“You should go,” I tell her.
Her thin eyebrows arch. “What?”
“You should go,” I repeat as I step aside to give her a better view of the exit.
Carina frowns as she puts a hand on her hip. “You said you could go for a few more rounds.”
Did I?
“Maybe I can, but I don’t want to anymore,” I tell her.
Frankly, I suddenly feel tired.
She puts her other hand on her hip. The duvet falls to the floor.
“Sure?”
“Sure,” I answer without any hesitation even as I look at her naked body.
Carina sighs. “Fine.”
She starts to pick up her clothes, which are scattered all over the living room.
“My throat’s getting a little hoarse anyway, what with you constantly telling me to be louder.”
I say nothing. She puts on her underwear and her pants.
“Who was that banging on the door?”
I nearly grin as I remember the sight of Violet with that pan. She could have brought a rolling pin. Or a spatula. Or an umbrella. Instead, she brought a pan. Not that she needs a weapon, as she already proved last week. The memory of what she did with just her knee is still enough to make me wince.
“Just my neighbor,” I answer Carina’s question. “She thought I was wrestling with a burglar or something.”
Carina snorts before putting on her blouse. “Stupid. Didn’t she hear me moaning through the wall?”
I frown. It’s weird. I’ve said a lot of mean things to Violet without flinching, yet all Carina did was call her stupid and I feel like I’ve been hit in the balls once again.
I feel like throwing her out of my apartment, but I wait patiently by the door for her to finish getting fully clothed.
“Anyway, that was fun,” she says as she puts on her coat. “I had fun.”
No comment.
She slips her feet into her shoes. “So much fun that I wouldn’t mind doing it again.”
“You know I don’t do seconds,” I tell her. “I told you before we started.”
“Right.” She grabs her purse. “I usually don’t either, except this time, I—”
“No seconds, Carina,” I cut her off.
It doesn’t matter how good the sex is. When you sleep with a woman more than once, she starts to get ideas inside her head. The next thing you know, she’s threatening to kill you if you leave.
Carina nods slowly. “Fine.”
She walks towards the door but stops in front of me.
“It was a real pleasure spending time with you, Asher,” she whispers in my ear.
Then she puts her hand on my chest and plants a kiss on my cheek. She’s about to press her lips against mine, too, but I grab both her arms and push her away. Yes, I liked her enough to have sex with her, but now that the sex is over, I’m starting to find her annoying, especially since she’s obviously stalling her departure.
“Good night,” I tell her as I look into her eyes, trying to convey the message that I want her to leave so I don’t have to say it.
She smiles in understanding and walks out but stops just outside the door and turns around before I can close it.
“That woman, your neighbor,” Carina says. “You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”
My eyebrows furrow. What?
“I’m not,” I assure her.
She grins. “Really?”
Now she’s just unbearable.
“Goodbye, Carina.”
I close the door before she can come up with any more nonsense. Then I head to the bathroom to take a shower. As the drops of water crash down on my skin, I think of what Carina said.
Me? In love with Violet? How ever did she come up with that idea?
I’m not. I just want to have sex with her. That’s all. I just want to know how it would feel to have her bare body trembling against mine, to look into her cobalt blue eyes as I bury myself deep inside her, to hear my name leave her lips in a gasp. I just want her to let go of all her fears and inhibitions and feel good.
Why? Because I don’t think she understands what pleasure means. She’s too serious. She expects too much of herself. She’s too careful, too defensive. For once, I want her to take a chance. Take a leap. Break through her own walls and be reckless, fearless. I know she can. If only she could open her heart, she’d see that as well, but she’s blinded by doubts and fears. I know that feeling, too.
Violet may not see it, but we have a lot in common. We’re both stubborn to a fault. We’ve both been hardened by the years. We both hate showing any sign of weakness. I have no doubt we’d both be amazing in bed.
That doesn’t mean I intend on having sex with her for more than one night. More than one round, sure. More than one night, no. I’m not going to start a relationship with her. Like I said, I’m just after the sex, and once that’s done, I’ll leave her alone just like all the women I’ve slept with for the past several years. I’m never going near her again, not even if she comes to my door like she did earlier and wears that face, that face desperately trying to keep tears at bay as she threatened me with a pan. Fuck, I wanted to pull her into my arms then.
But only because I felt guilty. That’s all. I know I can be a jerk sometimes, but no one has impressed that fact upon me more than Violet. Maybe because no one brings that side of me out more than she does. She frustrates me. She makes me lose my temper. She makes me feel like a kid and makes me do stupid things. She drives me out of control. She…
I stop and let out a laugh that bounces off the tiles. What am I thinking? That Violet has control over me?
No. That’s absurd. No woman can control Asher Hawthorne.
Starting now, I’m going to act more like myself instead of reacting to Violet. I’m going to stop going out of my way to be mean to her. I’m going to stop trying to hurt her or make her leave. I’m going to stop asking, expecting things from her. I’ve grown tired of all of it anyway.
Ever since Violet arrived from Switzerland, I’ve been all about her. Trying to get her to sleep with me. Trying to annoy her. Enough.
No more plots. No more stupid arguments. No more games.
Starting tomorrow, Violet is going to see the real Asher Hawthorne.
~
“Good morning, Ms. Cleary,” I greet Violet as I put a cup of coffee on her desk before heading to my office.
She looks up at me with wide eyes. I smile.
“What’s this?” she asks as she glances at the cup of coffee.
“Cappuccino,” I answer. “With vanilla foam and a bit of cinnamon. I thought you might need it.”
Violet says nothing. I can tell from her expression that she’s trying to guess my intention. Am I genuinely being nice to her after being an ass last night? Or am I making fun of her?
“Don’t worry,” I tell her. “I didn’t put anything in it.”
I’d never do that, but I can understand why she’s reluctant to believe me after all the other things I’ve tried. It’s best to give her a few moments to make up her mind.
“Good day, Ms. Cleary.” I start to walk away from her desk. “Oh, and kindly give me a copy of the report on our estimated expenses for the next quarter this morning so I can take a look at it before the meeting with Ethan this afternoon. You can just hand it to Dylan and then I’ll have it sent back to you if there are any changes necessary.”