With another awkward laugh, I nod and scurry across the room to Connor, where he seems to be kneading the material of my sweater, his hands flexing. He’s locked in a stare with Mr. Coleman as I struggle out of the dirty apron, dumping it in the laundry basket.
“Good girl.” He mutters so quietly I’m the only one who can hear it as he hands my sweater over.
“Marina, I have dough in the proofer,” I say, sad to abandon my challah.
“I’ll take care of it so it’s ready to bake when you come back for class later,” she says.
Connor puts his arm around my shoulders and guides me out of the culinary classroom.
We walk in silence through the hall for a minute before he stops. “We’ll start tomorrow. You shouldn’t have done what you did back there, the lunch room. You just butted in and…” He pushes out a harsh breath. “I got caught up, but I didn’t mean to make you cry.” His jaw clenches. “Clean slate?”
As if I could forget everything? Yeah, right.
Worst of all, if he really needed my help—before he broke my heart—I would have helped him out, no questions asked because that’s the kind of person I am.
I huff, crossing my arms. “Are you kidding? You treated me like shit.”
“I’m apologizing for it,” he growls, turning cold gray eyes on me. “I don’t have to. Would you rather I do business as usual and apply pressure until it hurts you even more? Don’t forget, I’m the one with all the leverage.”
A shiver runs down my spine. “It’s a crappy apology. Are you going to spread my photos around?”
“No. As long as our deal stands.”
I can’t believe him. I’ve spent the last half hour sick out of my mind worrying my private photos would be all over school by the end of the day. But for whatever reason, he needs me.
Everything is on Connor’s whim. This world is one where he does whatever—gets whatever he wants, and the rest of us simply exist to bend to his will.
“You’re not forgiven for being an ass,” I say, pushing his arm off my shoulder and walking away.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Away from you.” I turn my head just enough to see him from the corner of my eye. “Until tomorrow, when this dog and pony show starts.”
He stares for a beat, then snorts and shakes his head. Turning around, he heads in the opposite direction.
“See you tomorrow, little mouse. Be ready.”
Eleven
Thea
By be ready, Connor meant he’d be blocking my driveway in the morning, his dark silver Lexus GX idling as he waited for me, one hand resting over the top of the wheel as I stood there like an idiot.
He’s throwing me in the deep end and we haven’t even talked about the details. I wasn’t inclined to message him anytime soon, so I thought he might find me before school to go over our…agreement. This is ridiculous and frustrating me to no end.
I stay rooted in my driveway, hoping Mom isn’t peeking out the window for one of her random checks because I can’t explain to her what I don’t understand myself yet.
“Let’s go!” Connor shouts through the open window, gesturing like what as he squints at me. “We’re gonna be late if you don’t get in the car.”
“I didn’t ask for a ride.” I nod to my blue Mini Cooper. “I have my own car.”
Connor snorts. “That is a doll car. Get in, now.”
My lips purse. Damn him. He can’t control me!
But he’s right, we can’t keep arguing or we’ll be late. Groaning under my breath, I climb into the front seat, dumping my bag by my feet. The car smells like him—earthy and woodsy with hints of spice. It envelops me, making my stomach flip over in a weird way.
“Don’t think this will be a regular thing. When are we going over the rules? I’m totally making this one of them.”
“We will.” He reaches out with his free hand after he pulls away from the curb, taking mine and threading our fingers together. I go still, surprised he wants to hold my hand when there’s no one around to put on our act for. “And I am. Boyfriends drive their girlfriends to school. Can’t look like a bad boyfriend leaving you stranded.”
A sardonic laugh bursts from me. Connor tips his head to peer at me.
“Stranded? Please, I can drive myself. You humiliated me yesterday in front of your friends and made fun of my sweater, now you’re holding my hand like you’re sweet?” I yank my hand free and tuck it beneath my thigh so he can’t get at it. I smooth my green plaid uniform skirt with my other hand, then prop my elbow against the door, resting my head in my palm. “You’re still not forgiven. I’m only here because you’re blackmailing me. I wouldn’t come near you otherwise.”
“You certainly were ready to come all over me before.” The glare I direct at him drops the temperature in the car by a few degrees. He blows out a slow, strained breath and grips the wheel with both hands. “Okay. Whatever. Noted.”
We ride in silence for a long stretch. The drive to school isn’t long, and I realize I’m wasting a good opportunity for the details I’m desperate for.
“So what’s our deal? Or rather, your deal that I have no choice but to accept because the alternative is…yeah, no thanks. Asshole.” I shift a little to face him better as we drive through Ridgeview, turning onto the tree-lined road that leads up to the school. “When did we get together? How did it happen?”
Connor cuts a look at me from the corner of his eye. “We’ll keep it simple so it’s easy to remember. We’ve grown up as neighbors. Got together over summer or something. You’re the girl next door, what’s not to like about that?”
I frown as he hitches a shoulder. “That’s unimaginative.”
Amusement crosses his face. “We could always use the true version: you sent me a wrong number nude and I was like aight.”
“You ass! We are not using that. And I wasn’t naked.”
“Yet. Shortly after?” Connor hums, shifting in the driver’s seat. “So gloriously naked.”
With a scandalized squeal, I swat his arm, overwhelmed by his proximity and what he’s saying. He drives me to things I never do.
He laughs. The corner of his mouth tugs up in a crooked grin as he turns the wheel with the heel of his palm, entering the student parking lot.
“You want a whirlwind romance, or something? I’m just trying to make it easy. It’s not like it’s real.”
The words slice me and I suck in a pained gasp.
It’s not real.
Right.
For as big as his SUV is, I’m suffocated by being so near to him while my emotions spiral.
Connor is my first actual boyfriend, but it’s all fake. I stare at my lap.
“Is it cool if I drop you off here?”
I look up, blinking out of my depressing thoughts. He took the loop that cuts off from the student lot for pick ups and drop offs up the hill where the school stands flanked by tall pine trees. His friends gather in the parking lot at the base of the hill. Devlin Murphy’s flashy red sports car stands out like a beacon, and a few people gather around it as he leans against the side.