“Solange?”
“I have to go,” I whispered on a ragged breath. “I’m sorry. For everything.” I disconnected and the tears poured out of me. Nothing had ever hurt like this did. I’d thought for sure Axel would believe me, and even if he had to side against me publicly, he would support me in private until we got to the truth. Instead, he’d cut me to the core, and I buried my face in my hands, sobs wracking my body.
“Solange! What are you doing?” Kostya came running outside. “Get inside before someone sees you!”
36
Axel
I’d never spoken to a woman I cared about the way I’d spoken to Solange, with so little regard for her feelings, and I’d regretted it the moment the words came out of my mouth. But I couldn’t call her back because there was no point. I could apologize for the way I’d said what I said, but I couldn’t take it back. I couldn’t change what had happened or prove her innocence, so it was better that I kept my distance. I just hadn’t expected it to feel like this. Like someone had stabbed me right in the heart.
When had she gotten so deep under my skin?
When had I fallen head over heels in love with her? It had only been about seven weeks, after all. How had all of this gone to shit in the blink of an eye? I wanted to go down to the dungeon and pound on Frederick’s face until he told me everything he knew, but shit like that wasn’t allowed. We made exceptions for extreme threats, like when Xander had killed Elen’s kidnapper, but this was different. She was different.
And I’d turned my back on her without knowing all the facts.
I’d just gotten back to the palace after two hellacious days in Braksa and Vinake, and now I had to deal with reality. Logan’s death. Breaking things off with Solange. The investigation. And fucking Frederick. We had the leader of the fucking Brat in our goddamn private prison and no one had been able to get anything out of him.
That ended now.
I went straight to Sandor’s office, rapping lightly on the door.
“Hey.” He looked like he hadn’t slept for days but was alert and focused. “What’s up?”
“Where are we with everything?” I asked.
“We’re in the process of having Logan’s body sent home to his family.”
“Jesus.” Some of my anger dissipated. “Are we, uh, doing anything here? You know, like a viewing?”
“Yes. Tomorrow. Then Erik is personally flying him home and going to spend a little time with his sister. Apparently, he asked Solange to tell Erik to take care of her.”
“You going with him?”
He shook his head. “No, I’m sending Joe, and Chains will meet them in Philadelphia, which is where she lives.” Darryl “Chains” Carruthers had bought Joe’s security firm when Joe had officially become a Royal Protector, and though he wasn’t one of us, he was as close as any outsider could be. We always used him as backup when anyone in the family was in the U.S.
“Fuck.” I couldn’t think of anything else to say and absently scratched my beard.
“Did you talk to her?”
“Yeah.” I knew who he meant.
“And?”
“We didn’t talk long. She was upset when…”
“When what?”
“When I basically told her I didn’t believe her.”
He grimaced. “Is that true? You think she did this?”
“I’m too close to it,” I said after a slight hesitation. “But no, I don’t think she did it. She’s kind and sweet and has a huge heart. When she mentioned the possibility of becoming a Royal Protector, it took all of my self-control not to laugh at her because the idea of her actually pulling a gun on someone is beyond the realm of reality. None of this makes sense, Sandor. None of it.”
“So if you don’t believe it, why didn’t you tell her that?”
I looked him right in the eye. “Because I took an oath to the Protectors and doing anything else would have been a betrayal to that.”
He sighed, nodding slightly. “I’m sorry, my friend.”
“It’s all good. I was never the marrying type, you know? If it turns out she’s innocent, she’ll be better off.” I took a breath. “So, where do you want me today?”
“We’re all sticking close to the palace. Kids are hunkered down, no one is going anywhere, and tonight we’re having a movie night in the big theater. We’re taking a mourning day, so why don’t you take a nap and check in with me later?”
“Yeah, all right. Thanks.” I headed up to my room and tried to rest, but sleep wouldn’t come. I was drained, physically and mentally, but my emotions were all over the place.
Logan.
Solange.
The fucking Brat.
How had this happened?
Technically, it all started with Kostya. I didn’t for a minute believe Solange had in some way targeted me or the royal family. Kostya, on the other hand? He was capable of that and a lot more. And he’d disappeared, according to Sandor.
I got up and grabbed my keys. I had to find him. Kostya had some of the answers we needed and he was going to tell me everything, no matter what I had to do to make him.
I was lost in thought as I got on the elevator and started when I found Natalia already inside. She looked like hell, her eyes red-rimmed, her face a little puffy.
“Hey, how are you doing, Nat?”
She bit her lip. “I’ve been better.”
“I’m sorry, hon.” I reached out and hugged her. She fell against my chest, wrapping her arms around me tightly and sobbing. No one had known she and Logan were an item until this happened, and we were all trying to figure out what to say to her. They’d apparently kept it on the down low because they wanted to be sure before they went public. Also because Natalia’s family probably wouldn’t be happy that she was involved with a foreigner. They were old-school, much like Solange’s parents, so they hadn’t let anyone know. Not even their fellow Protectors.
She finally pulled away, taking a tissue from her purse and dabbing her eyes. “Where are you going?” she asked, since I’d pushed the button for the garage level.
“I need to talk to someone,” I said quietly.
She met my eyes, hers narrowing slightly. “Who?”
“It’s not important. You’re supposed to be taking it easy today.”
“It’s obviously important or you wouldn’t be evading the question. Does it have to do with Logan’s death?”
“Yes.”
“Are you going to see her?”
“Her name is Solange,” I said quietly. “And while I understand you’re hurting, we don’t know that she did anything. Until we do, I’m not condemning her. However, the answer is no. I’m not going to see her. I’m going to look for her brother.”
“Kostya slipped out at five o’clock this morning,” she said. “I watched the video from the front gate when I got up, and he walked out and went east.”
“He went towards the town square,” I said thoughtfully.
“He could get a bus to Vinake, couldn’t he?” she asked, following me out of the elevator.