The moment my skin touched hers, I felt my world shift—correct. Felt my goddamn soul come alive for the first time since Madison had walked away from me.
My fingers were loose around her wrist. She could’ve easily slipped away. But she stopped short, her chest heaving with a sharp inhale.
I let my stare dance around her face for a moment, around the only parts of her that still somewhat resembled her, and said, “You haven’t been back for even a holiday, but you’re standing here now after thirteen years.”
Her wide eyes met mine, saying so many things and begging even more before she shut them tight and shifted her head to the side.
“Tell me,” I said, the soft plea falling from my tongue, “what are you doing here?”
After a long moment, her eyes opened, stare on where I was still holding her. To the hand there—my left hand. When her eyes met mine again, confusion and hurt swirled there. “I did come back. Once. For you.”
When she gently pulled against my hold, I didn’t try to keep her there.
I wasn’t sure I could.
Those few words had stunned me about as much as seeing her had.
Frozen in place. Heart hammering. Mind racing, trying to figure out when and how I couldn’t have known.
Word that Madison Black had shown back up in Amber would’ve spread through town like wildfire, as it was sure to do now. People would’ve scrambled to make sure it got back to me. Yet no one had ever said a thing.
“When?” I begged when she grabbed the handle of the door.
She hesitated for a moment, refusal written over every inch of her as her fingers curled tighter.
I pressed a hand to the door and stepped closer. “When, Madison?”
She looked up, brows drawn close and stare begging me not to do this even as she admitted, “I didn’t stay long after finding out you were no longer here. That you were getting married.”
My heart dropped as that time of my life flashed through my mind like a bad dream. As I realized what else it had ruined.
“I’m not,” I said quickly. “I didn’t.”
Her head moved in subtle shakes. “I can’t do this right now.”
“Madi—”
“Hunter, please.” Her eyelids shut, squeezing tight. A few tears escaped, falling quickly down her cheeks.
And I about lost myself at the sight of them. At the sound of my name falling from her lips again. At the slightest hint of that drawl finally weaving through.
“I can’t do this,” she whispered. “I can’t handle seeing you right now. Please let me go.”
My voice was all gravel and pain when I said, “I did that once, and it was the biggest mistake of my life.”
Her eyes flashed open, shock and regret pulsing from her as she studied me.
Her lips parted only to form a tight line as shame darted across her face. She gave another soft shake of her head and tugged on the door, slipping inside when there was just enough space for her to fit through.
And I stood there.
Watching as this shell of the girl she used to be struggled to pull herself together.
Every part of me aching to follow after her. To hold her. To comfort her.
But there was that voice screaming in my head that she was married. That her kid was somewhere in that store.
Not to mention, there was another woman who also had a claim on my heart.
I’d said I wouldn’t waste a second with Madison. But in that scenario, I hadn’t expected us to belong to other people.
“How much do I love you?” I asked softly as I finished tucking Avalee into my old bed that night.
Her sweet face lit up. “More than the words!”
“More than there are words,” I whispered as I pretended to write a word in the air.
“More than the stars!”
“More than all the stars,” I said, slowly moving my hand as if to show off the sky hidden by the ceiling.
She waited, her expression so bright and eager, as it always was for this last part.
“I’ll love you until time stands still.” With each of the last three words, I tapped her forehead, then her nose, and then her chin.
“Until time stands still,” she echoed through the tiny giggle escaping her as I tickled the base of her neck.
I peppered her cheeks and nose with kisses before standing and handing over her favorite stuffed animal.
The octopus had definitely seen better days but, then again, so had we.
“Mommy?” Avalee called out when I reached the door, one hand on the knob, the other on the light switch.
“Yeah, baby girl.”
“That man today . . . the one that made you cry,” she said uncertainly as she sat up, and I felt my stomach twist.
My chest wrench open.
My heart fall to the floor.
She hadn’t mentioned him after I’d come into the boutique this evening, just gone on as if it were any other day. My momma and I hadn’t talked about it, even though there had been plenty of silent conversations through looks. We’d made it all through dinner and bath time without Hunter Dixon being brought up.
I wasn’t sure why I’d thought we could avoid it forever.
Maybe because I’d wanted to avoid this excruciating pain radiating through me. Same as when I’d seen him standing there like the best kind of dream and worst kind of nightmare.
“Mmhm?” I managed to force out.
“Is he why we’re here?” she asked in that same hesitant tone.
“No. No, you know why we’re here.”
Her expression fell as her own pain and confusion took over. “’Cause of Daddy.”
I hurried back to the bed, sitting close to her side and gripping her hands in one of mine. “I’m sorry, Avalee. I’m so, so sorry,” I whispered through the tightening of my throat.
I would’ve given anything to change the situation for her. To make our lives go back to how they’d been just a few days before—if even just to take away the tears forming in my daughter’s eyes.
“This isn’t forever,” I assured her. “We’ll go home, and you’ll be able to see Daddy. But for now . . . for now, we have to be here.”
“Because of that man?”
“No, honey.”
“But I saw him,” she argued as if I wasn’t understanding.
“We saw a lot of people today.”
“But I saw him in my dreams.”
The corners of my lips pulled into a shaky smile as I reached up to brush back some of her unruly hair.
Avalee hadn’t seen so much as a picture of Hunter until a few hours ago, but I loved her imagination. Her dreams were always so over-the-top and adorable, so I bit.
“Oh yeah?” I cleared my throat when my voice cracked again and asked, “What was this dream about?”
“I dream about him every night,” she said enthusiastically, as though we’d been gone from Seattle much longer than the forty-eight or so hours it’d been. “Every night since we left home, he’s right there. Like, right there, Mom. Standing there.”
I nodded slowly so she knew I was listening. But inside, I was doing everything to switch out the words she was saying.
To pretend the man she was talking about wasn’t the man I was meant to spend my forever with. The man I lost because I’d been too afraid.