“I know,” she reminded me from behind.
It was difficult to dislike Dr. Conway. Since day one, she’d grown on me. Even when I’d thought I doubted her and couldn’t trust her, she’d proved she truly cared, being the only acting parental figure who pushed my limits and had been there every step of the way. I was going to miss her.
On my way back to fourth wing, Jake, Tyler, and Bria blew past me with cringed features. Well, except for Jake, that is. His eyes betrayed his disgusted expression, and I knew he missed me. But around Tyler and Bria, he wouldn’t dare defy his loyalty. I had to get him alone and talk to him.
I knocked on Ollie’s door before opening and found him asleep in his bed with a book sprawled out over his stomach. Gently, I lifted the book and set it aside before melting beside him. Ollie hummed, wrapping his arms around me, burrowing his head into my neck.
I dove my hand under his shirt and trailed my fingers over the surface of his warm skin.
“Conway give you the third degree again?” he asked, his breath brushing my neck.
Goosebumps flared, and I leaned into him with a small laugh. “Always.”
“She’s right, you know … ”—His arm pulled me closer— “You can become anything you want, and you choose to do nothing. It’s a waste if you ask me.”
“Wonderful. You too?”
Ollie pulled away and opened his sleepy eyes. “No. Conway has different reasons, then I do. Me? I believe everyone is sent to earth with a clear path.” He wiped a hand over his eyes. “What interests you, love?”
“I’m not so sure anymore.”
“Your body tells you every day of what you’re meant for. Any time you get goosebumps, never ignore them. Your body reminded you to take notice in case your brain didn’t get the message.”
“So, I’m meant for you? I wonder what major that falls under.”
His smile grew. “Give me your hand.” I lifted from under the thin sheet and held it out in front of me. Ollie’s hand disappeared from my waist. His fingertips touched mine and continued to trace down the length of my palm. Shivers rushed through me, and Ollie smiled. “You feel that?” I bit my lip and nodded. His fingers continued, merely brushing over mine, but the faintness alone sent the small hairs standing straight. “It will feel like this, and you will know it’s what you’re meant for. Don’t ever question it.”
“Is that how you feel about writing?”
Ollies fingers laced through mine and he brought our hands close to his chest. “Yes. I feel that way when I write, and I feel that way when you’re near. Even when the demons take me, my soul always remembers.” His lips landed over my forehead, and he lingered there for a moment before he pulled away. “but you never felt that way about playing the piano, have you?”
I shook my head. “How did you know?”
“Because if you did, you’d be playing all the time.”
“I guess I’m just not cut out for this life.”
“Or maybe you need to see things from a different perspective.” Ollie’s boyish grin returned, and his mischievous eyes bounced between mine. “I got you something. It’s under the bed.” I opened my mouth to speak, but my tongue wouldn’t work. “Go on.” He nudged his head.
I flipped the other way, reached under the bed, and waved my hand around until it grabbed hold of something. When I pulled it out, I laid back and took a look at it.
A camera.
And not your average camera.
A machine of some sort I had no idea how to use. “Ollie?”
“Another perspective, love. It may help you see the world a little differently.”
I sat up and crawled over him, pulling the camera over my face to look through the lens. “Nope. You’re just as beautiful, but I prefer the real thing. And how in the world did you find this?”
Ollie’s hands clutched my hips, and his eyes beamed up at me. “You’re smiling. You like it.”
“How, Ollie?”
“I asked a friend,” his head tilted into his shrug, “It doesn’t matter. Come here, let’s take our first picture, yeah?” His fingers dug into my hips, and I curled over, severely ticklish and falling on top of him. Ollie grabbed the camera from my hands and held it above our heads, snapping the picture before I had a chance to be ready for it.
When I looked back up, the film came from the top and Ollie dropped the camera beside him on the mattress and held the picture over us. We both looked up, waiting. “You didn’t let me get ready.”
“Ready? You mean a fake smile? No. I had to get the real one.” He fanned the film, and the picture came into focus. “You see there?” The picture showed my head over Ollie’s chest with a cheesy smile plastered on my face as he looked down on me. “Breathtaking.”
“Black and white?”
He shook his head. “There’s enough color between us, don’t you think?”
“Yeah,” I said through an exhale as I looked up in awe at the first photo we’d ever taken.
“I’m keeping this one.” He stuffed the picture under his pillow and turned to face me. “The rest is yours. Take as many pictures as you want, I have a box of film at your disposal. See if you can find inspiration somewhere.”
After taking a few more pictures, reading a few chapters, and spending the afternoon being lazy in bed like we always seemed to love, Ollie and I walked through the mess hall together and headed straight for the dinner line.
We carried on with our routine, saying goodbye to Zeke and headed for the bathroom early before the rush. The silent battle to see who could brush their teeth the longest was in full effect, and we both spit into the sink at the same time. I hopped up over the sink and took a seat as he turned the water on, both of us moving in sync.
Slowly, students made their way into the bathroom as I sat facing Ollie’s shower stall.
Ethan appeared beside the wall. His expression exhausted and locked eyes with mine. We hadn’t spoken much since I left solitary, and I wondered where he slept or if he slept at all anymore.
“We need to talk,” Jake said, appearing out of nowhere.
I glanced back at Ollie’s stall. “What is there to talk about? You completely shut me out over something you know I didn’t do.”
“I know. I’m starting to realize that now. Bria is a fucking bitch. I can’t stand her anymore.”
“Let me get this straight … ” I snapped my head in his direction. “You and Bria are going through some girly tiff, and now you have no one? Your sudden need to want to talk is beginning to make more sense.”
Jake rolled his eyes and leaned into the counter. “Don’t be like that. I miss you, okay? I know you didn’t mean for that to happen. I know someone is messing with you and has been since the year started. But, come on, Mia. You wrote my secrets down in a journal. Those weren’t yours to write. They were mine. Now Liam won’t even talk to me.” He crossed his arms over his chest and looked out in front of him. “Not only did I lose Liam, but I lost you, too.”
I dropped my chin to my chest and crossed my legs that had been dangling off the counter. “We’re cool. Let’s forget it happened.”