“We are going. I’ll decide tomorrow what my sin will be. Whether I sell you or claim you as my own. I expect you in bed within the hour, or you will have more than one punishment. Don’t try to run; I won’t be the only one who hunts you.”
And then I leave, knowing within minutes, Siren will be in my bed next to me, hating me. Her hatred is for the best. Tomorrow I will commit a sin; it just isn’t the sin Siren’s expecting.
19
Siren
I didn’t sleep—not for a single second. I don’t think Zeke slept either, although he never opened his eyes. His body tossed and turned in the bed as much as mine did. There was no snoring, no slow steady-rhythm breathing, no lifeless slumber.
We didn’t sleep.
But we didn’t talk either.
We didn’t share our racing thoughts.
But Zeke didn’t have to ask to know what I was thinking. He knows I’m terrified of Julian; he just doesn’t know why. And he’s not going to know why. Even if I end up going to Julian’s tonight, Zeke is still going to be clueless as to the truth. But tonight could change everything for me—and it terrifies me.
As soon as dawn starts shining in through the bare windows, Zeke jumps out of bed. The room may be beautiful, but there is no way to sleep in, not when there aren’t any curtains to keep the light out.
He doesn’t speak to me as he walks down the hallway to the bathroom. I hear the flick of the water on.
And I carefully climb out of bed. When I hear the shower door open, I know now is my chance.
I need to run.
It’s the only way I can stay safe.
If I start running, I will always be running.
Julian and Zeke will always be chasing me.
But I’d rather run the rest of my life than be ruined forever.
I tiptoe quickly through the house until I get to the back door. I don’t want to run out the front. The front door leads to Julian; the beach and the ocean are to the back.
My plan is to swim out into the ocean and let the current carry me toward the pier where I can steal a boat and get off this island forever.
I open the door carefully, yet it screeches a little. The sliding door is rusty and in need of some WD40. But I can still hear the faint sound of the shower in the distance.
I take a deep breath, and then I run. Stripping my clothes down to my bra and underwear as I go. Down the steps. Across the beach. And into the water.
My safety.
My peaceful place.
My sanctuary.
The waves splash against my face as I sprint further into the water, and the feelings of security consume me. My plan will work. I’ll be safe, at least for tonight. Tomorrow, I’ll deal with the consequences of my decision. I just can’t go to Julian’s. I’d rather die than go back there.
Finally, I’m far enough out into the ocean that I can barely keep my head above the water as I wade. I dive under, feeling the connection to the water. I kick hard…once, twice, three times before I surface again and start breast-stroking down the beach. Each time I take a breath, I feel more alive than the previous. This is where I belong, chasing waves, not running from monsters.
Why didn’t I do this the first night Zeke bought me?
Because as freeing as this feels, I’m also sealing my fate—I’m not really free. This is temporary. I have a lot of work left to do to make this permanent.
I dip back under the water, but this time I don’t move with the wave. I’m jerked back by my ankle.
When I surface, I find myself pulled tightly against Zeke’s shirtless body. I pant heavily, but I don’t know if it’s from the physical exertion or being so close to Zeke’s body.
When I realize I’m not fighting, I push hard against him. He can’t take me back. He can’t take me to Julian.
But as soon as I break free, he grabs my wrist again, pulling me to him harder than ever. His force and our tension bruise my wrist.
“You’re mine, Siren. I get to decide your fate, your future, your present.”
“No,” I pull hard, but his grip doesn’t change. He’s stronger than I will ever be. It doesn’t stop me from fighting with everything that I have. “Let me go.”
“No,” he growls, pulling me up out of the water by my wrist until we are eye to eye.
He’s pissed. Scared. Angry. I’ve never seen him so emotional before.
I stop fighting at his expression.
I’m not even sure I can breathe anymore without his permission.
“You. Are. Mine. You will follow my orders.”
I nod, silently surrendering to him. My plan failed. I give in. And if Zeke didn’t already have my fate planned out, he knows now. He can read on my face what will happen if he sells me to Julian.
“It’s for your own good,” he says so quietly that I’m not sure I even heard him.
I shake my head. Zeke has no idea what he is sentencing me to. He drags me through the water back to the beach. He doesn’t stop. He doesn’t breathe hard. He walks like he’s walking on a treadmill, not dragging my ass through waves and sand.
When we reach the shore, Zeke throws me down harshly onto the sand. I fall, twisting, landing on my back, and my impact covers me in coarse sand. I’m only wearing my bra and panties, and I don’t care what parts of me Zeke can see. This moment is the furthest thing from sexual.
Zeke stands over me, like the god he thinks he is. He may not have physically hurt me yet, but one way or another, I will be injured by the end of the night. Either Zeke will decide he wants me, in which case he will finally use me, or he’ll sell me to Julian. And I’ll get wounded worse than anything Zeke could ever imagine doing to me.
I close my eyes to keep the tears at bay. Running was a mistake. There is no way I was getting off this island, not when Julian owns every boat here. My only chance is Zeke. Him keeping me. He may only have a sliver of a heart, but at least he still has a piece of one. He may try to rape me, abuse me, torture me. But Zeke doesn’t have Julian’s experience. With Zeke, I have a chance at escaping. With Julian, I’ll be dead by the end of the week.
“Don’t sell me,” I whisper.
Zeke doesn’t answer. He doesn’t flinch. He’s not moved by my sobs.
Come—he commands with his body as he walks off. He doesn’t even bother to speak to me.
My head falls as I push myself up off the sand. Running right now would only exhaust me. Zeke would catch me again, and bruise my other wrist. If Zeke is going to sell me to Julian, then I need all of my strength to fight my new enemy.
So I follow Zeke’s command and accept my fate.
The rest of the day sludges by. We don’t talk to each other. We eat in silence. And I spend most of the day in the shower, getting all my tears out and letting warmth sear my body. Once I’m inside Julian’s house again, I’ll be flooded with freezing fear.
I wear the most conservative, unflattering clothes I can find when I do finally get dressed. My baggiest jeans, tennis shoes, and an oversized sweatshirt. Even though it’s warm outside, I need as many layers of protection as I can get. I wear my hair up in a high ponytail, using one of Zeke’s scrunchies. At the last minute, I spot Zeke’s razor next to the sink. I slip one of the blades out and into my back pocket. It’s not much, but at least it’s a weapon.