of me just disappearing into the floor right now?”
He chuckled low and kissed the top of my head. “Hold your head up. You are fierce, but the greatest warriors are tempered by pain. It's just part of the process.”
I sighed and straightened my shoulders. “Okay. Less self pity. More tequila. Then bed.”
Frankie laughed. “Tequila and then bedtime with a beautiful woman? I am living the dream.”
I slapped him on the chest and motioned him to lead the way out of the crowded hallway. The girls waiting for the bathroom gave the guys lustful looks, but their eyes narrowed when they took in my puffy eyes.
One woman with huge red hair was looking like she was three seconds from whipping out the mace she was definitely carrying in her purse and kicking one of their asses. I gave her a small smile and the girl nod. The nod that said, “Thanks for having my back, Sis. But I’m all good.”
She smiled, and fanned her face. The universal sign of, “Damn, they are hot. Get it, girl.”
Little did she know, I was getting it with none of these fine men. I was going home to rub Arnica cream into every part of my body that hurt, climbing into an oversized shirt and sleeping by myself.
Sad really.
By the time I got to the bar, Beau had a row of Tequila shots racked up. The girl with the huge boobs behind the bar was murmuring something in his ear and I resisted the wave of jealousy. Dylan was permissible. At least I’d had sex with Dylan. Jealousy, while not warranted, would be understandable.
But Beau? I had no claim on Beau. He gave me my first kiss, but I hadn’t seen him in nearly five years. I was pretty sure he wasn’t a damn monk in all that time. He might not have been a rider, and therefore have a buffet of women throwing themselves at him because he rode bulls, but he was tall and broad, had dark brown hair that basically begged for you to tangle your hands in it, preferably while he was trapped between your thighs.
Ugh, on that note. I stepped forward and threw back the shot of tequila. I winced at the burn. Eesh, it tasted like regret and that one time I almost died while having a drinking competition with a bronc rider.
“Cheers,” I gasped out and Dylan laughed, throwing his back too.
Everyone else finished their shots as well, and I could feel the steady rush of alcohol in my veins. It took the edge off my embarrassment. Took the edge off the stress. I looked down at Dylan’s tight ass. For a brief moment, I wondered if I shouldn’t do another shot and blame it for the bad decisions I wanted to make.
Instead, I sighed and looked toward the door. “We better go. Long drive tomorrow.” I looked over at Frankie. “You can stay if you want. I’ll take the first driving shift so you can sleep off the booze and cheap perfume,” I teased, and Frankie gave me a lopsided grin.
Beau laughed, shaking his head and I frowned at him. “What?”
He waved me away. “I’ll tell you when you’re older, Nugget.”
I’d hated when he said that when we were kids, like he and Branch weren’t only one year older than me. Hell, Beau was only eight months older. I glared, and it just made him laugh harder. “You are all grown up, but your pouting face is still exactly the same.”
He leaned forward and kissed my cheek. “Come on, Nugget. We’ll order you an Uber so you can go home and have sweet dreams.”
I nodded. I had a feeling my dreams might involve more cowboys than was good for me tonight.
6
I was jittery. Butterflies had taken flight in my chest and refused to leave. I had no idea where Frankie was. We’d arrived at the arena, he’d kissed my head and taken off behind the chutes before I even had the opportunity to ask. That was hours ago, and he was yet to reappear. I stretched out my legs as Beau sat between them, taping my knees and my shoulders.
“You look like you’re about to run out of here screaming, Nugget. What’s up?”
I wish I knew. Imposter syndrome maybe. Dylan was over in the corner giving an interview to a magazine, his megawatt smile all but begging you to take him home to meet your mama. The girl doing the interview looked like she was one lip-bite away from swooning like a legit Belle.
One of the Brazilians, José, the number one in the world, was giving an interview in stilted English. He looked uncomfortable with the attention, but the guy rode like there wasn’t a bull that could conquer him.
I couldn’t even sit on my bulls. I sucked in a deep breath and wondered what the fuck I was doing. Maybe I could have been a barrel racer or something. Maybe I could have been a kindergarten teacher like my daddy had wanted, even though I was not good with kids. But I mean, how hard could it be? Harder than riding 1600 pounds of enraged beast?
Well, maybe. Thirty five-year-olds was certainly more terrifying to me.
Beau was looking at me, his straight, dark eyebrows lowered over those mesmerizing eyes. His face was twisted into a concerned look, and it was doing something funny to my chest. “What the hell am I doing here, Beau?” I whispered. I didn’t want to say it too loud, just in case the universe heard me and ripped it all away again.
Beau grabbed my knee and squeezed. “You are living your dream, Tessa May. Is this about your no-score last weekend?”
I hesitated then gave a short nod. Beau looked like he wanted to take me into his arms, but I gave him a warning look. As much as I wanted him to soothe away all the hurts like he did when we were kids, it wouldn’t help me gain the respect of the rest of the riders.
He looked deep into my eyes. “We both know that this isn’t an easy career. It’s a few victories with long stretches of defeats. But every defeat is a win. Every time you get up and dust off your ass, you’ve learned something.” He slid his hands up my outer thighs. “You are the stubbornest person I know. What you’re feeling right now is something all rookies that go up a league suffer from at first. It takes a little bit for you to settle into this level. The bulls are more rank. The competition is more ferocious. But you deserve to be here, Nugget. That I truly know.”
“Really? Even Branch?”
Beau scoffed. “You kidding? The stick up his ass wouldn’t let him be anything but the best. But you aren’t Branch, something I thank Jesus for everyday. You are Tessa May Everett, the first girl I ever kissed. You are T.M. Moore, the first female rider at this level. You are Nugget, the strongest person I’ve ever met. You’ve got this.”
Fuck. I wanted to kiss him so bad in that moment that it was making my heart pound beneath my ribcage like a mariachi band.
“Thank you,” I whispered. I slid my hand over his on my thigh and squeezed it. What I really wanted was to urge it a little higher and burn off some of this tension. But that was a bad idea.
Such a bad, bad, bad idea.
I just couldn’t remember why right now.
“Beau!” Branch called, and Beau rocked back on his heels away from me. His eyes were molten though. He felt that tension too. It wasn’t just me. “I need my knee strapped if you’re done with T.M.”