She continued laughing for a few moments before she realized what had happened and then she threw her arms around his neck and pushed her tongue down his throat.
Joey had a crush on Danny since the first day they met.
She wanted to ask him out right there and then but this was high school and she was too shy and inexperienced and thought that becoming friends would make it easier.
Little did she know that it would actually complicate the matter.
Danny had liked her since before she even said hi to him. He had seen her around school and he liked her quiet way of being. He also liked her dark eyeshadow and the fact that she drew stars in blue pen on her sneakers.
But the closer that they became as friends, the harder it was for him to make a move.
What if she wasn’t interested in him like that?
What then?
Would their friendship survive his crush?
Danny decided to wait, either for his fear to subside or his courage to multiply.
And then one moment when she was laughing hysterically, with her hair falling into her face and her eyes closed, he just went for it.
He’d tried to do this before but his fear had always stopped him.
Not this time.
This time, he just took a step closer to her and let his mouth do the rest.
35
When Joey got into New Mexico, that was the first time that she had seen the purple mountain majesty.
The hills surrounded the road on both sides, rising high and almost kissing the impossibly blue sky.
The earth was reddish brown, to match the setting sun and the views took her breath away.
Driving through Albuquerque, she fell in love with the salmon-colored highway and the turquoise blue overpasses.
The cloudless sky that allowed the sun to shine brightly lifted whatever worries she was carrying. It was almost as though she had left everything in her past somewhere out east and she could start her life over out here.
When she got to Phoenix and saw her first saguaro cactus towering over the desert floor with its thick round branches reaching up to the heavens, she pulled the car over for a closer look.
Examining its delicate fruit and the protective spines, she decided that from now on she would never be Josephine Rose Reyes again.
Her new name would Joey Lebold and if she didn’t like California then she would come back to Arizona and live there.
The baby kicked and she placed her hand on top of her belly and told her of her plans out loud, so that she would hear.
This seemed to soothe her because the kicking stopped and she moved so that she wouldn’t be pressing up so hard against Joey’s esophagus, giving her heartburn.
If only Danny were here, she thought and wiped away a tear. She couldn’t think about him too much because that was when the waterworks would start.
Unfortunately, the tears were not just due to the hormones. Danny was supposed to be there. They were supposed to be taking this trip and starting their lives together.
And if it weren’t for that accident then they would be.
When they first found out that she was pregnant, they were terrified. They had used protection but one time the condom broke and she couldn’t get the morning-after pill without a prescription and she couldn’t get a prescription without going to the doctor.
She couldn’t go to the doctor without her parents finding out.
So, they just prayed that it would turn out okay.
Of course, it didn’t.
And after?
She wasn’t sure what to do or what she even wanted to do.
Danny was as scared as she was so they did what teenagers often do, waited until the problem went away.
Only, it didn’t go away.
Her stomach kept getting bigger and after a while their decision was made for them.
That was when Danny asked her to marry him.
She said yes and he put a ring on her finger.
That was before they told his mom who kicked them both out of the house. That was before they told her parents who forced her to remove the ring from her finger, called their family physician for an emergency house call, and kicked Danny out of the house.
Her parents insisted on an abortion and forbid her from ever seeing Danny again.
His mom told him she hadn’t worked her butt off her whole life providing for a kid who would throw his whole future away on some trashy girl.
She said that the only way she would permit him back into her house was if he dumped Joey and never saw the baby.
That was when Danny and Joey made their own plans.
They were going to run away together.
They were going to get married in Vegas and they were going to start their lives away from their awful parents who didn’t understand a thing about love or family.
They were going to sneak out in the middle of the night and drive Danny’s car for hours to get as far away from there as possible.
But when Joey waited out on the curb with her bags, Danny didn’t show up.
She waited for hours and then finally called his house around eight that morning.
His mother picked up.
She was sobbing and Joey could barely make out a thing she was saying.
Later that morning, she learned that Danny was dead.
He had died, earlier that night, in a car accident when someone rear-ended him and pushed him into traffic.
Later, after the funeral, a police officer took Joey aside and, after a few questions, revealed that Danny had two suitcases with him with everything he owned in the world.
He had not stood her up.
He had died on his way to running away with her.
That was when Joey made the decision to not stand him up either.
Two weeks later, she put their plan into action and three weeks later, she saw the sign welcoming her into California.
36
Nicholas
Afterward…
I walk out of the hotel a broken man.
I wanted more time to explain but deep down what I really wanted was more time to convince her that I didn’t betray her.
But would more time make her understand?
What exactly am I trying to convince her of?
That somehow I didn’t meet with an FBI agent and report to him on her brother?
That we didn’t steal that painting in order to help me, not us?
I have told her too many lies.
They have finally caught up with me and because I never told her I love her, now she’ll never know the truth.
I get into my car and start driving.
I don’t know where, but it feels good to just be going.
Besides Olive I don’t need anything else here.
I can get my fake identification sent to me wherever I am.
No one is looking for me yet, and I have some time.
Maybe I have too much time and too many options.
I watch the white abbreviated lines between the lanes disappear under my car.
The world becomes a blur, but I keep driving.
Where do I go now?
Where do I go from here?
Will we ever see each other again?
***