I picked up my crutches and walked—well, limped—Kayla out of my room, and when we entered the living area, Chloe was standing, too, obviously getting ready to leave. She was smiling brightly, and Gabriel was just finishing a sentence, the expression on his face open and happy. Jealousy overcame me again, but I stuffed it down. He’s not mine.
Kayla gave them both a small wave as we moved past, and I hugged her goodbye at the door. When I came back in, Chloe was walking toward me. “Ellie, it was so nice to meet you. I’ll be back tomorrow so I’ll see you then.”
“Oh, okay. I’ll, um, see you then. Nice to meet you, too.”
“Bye, Gabriel.” She smiled at him, and it was tender and full of undeniable affection. I looked away, feeling like I was intruding on a personal moment.
“Bye, Chloe. See you tomorrow.”
He held the door open for her as she passed through, turning and giving us both a small wave before Gabriel shut the door behind her. We stood awkwardly for a second before Gabriel smiled at me in that sweetly bashful way of his.
“It seemed like it went well?” I asked.
“Yeah, it did.” There was happiness in his voice, and it caused a tightening in my chest.
“Good,” I said, clearing my throat when the word came out sounding hoarse. “I, uh, I need to take my medication and then I’m going to take a nap.”
“Okay. You all right? Your visit with Kayla was good?”
“Yeah, yeah, it was good.” I turned and limped toward my room, wanting to be alone, wanting to turn off the emotions running rampant inside of me because I didn’t understand them. Gabriel Dalton was way beyond my league, and I would never have anything lasting with someone like him anyway. Sweet, gentle men like Gabriel Dalton ended up with pretty, respectable girls like Chloe Bryant. And girls like me ended up alone.
* * *
I awoke to a quiet house and tears streaming down my cheeks. I looked frantically around the darkened room, trying to get my bearings.
You’re going the wrong way. You must turn back, sweetness.
The words echoed in my mind, the memory of my mother’s voice causing both grief and joy to crash through me. I hiccupped, bringing myself to a sitting position.
Why did I keep hearing her voice? Why did I keep having that dream? God, it made me feel desperate and lonely.
I pulled myself out of bed and used the bathroom, still hiccupping on the way out. I needed a glass of water. The clock on my bedside table read ten p.m. I opened my door as quietly as possible and listened but didn’t hear any sounds coming from the house. Were Dominic and Gabriel sleeping? I’d make a quick trip to the kitchen and then go right back to my room. I’d been successful at avoiding Dominic around the house, and I wanted to keep it that way.
The water from the tap tasted cool and fresh, and after downing a whole glass, my diaphragm relaxed. I put the glass in the dishwasher and started heading toward my room. As I glanced in the living room, something on the mantel caught my attention, and I walked toward it. Next to a plant sat a small marble sparrow. I ran a finger lightly over it, tilting my head as I took in the fine details, the feathery wings, the small eyes that somehow managed to be soulful, the beak open as if it were singing.
I heard a creak from the floor behind me and whirled around. Gabriel was standing there, having just spotted me as well, his eyes wide with surprise.
He was wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.
I swallowed heavily, my mouth going dry as I took in the masculine beauty of his practically naked body. He was … divine. That was the word that immediately came to mind. Divine. Angelic. Godly.
My gaze soaked in his strong, broad shoulders, the tight, lean muscles of his chest, the taut ripples of his stomach. As if my eyes were drawn to him like a magnet, they moved down his chest to his muscled thighs, his well-formed calves and then back up to his boxers, where the outline of his male anatomy was just barely visible against the thin material.
My core clenched, wetness pooling between my thighs. I blinked, completely unaccustomed to this kind of reaction when it came to a man’s body. I wanted to simultaneously run away and step toward him, to reach out and trail a finger down his chest the way I’d just run a finger over the tiny stone bird.
“My father made that.”
“W-what?” God, my voice sounded too breathy, too stunned.
“The sparrow.”
He crossed his arms over his chest, obviously self-conscious about his state of undress. He gave a quick nod downward. “Sorry, I didn’t know you’d be up.”
Again, my eyes moved to his bare chest. There was a sparse trail of hair under his belly button leading into the waistband of his boxers. My eyes leapt back up to his, and I practically gulped, sure he had heard it when his eyebrows twitched slightly.
I turned my head, my heart beating so loudly in my own ears I was sure he could hear that, too, even from where he stood. “It’s only fair, I suppose,” I murmured.
“What’s that?”
“Now we’ve both seen each other half-naked.”
Gabriel tilted his head, assessing me in some mysterious way. He suddenly turned and walked back toward his room. I stood rooted to the spot, confused, when he returned just as quickly as he’d left, pulling a T-shirt over his head. He walked toward me, coming to stand directly in front of where I stood. His expression was slightly shy, slightly teasing. “I hope … that if we see each other naked again, it won’t be a job, or an accident. It will be because we both want it, and because it means something.”
What?
Visions swirled through my mind, unbidden: tangled limbs and twisted sheets. Heat filled my veins, blood pumping between my legs. It was too much. It was … out of my control and it scared me. I didn’t want to think of Gabriel that way, couldn’t think of Gabriel that way. In truth, had never thought of any man that way. “Mean something?” My voice was a mere whisper.
He nodded, his expression going serious, his eyes filled with sudden gravity. His hand slowly moved up to my hair, and he brushed a piece back from my face. His hand lingered, his knuckle brushing gently down my cheekbone. My breath hitched at the subtle touch. His full lips parted slightly, those angel eyes moving over my features as if he was memorizing me, memorizing the moment. I was spellbound, caught once again in his gaze. No one had ever looked at me the way Gabriel was right then, not in all my life.
“Yes.” It was all he said, leaving me to try to comprehend his meaning. But of course getting naked always meant something. A bribe, a paycheck, a coercion, a means to an end … only I knew very well Gabriel didn’t mean any of those things, and it was impossible to convince myself he could. I already knew better. And I didn’t want to think about what getting naked would mean to Gabriel because the very idea filled me with terror and an aching, needy want. But mostly terror.
I turned back to the sparrow, a jerky movement as I pivoted on my crutches. “Y-your father, he was a stone carver, too?”
“Eloise.”
I clenched my eyes shut, refusing to turn my face back to his. “He was very good.”
Gabriel let out a very small sigh. I didn’t know if I had imagined disappointment in it or not. “Yes, he was very good.” His hand brushed my bare shoulder as he reached past me to pick up the sparrow. His touch left a blaze of heat on that small patch of skin, and I wanted to rub it away but I didn’t. Couldn’t. I turned back to find him studying the small bird. He had a smile on his lips. “When I was eight, I went away to summer camp. I was nervous to sleep away from my family. There was a tree right outside my bedroom window, and sparrows would perch in it and sing. My dad carved this guy so I could bring one of the sparrows along. So I’d have a little piece of home with me—a little token of comfort.”