“Charlotte?”
Maybe this was what she deserved. Maybe after what she’d done—the mistake she still kept from Cole—ending up alone with nothing was unavoidable.
What was she doing here? She didn’t deserve any of this.
Did she think she could just waltz in here and steal everything her friend had? Her business? Her friends? Her brother?
Hadn’t she stolen enough from Julianna? Where did she get off grabbing more?
Cole stood beside her now, close enough to touch. His expression was laced with worry and kindness, focused on her in a way that comforted and unnerved her at the same time.
“Do you want to take a walk?” he asked.
She glanced to the half-opened studio door behind him. “The rehearsal . . .”
“Can wait,” he said. “The guys will be fine. They really did do that perfectly.”
She shook her head, wishing she could just as easily shake away this consuming doubt that had curled up inside her. She’d been living in a dream world. Connor had sold this place to someone else. She’d been a horrible friend to his wife—why would he have trusted Charlotte with the dance studio?
And Cole—once he knew the truth, would he ever be able to forgive her? He’d made it clear how he felt about lying.
And a lie by omission was still a lie.
“Tell the guys I’ll see them tomorrow.”
Cole looked at her, confused.
“I think I need to be alone.”
44
Charlotte got in her car and drove away from Julianna’s studio.
She felt like a fraud. Maybe coming here had been a huge mistake. Maybe she was trying to atone for sins that were too old to be forgiven. Maybe she was still trying to steal what was rightfully Julianna’s.
And maybe walking away from the ballet really had been a terrible mistake.
She parked her car behind the barn at Haven House, hoping Hildy and Steve wouldn’t mind that she was there. She got out and walked the path she’d first discovered with Cole on their first date. He was the single best thing that had ever happened to her, but were they fooling themselves to think it could ever work?
Was it foolish to believe she could be happy here? Was it foolish to believe that she and Cole were meant to be together? That their love could withstand mismatched backgrounds and a truth she’d yet to confess?
The article had suggested that Charlotte had something to “get out of her system.” Marcia explained that her daughter had never really explored a world outside of dance. Several people speculated that Charlotte was simply rebelling, and that she would realize, probably soon, that the ballet was where she belonged.
“Ballet isn’t simply what Charlotte does, it’s who she is. This company made her, and I have to believe she’ll be back when she realizes she has nothing without it. I only hope there’s an open door for her when she does.”
Marcia’s words haunted her now. What if her mother was right? What if she woke up one day, full of funnel cakes and cinnamon rolls, and realized she’d made a terrible mistake? What if it was too late?
“I thought that was you.”
Charlotte turned toward Hildy’s voice and saw the woman emerge from the trees into the clearing where she sat on the picnic table.
“Sorry I’m trespassing,” Charlotte said.
“My waterfall is your waterfall.” Hildy sat down next to her. “You look like you’re working something out. This is a good place to do it.”
Charlotte stared out at the water. “Is it that obvious?”
Hildy wrapped an arm around her and squeezed. “It is to me.”
Charlotte hesitated a long moment, then finally told Hildy about the article. She pulled it up on her phone and let the woman read it, even though it was humiliating.
“It got under your skin.” Hildy handed the phone back to Charlotte. “Why?”
She shrugged. “I’m not sure. I guess maybe because Marcia has been controlling my life for as long as I can remember. And this was the first real decision I made on my own.”
“The decision to come to Harbor Pointe,” Hildy said.
“Yes. And the decision to walk away from ballet.”
Hildy paused thoughtfully. “Does it feel like a mistake?”
“It feels like I finally have everything I’ve been missing,” Charlotte said, aware that her eyes had clouded over with fresh tears. “But dance is who I am.”
“Dance isn’t who you are, Charlotte,” Hildy said. “It’s what you do. There’s a difference.”
“Is there?” Charlotte wasn’t so sure. People always told her she’d been born to dance. If she stopped doing what she was born to do, what was left?
“Of course there is.” Hildy went quiet, then regarded Charlotte with new curiosity. “It was you, wasn’t it?”
Charlotte frowned. “What was me?”
“The friend Julianna left to protect,” she said. “The one she took the fall for.”
Charlotte shrank under the question. “You know about that?”
“Not all the details,” Hildy said. “But enough.”
Charlotte’s head spun. “You’ve known this whole time, and you still let me come here?”
Hildy looked out over the water, thoughtfulness on her face. “She did what she did because she loved you.”
A tear slid down Charlotte’s cheek. “But it was wrong. My bad judgment cost her everything.”
Hildy drew in a deep breath. “Oh, I don’t know, Charlotte, I think it depends on how you look at it. Did it cost her everything, or did she gain everything?”
Charlotte swiped a tear from her cheek and willed herself to stay strong. She’d never told anyone what she did, not even Julianna. They never discussed it—Julianna just knew. She knew and she fell on her sword, all so Charlotte could go on dancing.
“Cole told me once he thought Julianna wouldn’t have traded her life for anything,” Charlotte said.
“I agree with him.” Hildy glanced at her. “You aren’t so sure?”
Charlotte shrugged. “How can we really know? How can we know that she wouldn’t have gone on to be something great?”
“Oh, honey, she did,” Hildy said. “I know you didn’t get to see her with her family or with those kids she taught, but Jules was born for this life.”
Charlotte stilled. “Do you think she would’ve forgiven me?”
“I think she did forgive you,” Hildy said. “Don’t get me wrong, she was devastated when she came home. She told everyone else she decided ballet wasn’t for her, but I knew there was more to the story.”
“Yeah, there was me,” Charlotte said sadly. “Me and my horrible mistake.”
“You can’t change it,” Hildy said. “Though it seems like you’re trying awfully hard to make up for it.”
Was that what she was doing? She didn’t even know anymore.
“I’m the worst kind of friend,” Charlotte said. “I did something terrible because I wanted this certain kind of life, and Julianna sacrificed her own dreams so I could have it. And the day she died, I decided what I really wanted was the life she’d stepped into. How selfish is that?”