An angry expression darkened his features. With long steps, he walked to her father’s sideboard and poured himself a glass of Dutch courage. He took one long swallow, then turned to face her.
“Why are you doing this?”
“Because marrying me is something you do not want to do.” She spoke the words with every bit of emphasis she could summon.
“Do you honestly believe that makes a difference?”
“Accept the out I am offering you, my lord. It’s what you want, and it’s what will be best for both of us.”
He separated himself from her and turned to look outside. He stood with his legs braced wide, his white-knuckled hands clasped behind his back, and his broad shoulders rigid. He did not speak for what seemed an eternity, and Nella wondered why it was taking him so long to agree with her offer. He should jump at the chance to avoid marrying her, yet…
“We will marry, my lady. I will procure a special license, unless of course, you wish to have an elaborate London wedding.”
Nella felt her temper rise. “I do not wish an elaborate London wedding, my lord.” She took one step toward him. “I do not wish to have any kind of wedding at all.”
“Then perhaps you should have thought of that before you compromised both yourself and me.” He took another swallow of his drink. “I did not invite you to that room. You came of your own accord. Nor did I entice you to stay there until we were discovered. That, too, was a choice you made. If anyone is the innocent party in this debacle, I am. It is now incumbent upon you to do what is required in order for me to get my good name back.”
Nella stared at him. It was he who pinned her to floor. It was he who resisted her attempts to get him out of the room in time. Yet, he was putting the blame for what had happened on her. He was demanding that she marry him as penance. She would die of embarrassment if she was forced to stand at his side. The ugly duckling and the handsome prince. Him the frowning beauty and her the cringing, hideous beast.
Nella walked to the sofa on unsteady legs and sank down with an unladylike plop. She stared at the paisley carpet that swam before her eyes and prayed it would stop moving. In time, she slowly lifted her gaze.
“If…” she said, “and it’s a very uncertain ‘if’…” She swallowed past the lump in her throat. “If I agree to marry you, what would you expect from our marriage?”
The earl leveled her a serious look. “I would expect you to be a wife to me in all ways.”
Nella stared at her hands clutched in her lap and nodded in assent.
“And, I would hope that in time you would give me an heir.”
She clutched her hands tighter and nodded in assent.
“And what would you expect, my lady? Or are your demands so numerous you cannot name them all?”
“If we were to marry, I would have only one demand, my lord.”
His eyebrows shot up. “Only one? What, pray tell, is your single demand?”
“I would make you promise that after we married I would be allowed to reside in the country. You could go to London as often as you liked, and stay as long as you liked, but I would want your promise that I would not be required to accompany you.”
“You would not wish to enjoy Society’s revels?”
“No, my lord. I would not.”
He lifted his glass to his mouth and remained silent as if evaluating her one demand. “Are you sure that is your only request?”
“Yes, my lord.”
“Then I agree.”
“What!?” She fairly jumped to her feet.
“I agree. I will procure a special license and we will marry at the earliest convenience. I assume you would like to hold the ceremony here?”
“No!” she replied more firmly. “Did you not hear me? I do not want to marry you! And why would I? Nothing happened!”
“But no matter what you or I say, the world believes otherwise. So hear me well. You don’t have a choice. And neither do I.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “I will repeat my question. Do I assume correctly that you would like to hold the ceremony here?”
There was nothing more she could say, and yet she had to. This outcome was untenable. She had to make him see the alternative. Make a united front and confess their innocence. Even as she opened her mouth to speak, she wondered what words would come out. But he stayed her with his hand.
“You may profess your innocence all you want, but either way, I am ruined.”
It was in that moment that she saw desperation in his face. There were reasons he had not—would not, apparently—share, reasons she wished with all her heart she could discern.
He stood there, poised on the brink of a life neither of them wanted, begging.
Nella swallowed hard. “Yes.”
His head jerked, as if he’d been hit by more than a mere word.
“Very well.”
He turned to call her father into the room but Nella stopped him. She had to offer him one more opportunity to escape this marriage. “You don’t have to do this, your lordship. I will gladly assume the responsibility for rejecting you.”
“Would that were possible, my lady, but it is far too late for that.”
Nella watched him step to the door and call her father back into the room. She sat quietly to the side while they discussed the remaining items in the marriage contract.
Even though she sat in stoic silence, she couldn’t stop the tears spilling from her eyes. She’d never intentionally hurt anyone in her life, yet she had.
She’d hurt the one man she’d loved for years. The one man she would have done anything to save.
Chapter 4
In a blur, the week passed before his eyes, but it was finally over. He’d procured a special license and was now a married man.
He’d taken more ribbing than he thought he could endure. The usual congratulations and good wishes reserved for those getting married reminded him more of words of sympathy.
He’d been teased and harassed because it had always been assumed that he would marry a great beauty. Instead, he was marrying a female lacking beauty or popularity. He’d even heard it bandied about that more than one of his friends thought of him with a generous amount of pity. It was the greatest betrayal from his friends for them to laugh at his misfortune. But he could not deny the truth of their derision. He would wake up every morning for the rest of his life facing a completely unremarkable, plump female.
But the worst of it was over now. He and his new bride were on their way to his country estate. To Colworth Abbey.
“Are you comfortable?” he asked his bride.
“Yes, very. How much longer before we reach your estate?”
“Another hour or so.”
“So your home isn’t that far from London?”
“No. Little more than two hours away from the City.”
His new wife looked at him and smiled. There was something very pleasing about her when she smiled, a gentleness that hinted at good humor. At least he could take comfort in that.
James hadn’t really taken the opportunity to study her features before. Her face was round and her cheeks plump, but her big sapphire eyes shone with warmth. And occasionally, merriment. There was something enticing in the excitement he saw in her eyes when she looked past him out the window at the passing scenery.