“So there isn’t another man standing in my way,” I mumble.
“Nope, there’s not.” Dori types something on her phone, not noticing me about to pass out from the sheer fear of never holding Sedona again.
My back slides along the wall as I sink to the floor with my head in my hands.
“Jamison, she’s going to be fine. She’s a Bailey.” Dori doesn’t lean down to comfort me, and she shouldn’t. I’m scum.
“What if something happens during surgery? I could lose her before I’m able to win her back.” I glance up at her. “What have I done?”
Dori steps up, towering over me. Her shoulders fall and her eyes soften. I’ve only ever seen this side of her on Bailey Founder’s Day.
“Get up,” she says.
I shake my head.
“This is my last time asking. Get up,” she says.
I manage to get myself onto my feet.
“Usually I wouldn’t be so gracious to someone who hurt my grandchild so badly, but I’ve always had a soft spot for you. And I understand what you’re going through. Everyone deserves a second chance, but.” Her finger raises. “Only a second. I don’t do that ‘third times a charm’ crap, you hear me?”
I nod, having no idea what she’s about to say.
“So I’m going to help you have access to Sedona, but I’m not going to convince her to take you back. That’s her decision. But if you ruin this opportunity and my granddaughter and great-granddaughter get hurt, Ethel’s grandson is a hitman and he owes me a lot of favors.”
I laugh.
She doesn’t.
My laugh dies. “Got it. How are you going—”
She holds up her hand. “I’m Dori Bailey. Are you really going to doubt me? Just be prepared when I call you.”
She walks away and opens the door of the small room. Savannah, Liam, Palmer and Brinley walk into the hospital when we get into the hallway. Palmer squirms to get out of Savannah’s arms, but Savannah repositions her and continues walking past us, barely sparing me a glance.
I still have to prove myself not only to Sedona, but her entire family. As uncomfortable as it is, I duck into the waiting area and take a chair away from the rest of them. They talk and reassure Austin that it’s all going to be okay, and I try to take their confidence into my own psyche.
Palmer finds her way over to me and crawls onto the chair next to me before placing her hand in mine. She has no idea what’s going on with her mom right now, but I want to hold her close because she’s part of Sedona and me together. We made her, and she’s perfect. Just like I know Sedona and I will be again.
Nine
Sedona
Having emergency surgery puts a lot of things in perspective. As I lie in the hospital bed, Holly and Austin are tucked in the corner with their newborn daughter, Harper, my thoughts drift back to when they told me I was going in for a C-section. That Harper was in distress and they needed to get her out.
Austin and Holly hugged and decided she’d be the one to stay with me. I saw the tug-of-war in Austin’s eyes. Sure, his primary concern was Harper, but his second was me. How fast things can change and become beyond your control.
I felt the fear too. What if something happened to me? What would happen to Palmer? Sure, my family would raise her, but Jamison would have a right to her too.
I watch them smile and nuzzle Harper closer. Holly’s tears only controllable for short stints. It takes me back to when I delivered Palmer and it was Phoenix holding my hand, the two of us cuddled in the twin-size hospital bed, pointing out every Bailey characteristic on my daughter’s face, acting as if her fair skin and narrow nose weren’t clear signs of the Ferguson genes. As if I had somehow immaculately birthed a baby with no father.
For the past eighteen months, I’ve pushed the topic of her father as far as I could, never considering what would happen to Palmer if something happened to me. Now Jamison is here, in Lake Starlight, asking to be a part of her life. I can’t very well shut the door in his face. My siblings have their own lives. It’s time that I address the fact that he’s going to be a part of ours.
The nurse comes in and interrupts my thoughts, wanting to take Harper for some tests. Holly follows, but Austin walks over to my bedside.
“You ready for visitors?” he asks. “You had a lot of people scared.”
“Could you have someone bring Palmer to me?”
He nods, squeezes my hand, and leaves the room.
A few minutes later, Grandma Dori steps into the room with Palmer.
Mommy. She smiles, but I can tell she’s confused as to why I’m in this bed.
Grandma Dori helps Palmer crawl up onto the bed. I tuck her to my side, trying to steer clear of my stitches. I have no idea how I’m going to get through this recovery while chasing after her.
Grandma Dori sits in a chair by the bedside. “How are you, dear?”
“I’m good. Not too sore yet since all the drugs are flowing through my system still. I’ll be here for three days. I need to find someone to take care of Palmer, then even when I get home, I’ll have restrictions.”
I hate being unable to care for my own child. I’m happy I helped Austin and Holly have another baby, but I didn’t realize I’d be in this position. I assumed my physical recovery would be like it was after Palmer, but without the sleepless nights.
Grandma Dori pats my hand. “I’ll help you, and as for Palmer, she can stay with me.”
“With you?” I raise my eyebrows.
Palmer rests her head on my chest and wraps her arm around me. From the increasing weight of her body on me, I’m positive she’s falling asleep.
“Yes, Sedona, I can take care of a child. I had a son, and who do you think helped your mother wrangle you all?”
“I didn’t mean to offend you, but will the retirement community even allow Palmer to stay there?” One night is one thing, three is a whole other. Plus, Grandma doesn’t drive anymore, which means Palmer will be riding in Grandma’s Caddy with Ethel behind the wheel. What am I thinking? I need a quick excuse to get out of this situation. “Thanks for the offer, but Palmer doesn’t sleep well in other places. I’ll just ask Kingston and Stella to come stay with her at our house. But I’d really appreciate it if once I’m discharged, you could come over and help me during the day. Maybe take her to the park and stuff.”
Her smile says I’ve won her over enough. I doubt she really wanted Palmer at night anyway. “Perfect. I’ll get your apartment situated.”
I wave her off. “Oh no, I’m fine.”
“Nonsense.” She pats my hand again. “There’s someone who really wants to see you.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’m not ready.”
But she disappears out the door, not listening. No real surprise there.
I sigh. Staring at Palmer’s sleeping body next to me, I run my hand over her dark hair and down her chubby arms. She’s never been away from me for even one night. I have no idea how she’s going to handle the separation.
A large figure fills the doorway in my peripheral and my heart gallops. I glance up, and he rushes into the room as if I granted him permission.