She doesn’t say anything, just takes my hand, and I pull her into me. God, I missed this. Holding her. Everything about her was addicting.
But what little hope I had dies when she speaks. “I can’t.”
I let go of her and run a hand through my hair. “Okay,” I say, hating that I’ve hurt her. I understand that just because I’m trying doesn’t mean I deserve the chance to make it right.
“I mean.” She sighs. “I need to talk to you, Grave.”
Her words don’t help the bad feeling in my gut that I’ve gone too far. I did too much. She isn’t Lucy. April demanded all of me and what I gave her was a watered down, drug induced version. “Yeah, sure. I guess there is a lot we need to discuss …”
“I didn’t get pregnant on purpose,” she rushes out.
I frown. “I never said that you did.” That thought never even crossed my mind. It took the both of us to make our baby. I knew the possibilities when I chose not to use a condom.
“I’ve been going crazy thinking. Finally I remembered that a few weeks before you came into Roses, I was sick. I was on antibiotics. I didn’t realize they could disrupt birth control.” She licks her lips. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking …”
“Hey, it’s okay.”
“I don’t want your money, Grave. And if you want to walk away, I understand,” she adds.
“What?” I blink.
“I don’t want you to be stressed. If you don’t want to be part of his or her life, I also understand.”
She’s not making sense. What the hell has she been thinking while I’ve been in rehab? I should have reached out to her. But there was a very short list of people who I could have contact with. I wanted her to focus on the baby, not my recovery. “April …”
“I know things aren’t ideal.” She sniffs and averts her eyes to her heels.
I place my hands on either side of her face and she looks up at me, her ice blue eyes full of tears. “What are you talking about?”
“I don’t want to put any pressure on you,” she whispers.
“You’re not.” I assure her. She’s the only thing that I know I can’t live without. I need her more than any hit I’ve ever craved.
She bites her bottom lip. “I’m afraid.” Her watery eyes dart around the room.
“Of what?” My chest tightens. “Of me? I promise you, April. I will be better for you and our baby,” I quickly reassure her.
“That’s what I’m afraid of.” A tear rolls down her face.
“What do you mean?” Her bottom lip begins to quiver. “Hey, talk to me. Please.” Whatever it is, I’ll do whatever it takes to make things right. But I can’t guess what she’s thinking.
She lets out a shaky breath. “I’m afraid you won’t love me sober.”
My tight chest constricts like a vice at her confession. How could she think that? What have I done to make her think I could love her any less? I love her more. I did this for her. I’m demanding more of myself because she deserves that. “April …”
“You almost kissed me in your car but stopped,” she adds, interrupting me. “And I realized that maybe you don’t want …”
I cut off her insane words by pressing my lips to hers. Her arms immediately wrap around my neck as she parts her lips for me, allowing me to deepen the kiss. My hands tangle in her hair, loosening her updo, and I tilt her head back to give me better access to her lips. I devour her. Drink her in as if she is the cure to a disease.
I pull away and she opens her heavy eyes, lips parted as she sucks in a breath. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life proving to you that I love you.”
EPILOGUE
APRIL
IT’S BEEN A month since Emilee and Titan’s wedding. Grave went back to rehab that night, and a week later I picked him up knowing that he wouldn’t have to return like Cinderella at midnight.
Things have been crazy busy since the wedding. Titan had every news crew in Las Vegas there and there was a picture of him and Emilee that ended up on the cover of a magazine. The title read The King found his Queen. It was gorgeous. I blew it up and hung it inside of Roses.
Turns out, that wedding got a lot of publicity, which in turn gave me exposure. Emilee and Titan had done an interview that was published in the magazine as well and dropped my name along with the shop as their florist. The calls started rolling in.
And that call that I got right before we walked with Emilee down the aisle? It was from my realtor. After what Emilee and Titan had paid me for their wedding, I had enough to make an offer on the boutique that was for sale next to me. They accepted it.
Me, Jasmine, Haven, and Alexa spent the week that Emilee was away for her honeymoon tearing down the wall that divided the boutique from Roses. Who knew a sledgehammer and some beers would be such a great stress reliever? Well, being the mom-to-be, I had Capri Suns. But there was still something very therapeutic about it, nonetheless.
Ethan is staying out of trouble for the most part. He’s been at the shop every day showing me that he’s dedicated and trying his best. He told me that he wants to work off his debt to Grave the right way. I respect that. And so does Grave.
Grave is doing well. He doesn’t seem much different from the man I fell in love with. He’s always going out of his way to make me laugh. He’s home every night after he leaves Kingdom and at work every morning. I can’t say he’s on time because I always seem to be making us late.
I moved in with Grave after he got out of rehab and gave Ethan our mother’s house. He tried to refuse it, but it was the right thing to do. Although he comes over to our house once a week and drops off his laundry. He can’t understand the concept of sorting colors.
“I know. That’s what I said.” Grave speaks into his cell as he enters the kitchen. He comes over to me, kisses my hair and takes a pancake from the plate. He nods his head to himself while he stabs the peanut butter jar with a knife, spreads it across the pancake and then folds it in half before shoving it in his mouth. “Mmmm hmm.” He mumbles to his phone before swallowing it. “It needs to happen now. We’re losing money every day,” he tells whoever he is talking to.
“Hello?” I hear a female voice call out.
“In here,” I answer, reaching over and grabbing the tray that has the raw steaks on them off the island. “I seasoned them,” I whisper to Grave and he takes them from me, mouthing thank you. After another kiss in my hair, he’s gone, continuing his conversation.
“I brought the syrup,” Jasmine announces, entering.
“Thanks,” I say, taking it from her. “I didn’t realize we were out.”
“Where are Haven and Emilee?” she asks, jumping up to sit on the island and starts peeling a banana I had sitting in the glass bowl.
“Haven messaged me that her and Luca would be thirty minutes late,” I answer.
She rolls her eyes. “They’re having sex more than me. Every time I talk to her, she’ s like gotta go fuck his dick because we want a baby.” Then Jasmine sticks the banana in her mouth biting it almost in half.