No. He couldn’t allow it to happen. Not only did his desires have no place around a younger girl with a brighter future, but he hadn’t lied to Lucy. Lying was a deal-breaker with him. For the first time, he welcomed a bitter memory that he normally kept hidden under lock and key, hoping it would serve as a distraction. His ex-fiancée’s utter horror over his “disgusting” needs. Her seeking comfort from his best friend. It had all rushed to the surface last night when he found out Lucy lied to him. After exposing himself to her the way he’d done, it had felt like the worst kind of betrayal. It’s why he was so careful about who he spent time with, who he could actually call a friend. Once you’ve been burned, that shit didn’t come easy anymore.
Had the lie stopped him from wanting Lucy? Hell no. If anything, he wanted to find her this minute and punish her in a way that ended in her screaming his name. He wanted it so bad, his hands shook. The urge was painful to deny, especially knowing she would wrap that limber body around him and tell him to give it to her hard. Fuck. He had to stop thinking about her now or work would be impossible. Loss of focus in his line of work was tantamount to failure, and he refused to fail at his job.
Matt stowed his neatly folded street clothes in his locker just as Brent rounded the corner, followed by Daniel Chase, his other best friend. The newest member of their group, Troy Bennett, trailed behind, giving Matt a quick nod that he wordlessly returned. Matt had a hard enough time keeping two friends at a comfortable distance. He hadn’t quite gotten around to figuring out how to fit Troy into his organized blueprint. Thankfully, Troy seemed just as content to maintain their casual acquaintance, not pushing for anything more.
He transferred his attention to Daniel, who had a look of exasperation on his face, which was usually the case any time he’d been talking to Brent.
When Brent caught sight of Matt, he did a double take. “Hey, dickhead. You just disappeared on us last night. You’re lucky I don’t have the ability to be insulted.”
Daniel stripped off his shirt and threw it into his locker. “Yeah, you bailed before Story and I even got there. What gives?”
Matt started to answer with some vague excuse about being tired, but caught sight of the thin red scratch marks on Daniel’s back first. Brent noticed at the same time and they exchanged a look. “What happened to your back, bro?
Daniel looked momentarily confused by the question, then he grinned. “Ah. It turns out my girl gets a little crazy after a few glasses of pink champagne. Didn’t even make it in the door. Take note, gentlemen.”
“Why, Daniel, you filthy animal.”
Even though he felt like shit joking around with Brent after what had transpired with his sister, Matt couldn’t help but be amused. “Maybe you should buy stock in the company.”
Daniel pointed at him. “I like the way you think.”
“All right, idea man. Enough stalling.” Brent tugged his king-size Kevlar vest over his head. “Did you bail because of my sister, or what?”
Matt froze in the process of securing his locker. “Excuse me?”
“Lucy’s accordion playing.” Brent snickered. “She’s been known to clear a room.”
Actually, everything about her performance had been adorable. Her obvious nerves, the soft, husky quality of her voice as she sang in French. She’d practically sparkled. Such a parallel to his shadowed life, he could do nothing but stare, feeling ashamed of himself. He’d taken that girl, the blushing girl with curls framing her face, and used her to slake a need she had no business even being aware of. That thought had finally sent him out the door, needing to escape the reminder of what he’d done. How he wanted to do it again. And again.
Then she’d followed him and every self-issued warning had gone flying out the window in a matter of seconds.
Troy saved him from having to answer. “Why did you ask her to play if she’s so terrible?”
“See, that’s how this sibling thing works. I embarrass her because I love her.” Brent strapped on his belt. “Don’t worry, she’s already thinking of a way to get me back. Let’s just hope it doesn’t involve burning my house down.”
Or fucking your best friend blind. Feeling nauseous, Matt considered the possibility that Lucy might have seduced him to irritate her brother, but just as quickly, discarded the notion. She might have lied to him, but you couldn’t fake their kind of chemistry. Or the way her body had responded under his treatment. Christ. Stop thinking about her.
Brent wasn’t finished talking about his sister, however. “I should be getting a call any time now to come bail her out. Maybe turn on the news and see her bungee jumping from the Chrysler Building.”
Matt frowned into his locker. That didn’t sound like the girl he’d spent the day with. A double major at Syracuse. Smart and logical, with an amazing sense of humor. A girl with job opportunities lined up. A detailed itinerary for her week in the city. Then I heard you call me a nuisance…and I guess I just wanted to be someone who didn’t inspire irritation. Just for one day. Sympathy stirred inside him before he ground it to a halt. No way would he feel sympathy for her. Anger, yes. Lust, hell yes. But he wouldn’t feel sorry for her. Not after she lied.
Daniel laughed. “She’s still up to her old tricks?”
“Actually, she’s been quiet lately. Must be gearing up for a big explosion.” Brent slammed his locker shut and twisted the lock. “I haven’t met her friend Sasha, who she brought with her from Syracuse, though. Maybe she’s the good influence.” He tipped his chin toward Matt. “You gave her a ride. What’s she like, Matty?”
Matt’s eyes slid shut and he fought the sudden urge to punch his locker. Lucy obviously hadn’t told Brent she’d come alone. Why? He didn’t know. Nor did he understand the wave of uneasiness that came with the knowledge that she’d be alone in the city all week. He only knew he was being dragged into her lie now. Making him something he hated. Unless he came clean now. Intending to do just that, he turned. Brent watched him expectantly, perpetually goofy smile in place. Matt couldn’t do it. Maybe if he hadn’t dragged her into a doorway last night and said all manner of dirty things to her, knowing full well who she was, he could have done it. But he had. He even wanted her again, despite her identity. And he didn’t belong anywhere near her.
“Jesus, Matt. You were born in the wrong era.” Brent finished tying the lace of his boot. “You would have made one hell of a silent film star.”
All four of them received an emergency page at the same time. Matt breathed a sigh of relief as they holstered their weapons quickly and left the locker room. His mind should have been on the situation they were heading into.
Instead, he thought about the itinerary Lucy had accidentally left in his car.
…
Lucy picked a spot off to the side of the gathering crowd and spread her blanket down on the grass. She thought she’d gotten to Bryant Park early enough to get a better view, but it was fifteen minutes before the outdoor screening of Back to the Future was set to begin and the entire lawn was packed. Couples and groups of friends munched on popcorn or hot dogs; some moviegoers were even sneaking covert sips from brown paper bags. Evening had just fallen and the buzz of excited conversation made Lucy smile. She might be alone, but with so many people around, it didn’t feel quite as lonely as she’d expected. The last six years of her life had been spent hunching over a textbook in a deathly silent library. There was no comparison.