‘How are you doing?’ It’s the most ridiculous question, but it’s the only one I can think of.
‘Crap,’ he says, sorrowful grey eyes mooning over his ginger beard.
‘What happened?’
‘I got a message to call Russell, and when I did he told me I hadn’t made the cut. No thank you, no good luck for the future. It just came out of nowhere.’
‘We were shocked, too,’ I say, adding, ‘All of us,’ in case he might be thinking otherwise.
‘This just keeps happening, Otty. I don’t know why. This was my last chance. My big break. I don’t know how I’ll pick myself up again.’
‘You will.’ You’ll have to. What choice do you have?
‘I mean, I thought my writing was good…’
‘It was. It is.’
‘Not good enough to impress King Russell though.’
I don’t want to be here. I never volunteered to be the sole Ensign spokesperson. Why didn’t Joe stay a bit longer?
‘Then he’s an idiot. You’re great, Josh. Everyone thought so. Joe said…’
‘Yeah, well, I haven’t heard from Joe, have I? Which says a lot. I’m sorry, Otty, I know you live with him but seriously the guy is a snake.’
I’m so surprised I can’t speak. Instead I stare, goldfish-mouthed, at him.
‘He’s so cosy with Russell all the time. And he’s survived all the other writer culls. You can’t tell me he didn’t know it was coming.’
‘He didn’t.’
‘I think Joe Carver knows exactly what’s going on. I think him and Daphne are in it with Russell and he’s as much a part of the decision process as they are.’
It gets worse. Josh starts to reel off every bad experience he’s had in writing teams, identifying a Joe Carver in every one. The guy – it’s always a guy, according to Josh – who’s everyone’s friend until it counts. The best mate of the showrunner, the one who’d sell his family to succeed. I heard this from Daphne, but it meant nothing then.
It means nothing now.
Josh is upset. He needs a target and he can’t yell at Russell. All the same, I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to doubt Joe, not for a second.
‘I’m so sorry this has happened. There’s something a million times better out there for you. I’m sure of it.’
I don’t feel sure of anything. But Josh seems to take the hint.
‘Cheers.’
‘Take care, Josh.’ I go in for a hug, Josh thinks he’s kissing my cheek and we meet in an awful half-cheek-half-lips collision that sends both of us stepping back in horror. I need to get out of here.
‘Sorry. We can keep in touch, yeah?’
‘Sure,’ I lie because I want to get away.
Josh nods and steps back from Monty. I’ve opened the door and am in the driver’s seat before he can say anything else. But as I’m closing the door, his hand catches it and he leans in.
‘Just be careful, Otty. With Joe? He’s more involved with Russell than you think. You’re too lovely to be sullied by someone like him.’
I’m shaking as I speed away.
I don’t want to believe it. But even driving home, my brain is making connections I don’t want it to. Joe is very close to Russell. Could he have known what was going to happen? They’re always going off for private discussions – were they discussing this?
And even though I think Daphne talks out of her bum most of the time, what she said to me before about Joe refuses to go away. I’m angry that he didn’t do the decent thing and contact Josh himself. No matter how innocent he is of all the other stuff, his silence is damning. And, while I know Joe couldn’t have known Josh would show up at work this evening, I’m furious that Joe’s insensitivity made me feel obliged to hear all this.
By the time I park outside the house, I’m ready for a fight.
‘Oi, love, give us a smile,’ Joe grins as I power into the kitchen.
And that’s the only spark this powder keg needs.
‘Get stuffed.’
Joe’s eyebrows make a bid for the ceiling. ‘It was a joke?’
Ignoring him, I switch on the kettle and chuck a teabag into a mug. After the day I’ve had, I need tea and then bed, not Joe Carver being a dick.
‘Otts?’
‘I don’t feel like smiling, okay?’
‘You should. There’s plenty to be optimistic about. We’re still on the team and Russell wants us working together. And the hipster beard and hair-flick ratios have significantly lowered in the writers’ room.’
I stare at him. ‘You are unbelievable.’
‘Okay, do you have a problem with me?’
‘Yes, I have a problem. Your writing partner just lost his job – along with several of our colleagues – and you’re cracking jokes?’
‘Oh, come on, Otts, that’s not fair. You laugh or you die, that’s how you survive this. How we survive this.’
‘You worked with Josh. You wrote part of the Eye, Spy pilot with him. Did you even send a text to offer your condolences or thank him for the work he did?’
‘Why would I do that?’
‘Because it’s decent, Joe! Because it’s human.’
‘It’s the business we’re in. Yes, it sucks, but it could just as easily be us next time.’
‘And that makes it all okay?’
His groan echoes around the kitchen. ‘I didn’t say that. There’s just no point in getting comfortable with anyone in that room because nothing lasts.’
‘So I guess you and I shouldn’t be friends then?’
I know I’ve pushed the point too far, but I’m horrified by Joe’s attitude. As soon as the words leave me I can see I’ve lost the advantage.
‘No, I think we should, Otty. But hey, if you reckon it would be a liability being friends with a heartless android like me, maybe we shouldn’t bother.’
I grip the back of the chair and stare at the old grain in the kitchen table. I hope Joe will walk out but he doesn’t move.
‘And how do you know how Josh is, anyway? He might be fine. Furious with Russell, probably. But already applying for new writer jobs if he has any sense. It’s what you do in this business.’
‘He’s devastated.’
‘How do you know?’
‘Because he was waiting by my car tonight.’
He stares at me. ‘Oh, Otts, you didn’t talk to him…’
‘What else was I supposed to do? He’s just lost his job and he is crushed by it. Panicking about how he’ll pay his rent this month. Thinking his career is over. This isn’t the first writing job he’s been axed from. But I’m guessing you didn’t know that because you don’t believe in getting too attached…’
Joe snorts. ‘Well, at least it saves me from kissing him better.’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’
‘Work it out.’
‘I didn’t kiss him better. I listened to him, like the rest of you should have done. It was the decent thing to do.’
‘Why?’
‘Because he just lost his job!’