I snickered. “Yes, ma’am.”
“And one last thing.” She placed her hands against my face. “When you need us, you call. Day or night, you call home. Okay?”
“Okay, I promise.”
She leaned in and kissed my cheek before patting her hand gently against it. It was how she “locked the kisses in place.” “Okay, good.”
I turned to Haze, who was standing back a little.
I rubbed my left shoulder blade. “You sure you don’t want to ride with us to the airport, Haze? Or even come to LA?” I semijoked. I couldn’t get the thoughts of our night together out of my head. All I wanted was more nights like the previous one. In the perfect world, I’d come home from a day in the studio, pull her into the shower with me, and make love with her under the steaming hot water. I’d make love to her in the kitchen too. In the living room. Dining room. In every single place possible, I’d make love to her.
“Don’t tempt me,” she said. “If I went to LA with you, I doubt I’d want to come back.”
“All right, well, I guess we just say good—”
“Don’t, Ian,” she cut in, closing her eyes. “Don’t say goodbye, okay? Just hug me, and get it over with.”
I did as she said, and she held me tighter than she ever had before.
“Last night was perfect,” I whispered into her ear.
“Perfect, perfect,” she replied. She pulled slightly away from me. “You’re going to call me,” she ordered. “Whenever you get a chance.”
“Will do. And you can use my truck while I’m gone to get around if you want.”
I chuckled a little as I heard Big Paw ask Grams, “When did they get so close?”
“You’re always sleeping through things, Harry. Missing the things right in your face,” she said.
Big Paw grumbled a bit and scratched his beard. “We better get a move on if we’re going to make it to the airport in a few hours.”
It was a long, long drive to the closest airport, which meant we had to leave earlier than I would’ve liked.
A little more time with Hazel and Grams wouldn’t have been awful.
How was I already getting homesick when I hadn’t even left?
I nodded once toward Big Paw and then gave Grams and Hazel one last embrace.
I opened the passenger door of the truck and began to climb into my seat.
“Ian, wait!”
I looked to my left and saw Hazel come rushing toward me.
She leaped into my arms and pressed her lips against mine. I kissed her hard and deep, wishing I’d never have to let her go.
“I’m gonna miss you, Ian. When you make it big, don’t forget about us small-town folks, okay?”
“I couldn’t forget you if I tried. Besides, I’m going to be calling you each morning and every night,” I swore.
She bit her bottom lip. “I don’t know how that would even work, Ian. You’re going to be so busy with your life and—”
“We make time for the things that matter,” I said, cutting her off. “You’re a thing that matters.”
Her head lowered for a split second, and when she looked back up, she was wearing that smile I loved. I kissed her again. For the first time in my life, the music wasn’t the only thing I truly cared about.
“Thanks, Haze.”
“For what?”
“Teaching me how to feel again.”
“What in the damn hell was that?” Big Paw barked.
Grams waved off his annoyed tones. “Oh, hush, you old fart. Let kids be kids. I remember a certain boy who used to kiss me like that too.”
“Who was it?” Big Paw sneered. “I’ll kick his ass.”
Grams chuckled and shook her head. “Shh. Now, get a move on before you miss his flight and he’ll have to come back and kiss Hazel again.”
That lit a spark under Big Paw’s butt, and he hurried over to the driver’s seat.
I waved goodbye one last time before Big Paw put the truck into drive.
I watched the two ladies wave to me through the sideview mirror until they were out of sight.
The ride to the airport was pretty quiet. Big Paw and I weren’t big on talking, and the silence didn’t bother me at all. My mind was too busy thinking about the future and the past. When we pulled up to the airport, he helped me toss my suitcases out of the back. I grabbed my guitar case and sat it down on the curbside so I could say my final goodbye.
Big Paw kept scratching his beard. “Ian, look, I know I ain’t good with words like your grandmother. She is much more emotional than most people, and well, she always says the right thing. That’s not me, so I’m going to say what I need to say and get it out of the way.”
He shifted around the baseball cap on his head before stuffing his hands into his pockets. He cleared his throat. “You’ve been a pain in my ass since you were a kid.”
Not the goodbye speech I was hoping for.
“It’s true.” He nodded. “You’ve been a fucking pain in my goddamn ass. Throughout your whole childhood, you pushed my buttons. You acted out and gave me every gray hair on my head.”
“Is this supposed to be an inspirational goodbye, because—”
“Just shut your hole and let me finish, all right?” he barked.
“Yes, sir.”
He shifted his feet side to side before pinching the bridge of his nose. When he locked eyes with mine, his stare was filled with tears, and I swore I hadn’t ever seen my grandfather cry. “I just want you to know that you got all those characteristics from me. The good, the bad, and the messed-up parts. You’re a mirror of your old man, Ian, and I wouldn’t want you to be anything other than who you are. So you go out to Los Angeles, and you give them fucking hell, okay? You be a pain in their ass like the damn devil you are. Push their buttons. Push the whole world’s buttons until you get that dream of yours. You get that success, and you hold on tight to it. Don’t you dare look back to this place until you truly need to, but when you need to look back, we’ll be here waiting.”
Damn . . .
Now I was crying.
I sniffled a bit and nodded. “Yes, sir. I promise.”
“Good. Now come on. Let’s get this mopey crap over with.” He held his arms out toward me and pulled me into a hug. I held on to him, and I missed him before I even let go. “I’m proud of you, son,” he softly said before letting me go. “Now go. Go be a rock star.”
I picked up my guitar case and grabbed the handles of my suitcases. As I walked into the airport, a small part of me wanted to turn around and look back, but I didn’t.
Looking back wasn’t an option. From here on out, I only looked forward.
24
HAZEL
The colors of fall painted the leaves of Eres, and it wasn’t long before summer moved out and autumn came crashing onto the scene. I spent the next few weeks trying hard to keep busy on the ranch.
When Big Paw called me to his office, I was just as nervous as the first day I’d met him. Even though over the past few months, we’d grown closer—in a Big Paw kind of way, which still felt not close at all—he still scared me a little.
“Sit down, Hazel,” he told me with his gruff voice, chewed cigar hanging from his mouth.