Leela doesn’t even acknowledge me. Just walks back to her corner and wipes her fingers on a white towel hanging from a rack. “Hurry up, Isabella. You can’t afford any more fuck-ups. And stop blubbering. You have been warned so many times.”
“Warned?” I look at Isabella.
She’s shaking her head at me. “Just, please, Cadee. Please don’t say anything else.”
Then she grabs the folded white garment and it unfolds in her hands to become a short nightgown. She slips it over my head and covers me up with a loud sigh. Then she wipes the tears from her face and takes a deep breath, just as Leela comes over to us with Elizabeth in the same nightgown.
“Ready?” Leela is clearly—so very clearly—not talking to me and Elizabeth that I have a sudden surge of anger at her… what? Indifference?
But it’s more than that.
It’s like a shunning.
Like Elizabeth and I don’t exist.
Then she looks at me. Like straight in the eyes. “You do not exist, Cadee.” I’m so stunned, I don’t say anything. “Yet. You are not one of us. You are an offering. However”—she pauses—“if you finish the rite tonight, you will be one of us. And then we will have expectations of you. Then, little by little, your opinion will matter. You were at the rush. Cooper fucked it all up, but surely, you got the general idea, right?”
I don’t know what to say, so I say nothing.
“You aren’t even a person to us, Cadee. Yet. But one day, if you do as you’re told, you will be.” Then she looks at Elizabeth. “She will never be anyone again. Because she messed up. Isn’t that right, Fugling?”
I almost gasp at the name. Fugling. Then I look at Isabella. It was her name. At least I thought it was. But it wasn’t, was it? It’s all part of the…what? Conditioning? Is that what this is?
Cooper’s words come back to me from that first day. You had better be very fucking careful what you say around here. One mouthy outburst from you, Fugling, and you’re out. No place to live, no summer job, no scholarship.
He knew.
And once again, he said nothing.
But it’s not his fault I’m here. It’s mine. I did this. I chose this. He didn’t want me to. He tried to stop me more times than I can count. And I insisted. Just a few minutes ago, I insisted.
So I let it go. Because Leela is talking again. Only she’s not talking to me, she’s talking to Isabella. “—you need to be very careful. Very. Careful. One more slip-up, Isabella, and you’ll spend the rest of your life like Elizabeth here.”
One thing is for sure. Dane was killed by someone. But I highly doubt it was my mother’s champagne order that did it. And now Elizabeth must pay for the crimes of her husband.
“Cadee?”
I snap back to attention. “Yes?”
“You are not in the same situation.”
“I’m not?”
“No, sweetie. You’re the golden girl tonight. Everyone is here to see you succeed. We all want you to have a charmed life with Cooper.” She side-eyes my sister-wife. “And maybe, if she doesn’t fuck things up, Isabella. Just follow the rules. Do as you’re told and you will have it all. Mess up like Elizabeth, and it will all be taken away. Get yourself into a predicament like Isabella here, and you’ll be made an example of in a very unpleasant way.”
I just stare at her.
Then Valentina’s little show that first day comes to mind. You want the diamonds? You want the mansion? You want the lake, and boats, and the cars? You want the security? And the man? Then you do what you’re told. If that’s not what you want, then walk out any time. It’s. Your. Choice.
“Your choices will be taken away from you, Cadee. Do you understand me?”
It’s like she’s reading my mind. I can walk out now. But if I stay, I’m in.
Just like Cooper said.
It’s not that I want all those things. That’s not why I’m going to stay. I just want to know things. I feel like I’ve been living a lie. But I’m not sure where the lie is, so I can’t even go looking for the truth. I get that somehow my parents’ deaths are tied up in this secret society. Maybe it was Dane. Maybe it was the Chairman. They are the usual suspects.
And that works most of the time. In retrospect, most of the time the answers are obvious because hindsight is twenty-twenty.
But up until now I had no retrospect and nothing about my life has been obvious. I grew up on an elite private-school campus, but never went to school there.
Why? How does that make sense? If my parents hated this place so much, why stay? And if someone was forcing them to stay, why homeschool me? You’d think, if you were being held prisoner on an elite private-school campus, that refusing to send your daughter to their exceptional cult school would be a red flag. Right?
Something is not adding up.
So I nod at Leela. “I understand.”
“Would you like to leave?”
“No, Leela. I want to stay.”
She smiiiiiles at me. A very satisfied smile that reminds me of… Oh, pick your favorite evil villainess. Let’s just go with the Commander’s Wife in The Handmaid’s Tale for now because we’ve got a running theme here.
“Perfect.” She pauses to sigh. “Wonderful.” Then she leans in to me. Very close. And her words are low. “Challenge yourself, Cadee. Rise to the occasion. Show these men that you have what it takes to hold their secrets close. And if you can do that, you’ll get what you came for.”
I just stare at her.
“Answers. Secrets. We all know you’re not motivated by money.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because when the Chairman paid you off, you stuck around, didn’t you? You stuck around and did exactly what you were told. That sent a signal to the Order that you can be trusted. They want to trust you, Cadee. You’re very important to them.” She leans in even closer now. “Shine tonight, darling. That’s all you have to do. Just shine tonight.”
She pulls back and calls out, “Let’s go, ladies. The men are waiting.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN - COOPER
The moment Cadee and Isabella walk away I know I’ve made a mistake. I start to go after them, but Jack grabs my arm. “Come on, Coop. Let’s go get a drink.”
I let out a long breath, unable to take my eyes off the girls until they disappear into a crowd in front of the tomb.
“She’ll be fine.”
I look at Jack and narrow my eyes a little. He’s way more invested in this whole Fang and Feather thing than I realized. And it’s interesting that he used the word she. Singular. So which one isn’t he talking about?
“Seriously, Coop. You’re overthinking this, brother.” He tugs on my arm and I follow him. But I look back at my father and find him studying me intently, a frown on his face.
Am I disappointing him again? Why is he frowning? Is he worried too?
I take a deep breath to calm myself. Because I knew what I was getting into. And so did Cadee. And now that we’re here, at the beginning of it, there’s no room for regret.
Jack and I stop at the edge of the forest and he grabs two whiskey glasses off a passing server’s tray. That’s when I see Victor English over near the tomb.