Viv let out a breath. “Oh thank heavens, because I was not looking forward to explaining it.” She cocked an eyebrow. “How is it that you know?”
Henry took the opportunity to make his presence known with a whine at Viv for her neglectfulness in not bringing him a bit of morsel from the kitchens.
“Oh, I see,” Viv murmured. She straightened her skirts and sat on the bench at the end of Eliza’s bed.
Viv looked tired. She’d looked tired a lot lately with faint bruises under her eyes and a wilting about her lips. Eliza wondered if she were still not sleeping well. It had been nearly two months since she had appeared on Andrew’s doorstep, trunks and maid in tow, declaring her intent to see her sisters properly wed. And not to some blackguard like she’d unfortunately married.
The Duke of Margate had seemed like a nice enough gentleman the few times Eliza had met him when he’d wed her sister nearly eighteen months prior. He carried butterscotches with him, and he always asked about her watercolors.
Such a shame he’d been caught abed with an opera singer from Covent Garden.
Eliza placed the last of her brushes in her painting kit and snapped it tightly shut for her maid, Lucy, to add to her things to be taken over to Ashbourne House that morning. She brushed at the skirts of her new gown, a periwinkle muslin Viv had insisted on. Eliza didn’t see what was wrong with any of her other muslin gowns, but apparently she needed something new for her wedding day.
Her stomach flipped at the thought, and she wrestled down her anxiety. Only a few more hours and she would be safely wed. Only a few more hours and her dream of starting a family could actually come to fruition.
It didn’t help. Her mind invariably strayed to that kiss. The way Ashbourne had held her with such ferocity as if he needed her to live, which was absurd because no one needed her. His kiss, so soft, so alluring, as if he knew not to frighten her.
But more than anything she could not forget the smell of sandalwood. She’d never been close enough to a man to understand the tantalizing qualities of his scent. The Duke of Ashbourne smelled wonderful. Oh drat, this was not at all helping to calm her nerves.
She settled on the bench next to Viv and took her sisters hands into her own.
“Have you heard from him, Viv?”
Her sister’s eyes went glassy and vacant, and Eliza squeezed her hands to bring her back.
“No.” The word was almost inaudible. Viv shook her head as if rousing herself. “No, I have not heard from him.”
“I’m sure it’s simply because he doesn’t know what to say.”
Viv’s eyes flashed. “Begging for forgiveness would be a good start.”
Eliza looked down at their hands. “I know I’m not experienced with marriage.” She looked up, met her sister’s gaze, and smiled awkwardly. “At least not yet. But I know some married couples have an understanding between them.”
Eliza didn’t say more for she didn’t need to.
“Ryder and I never discussed it,” Viv said softly. She seemed to hesitate, and it was strange for Eliza to see her older sister so unsure of herself.
Viv always seemed to arrive three meters ahead of herself, her confidence and vitality far preceding her. Now she twisted her wedding band around and around endlessly on her finger. She seemed to realize she was doing it and pressed her hands against her thigh.
“I realize it may have been foolish for me to assume fidelity from my husband. I can’t say it’s entirely common.”
Eliza’s mouth opened without a word coming forth as her sister’s comment sank in. She’d never considered if Ashbourne planned to be faithful. Her own loyalty was not in question as it was painfully obvious she would not be sought after for assignations.
But Ashbourne…Ashbourne would seek such comfort out. Of course, he would. Pain tightened her chest, and she rubbed a hand absently along her collarbone. It didn’t matter. It was probably for the best if he were happy and his needs fulfilled. Surely, other women would be capable—no, skilled at such things.
Eliza swallowed. “No, I’m afraid you’re right. But perhaps, he didn’t realize your expectations. A lot can be misunderstood between two people.”
Viv’s smile was just a touch watery. “When did my little sister get to be so wise?”
“At the same time you were getting to be so strong.” Eliza squeezed her sister’s hand and stood. “I think I’d best finish up here if we are to leave for the church on time.”
Viv rearranged her skirts as she stood. “Yes, I suppose. I’m rather surprised Ashbourne wished to wed by license.”
Eliza paused in placing her watercolors in the remaining trunk.
“He wishes to return to his summer home soon. Apparently, he doesn’t enjoy London in the summer.”
Viv watched her carefully. “I can’t say that I blame him. London can be dreadfully hot in the summer.” She cocked her head. “Still, a week is awfully short notice to wed. I’m surprised he hasn’t returned to the house in that time to meet with Andrew.”
Eliza swallowed, remembering her only meeting with Andrew to discuss the terms of her marriage. She hadn’t seen Ashbourne since that day in the drawing room. Embarrassment and guilt surged within her, and she tamped it down as best she could.
That kiss.
She’d nearly ruined everything with that kiss. He couldn’t even bear to look at her after it was through, and yet it had kept her awake every night since.
She forced the pain away as she was so good at doing.
“He sent his instructions along with his solicitor. Andrew assures me everything is in order.” She allowed a smile then to soothe her sister’s curiosity.
Viv returned her smile with one of her own and a softening of her gaze. She closed the distance between them and gave her a meaningful if slightly awkward hug. Eliza could not fathom why all the members of her family suddenly felt compelled to hug her.
Viv’s eyes were moist when she pulled back, and with a slight nod, she turned and left, softly closing the door behind her.
Eliza was once more alone with her trunks, her life packed into neat boxes ready for the next part of it. Her gaze inevitably drifted to Henry, perched on the sofa she’d had placed by the fire, so he’d have somewhere to lounge. She would need to make such arrangements in her new home, and with a jolt, she realized she’d never seen her new home. She wondered if any bride ever saw her future home before her wedding day.
She squeezed in on the sofa with Henry, who obligingly lifted his head to make room. He lolled against her hip and rested his head in her lap, so it really was no compromise. She scratched at his supple fur.
“My dear, Henry, what are we about to embark on?”
She felt the stirrings of fear and apprehension. After all, what she was about to do she’d never done before. She wasn’t a debutante like Viv had been. Viv had had scores of men interested in her. Eliza had spotted more than one surreptitious slip onto balconies and into hidden alcoves. Viv must have had a world of experience more than Eliza did at this very moment.
Even Louisa attracted her far amount of attention.
She scratched behind Henry’s ear.
“It needn’t matter, old friend. Soon we’ll be a family again.”
She pushed to her feet, determined to resume her packing. They were to stay in London for a few days at Ashbourne House before heading to the shore and Ashbourne Manor. She’d need to keep a trunk of the things she would require while the rest would be sent on to Glenhaven and Ashbourne Manor as the servants had been notified to open up the house.