Baz chuckles without humor, growing closer. “Oh, it isn’t? Because it looks to me like you’re sneaking around and digging through my shit, Mackenzie. You’ve been doing it for weeks. And now,” he warns, crowding me into the wall, “you’re going to tell me what you’ve been searching for.”
“I … I w-was—”
“Speak up!” he barks, and I flinch, the first tear slipping down my cheek.
“I’m writing a p-piece on the lives of SoCal’s most eligible bachelors,” I lie. Again. I should’ve come clean with the truth, but not now, not like this.
“And there it is,” he breathes, tone cold and detached. He takes a step back, out of my space, as if he can’t stand to be near me a second longer. I must be insane because I almost want to reach out to him and beg him not to go.
My heart splinters with pain, and my chest tightens. I don’t know how this whole situation got so fucked up.
“So I was your target? Your first bachelor in your long list of many? Or was it just me and my friends you wanted the scoop on?”
He’s not wrong. And I hate that I can’t defend myself. I can’t stand the idea of him seeing me as a user.
Tears slip down my cheeks, and I do reach out for him this time. “You don’t understand. Our first meeting, it was real, Baz. I had no idea who you were. It was always them. I went to that club to get information. For my piece. You were never in any of the photographs with them. I didn’t know you were a part of any of this. That night was real. I promise you.”
The way he glares down at me with disgust written all over his face makes it hard to breathe. It feels like everything is caving in. There’s this unbearable weight on my chest. A vise squeezing around my heart and lungs, making me sick.
“Let’s say I believe you. When did you decide to use me?”
My face crumples, and I suck in the sob that’s threatening to escape. “When I came back to LA,” I whisper, suddenly ashamed of myself.
Baz searches my expression, and without a word, he turns on his heel toward the door. I jolt, dodging the mess I made to go after him.
“Wait, Baz, please don’t go!” He pauses. Every part of his body is stiff and wound tightly as if he’s barely restraining himself. “I never wanted to hurt you. You have to believe that,” I choke through the tears streaming down my face.
“I don’t have to believe anything, Mackenzie.”
He starts walking again, and this time, I grip onto his arm. “Wait, please.”
He shrugs off my hold.
“See yourself out.” Once he passes over the threshold, he shoots me a glare. “Don’t ever show your face at any of my resorts, Mackenzie. You’re no longer welcome here.”
He disappears, and the sobs I was desperately holding back break free. I drop to my knees, letting the tears come fast and hard. Gut-wrenching sobs fill the space around me, echoing off the walls and the mess I’ve made of his office.
Oh, God.
What have I done?
All of this for nothing.
With my face in my hands, I hear my sister tsking me, telling me what a failure I am.
“I told you this would happen, Kenzie. Did you really think you’d be able to keep him? After all your lies and deceit?”
“I did it for you!” I sob out angrily.
“There’s still work to be done. The money, Mackenzie? Why does he have so much money? And the safe? You have work to do still.”
Feeling lightheaded and unsteady, I push to my feet, forcing myself to get it together long enough to gather whatever possessions I have left in Baz’s penthouse. I don’t know if he’ll even be in there, but in case he is, I wipe the tears from my face and pull myself together as best as I can.
When I push inside, I pause over the threshold, suddenly feeling like an outsider who doesn’t belong here.
I guess I never really did.
I make my way into his bedroom and freeze when I glance at the dark silhouette on the bed. Baz is resting on the edge, a blunt hanging out of the corner of his mouth. He looks up at me and smirks.
“Came to see what else you could find, Mackenzie?” he taunts.
I flinch, my chin quivering with emotion.
“I just came to get my stuff.” My voice doesn’t even sound like mine. Baz doesn’t say anything, just takes a hit, watching me as I finally move toward the walk-in closet. It’s a struggle not to break down as I gather everything, but I refuse to look any weaker than I already do in front of him.
With one suitcase trailing me, my other still in my suite on the tenth floor, I pause when our gazes clash. Everything about his posture and outward expression remains cold and aloof, but as I stare into his eyes, I see I’ve hurt him. The one thing I wanted to avoid, and I did it anyway.
I open my mouth to tell him how sorry I am again, but I know it won’t help. So I snap my mouth shut, tighten my grip on my luggage and start to walk away. My feet suddenly halt midstride, just over the threshold of his bedroom.
“I know you don’t owe me any explanations, but why do you have all that money?’
“Plan on using my answer in your piece?” he counters, and my lips thin.
“You were never a part of my piece. They were.”
“I was merely a pawn, right?”
My face falls. “You’re more to me than a pawn. You’ve become my safe place, Baz. I’ve told you things I’ve never told anyone.”
That crease between his brows is back again. He takes a drag from his blunt and pinches it between his fingers, looking back up at me.
“You want the truth? Here’s a story for you and your piece, Mackenzie,” he drawls, pushing to his feet, striding toward me with a lazy, cavalier posture. He stops a few inches in front of me. It’s close enough I have to crane my neck back to stare at him.
“That money? It was extortion money. Zach and Vincent were being extorted with pictures of the two doing coke and other drugs. It’s not a shocker they’re playboys or party guys, but seeing as we had a business opening together, they came to me with their problems, just like they always do, and I took care of it. Took care of the extortionist and kept the money in my desk if he ever tried to come around again. People like that don’t play by the rules, but I still saved the money in case. Is that what you wanted to use in your piece? SoCal’s hottest playboys and club owners are druggies? Go ahead. Use it. I don’t give a shit. Just as long as I don’t have to see you again.”
My heart shatters. It’s laying at my feet in a million jagged pieces.
That’s it? That’s the big secret he’s been hiding?
“And the safe?” I choke.
Baz leans into me. He tucks an errant strand from my bun behind my ear. His fingers graze the skin of my cheek in the process. I find myself leaning into his touch, craving him and hating myself all in one breath.
“It’s for important documents. Social security card, passport, jewelry. Everything I have to keep hidden from vultures like you.”
My eyes spring open at his harsh words, and his severe face swims before me. God, what have I done?
I should’ve kept him out of this. I just ruined every beautiful thing I shared with this man over passports and extortionists. And none of it had anything to do with my sister.