“Because I’m just as mad at my dad. He’s the one who checked out. He hasn’t even tried to have a solid relationship with me. At least my mom attempts to connect, even if it’s for a shitty reason.” A billowing heat rises in my chest as anger starts to crest. “What do they expect me to do? Come home for winter break and act like everything’s okay? My mom said I could split time between the two places, but where the fuck am I supposed to sleep? On the couch? When some girl I don’t even know takes my bed?” Another tear slips down my face. “They’re both starting new lives . . . without me.”
“Indie,” he says on a sigh and tries to pull me onto his lap.
“No. Okay, Lincoln? I don’t want to be comforted, I want . . .” My lip trembles and my mind freezes on me. I want an escape. I want out of my head. I don’t want to think anymore. I need to check out.
I sit up on my knees and pull my shirt over my head, revealing my bare chest. Lincoln’s eyes go wide and when I reach for him to lie down, he puts his hand out, holding me in place.
“Indie, I’m not going to have sex with you right now. Not when you’re so upset.”
“I don’t need you to baby me, Lincoln. I need you to fuck me.”
“And I’m not going to fuck you when you’re not in a good headspace. We don’t use each other like that.”
Covering my breasts, I say, “Then just leave.” I point to the door, emotions bubbling up so fast that I can’t control the torrent of tears taking over.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he says, pulling me down on the bed with him, curling me into his chest. I resist it at first, but when he rubs my back soothingly, I melt into his side and cry.
I cry hard.
I finally let months of resentment pour out of me.
And Lincoln holds me the entire time.
Never moving.
Only pulling me in tighter as sobs wrack my body.
He kisses the top of my head when I finally calm down. “You matter. You realize that, Indie? You matter to a lot of people and the empty feelings you have right now, feeling like you’re being replaced, like you don’t matter . . . aren’t true. Do you hear me?” When I don’t say anything, he squeezes me tighter, his voice growing rough. “You fucking matter, Indie.”
I nod, unable to stop the onslaught of tears.
“You fucking matter,” he repeats.
I don’t know how long we lie there until we both drift off to sleep, forgetting about the pizza and anything else that’s happening in the world. It’s just me and Lincoln.
My rock.
Chapter Eighteen
LINCOLN
JANUARY
Buzzing and fucking horny as hell, I sprint up Indie’s staircase and throw her door open only to find her completely naked and spread out on her bed.
“Jesus,” I mutter, tearing my shirt off and tossing it to the floor.
She giggles and says, “Shut the door.”
I kick it closed and then quickly strip down to nothing. I reach into the back pocket of my jeans and pull out an accordion of condoms that nearly touch the floor. She laughs even harder.
“Miss me?” she asks.
“Like you can’t even believe,” I say, flinging myself on her bed and tackling her. My lips find hers, and I’m reminded why I’ve been so goddamn thirsty for this girl ever since Christmas Eve.
Her mouth is magic.
Her body is fire.
And her touch is an addiction to me, something I crave every goddamn second of the day.
After Indie told me what was going on with her shitty parents, things were awkward between us for a few days. I felt her pulling away, but I didn’t let that happen. I couldn’t, not when she was feeling so broken, not after she made me make that promise. Because that promise felt like the finale to what we were doing, and I didn’t like that at all. It didn’t feel good. Didn’t settle well. So, I kept pushing, making sure she didn’t hide in a hole and eventually, the gray clouds looming over her cleared, and I started to see my girl again. Well, a slightly more cynical Indie.
She spent most of her winter break at school. Scarlett stayed with her until a few days before Christmas, and then she flew out to see her parents. I had to go home right after finals were over because it was my last Christmas before the draft, and my moms wanted time with me, something Indie understood completely. I was missing her like crazy during the break so when she showed up at my doorstep on Christmas Eve with her present, I was more than ecstatic.
And her present . . . a mind-blowing blow job in my Jeep. I got home in a daze, pretty sure my moms knew exactly what had gone down.
Indie spent Christmas with her mom, slept on the couch like she thought she would, then went to her dad’s—didn’t use the indoor pool—and then drove back to school. I hated knowing that she was there alone, but she said she was good. She trained and worked on her footwork.
When I got back to campus today, I was nervous to see where her head was at but when she told me to get my ass over to her apartment, I went.
And finding her on her bed, a smile on her face, the happy Indie I’ve grown to know shining back at me? I’ve never felt more relieved in my life.
“God, you taste good,” I say, moving my lips down her neck to her collarbone.
“Condom now,” she mutters.
I tear one off the sleeve and then quickly sheath myself. Then she’s up on all fours, sticking her ass in the air.
“Christ,” I mutter, gripping her hips and moving behind her. “Are you ready, babe?”
I move my fingers over her arousal and feel how slick she is. Oh fuck, she’s ready.
“Yes, Lincoln. Please,” she begs.
I position my cock at her entrance and push forward, slamming into her. We both let out a loud groan as I fill her up.
“Is Scarlett here?” I ask, pained.
“No. Scream all you want.”
I chuckle and start moving in and out of her, using her hips as a guide.
“God, I missed this,” I say. “The way your pussy clenches around my cock so perfectly. So good, Indie.”
I thrust harder and am already feeling the tickle of my orgasm up the backs of my legs.
Indie moves her hand between her legs, and even though I like to do the work for her, if this is what she needs—she’s that ready—fuck, she can get do whatever she wants. I love that about her.
“How does that feel?” I ask her.
“Amazing. Oh my God, so good.” Her hands fall to the bed where she braces herself. “Oh Jesus, Linc, I’m almost there. Right there.”
“Me too,” I say, my heavy breath making it hard to talk. Shit, this was fast. Faster than expected.
I lean over her back and grab one of her tits as I continue to slam into her. With skillful fingers, I roll her nipple and pinch it, extracting a sharp hiss from her and causing her pussy to contract around my cock.
“Fuck, yes,” I grunt, doing it again and again until she’s panting and crying out my name, her orgasm ripping through her as mine tightens and sends me into another world.
I’m still behind her, my cock twitching inside her.
“Too good,” I mumble. “Way too fucking good.”