Just as I’m fussing with my hair again and reaching for Jared’s aftershave, Amy walks in.
“Um, ever heard of knocking?” I joke, chuckling.
“This is my bedroom!” she scoffs before raising one eyebrow. “Does he know you’re borrowing that?”
I shrug one shoulder, uncaring. “He always knows. He just has the sense not to bother trying to stop me anymore.”
Amy playfully tsks her tongue. “You’ll be thirty next month, Theo. You really should buy your own.” She crosses the room, walking over to her dressing table. She picks up her bangles, sliding them on as we make eye contact in the mirror.
“Nah. Why buy my own tailored suits when I can wear my body double’s?” I reply. “Plus, I only need them for one day every two weeks when I meet my publisher. It’s not like I need them every day like he does. He has so damn many; he doesn’t even miss them anyway.” I gesture at the rack of my twin brother’s expensive designer suits in example. “Means I’ll be able to borrow this for my meeting Monday, too, and then he can have it back.” I throw her a disarming, hopefully charming smile.
She chuckles and shrugs in response, reaching for a pair of diamond stud earrings, carefully putting them in. She knows what I’m like. I don’t know why we’re bothering to have this conversation.
“If you wear it tonight to go out in, won’t it smell of stale beer, doner kebab, and shame come Monday?”
I turn to her and offer a winning grin. “I’ll Febreze it.”
She rolls her eyes and picks up her handbag, shoving a tube of lip gloss and some mints inside. Without my permission, my eyes glide over her as she bends to tie up her ankle-high silver Converse. She’s wearing black shorts that come to the top of her thighs with a pair of black tights underneath, which have some sort of shimmery silver thread in them, and a fitted pink T-shirt with a V-neck that makes my upper lip sweaty. I force my hands into my pockets and blink, trying to control my attraction to her before tearing my eyes from her arse.
Bad, Theo. Bad.
“What time is Jared due back from his conference?” I ask.
She straightens and pushes her curls behind one ear. “Any minute now.”
As if on cue, the front door opens and closes, and a grin stretches across Amy’s face as we hear Jared’s voice float in from the living room. The squeal of delight that leaves Amy’s mouth feels like a punch in the dick.
She darts from the room, and I follow slowly behind, watching as my mirror image drops his overnight bag and turns towards her; his grin matches hers as she leaps into his arms without giving him time to compose himself.
Jared staggers back half a step as he catches her and laughs, his lips immediately crashing against hers. Her legs are around his waist, arms tight around his neck; one of his hands is on her arse, and the other is fisted in her hair while they practically devour each other as if they hadn’t seen each other in months instead of just the one damn day Jared had to go on a course for.
There are figurative sparks. Their lust hangs in the air like a silent fart that everybody smells and finds distasteful but is too polite to acknowledge.
Lucky bastard.
I lean against the doorframe and watch them, my mind whirring. The thing is, as much as I’m crazy about Amy, deep down, I know she’s better off with him. She and I never would have lasted. If we’d got together at the start, she’s right; she would have fallen for Jared regardless. They’re inevitable.
They’re perfect for each other. He completes her, and I’ve never seen my twin happier than when he’s with her. When he smiles down at her and his eyes twinkle with joy, I can’t even begrudge him having her. Jared is great, an amazing brother and my best friend. He’s a thoroughly decent bloke, and I would do anything for him. He deserves her and to be as happy as she makes him.
But knowing all that doesn’t douse my jealousy in the slightest. All my life, I’ve never been envious of Jared for anything, not the high-paying job he has or the flashy car, not the expensive suits or the nice apartment, or the fact that it seems he was born with his shit together. Nope. I’ve never coveted anything my brother has … until her.
Tim rolls his eyes before pretending to stick his finger down his throat and gag. “You know, people pay good money to watch this kind of stuff online.”
“If you’re paying for it, you’re looking in the wrong places. Plenty of freebies out there if you know where to look. I can hook you up with some links if you need it,” I reply, winking at him as I head to the kitchen and help myself to another beer.
Tim laughs, his hand sliding across Heather’s back as he sends me a knowing grin. “We don’t need it. Thanks though.”
“Smug git.” I roll my eyes.
Jared and Amy are having a quiet conversation with their foreheads pressed together, staring into each other’s eyes. She’s still attached to his front like a new appendage.
I flop down on the sofa and pretend to watch TV. “How’s work going?” I ask Tim as Amy finally detaches herself from my brother.
Jared slaps me on the shoulder in greeting. “I’ll be five minutes; I just need to change, and then we can go meet everyone else.”
I nod in acknowledgement.
Tim blows out a big breath. “Man, work’s busy. I can’t wait for next weekend, so I can have a whole weekend off! It’s gonna be lit!”
Heather laughs. “Lit? Are you trying to pretend to be younger than you are again?”
I grin. “Is there something happening next weekend?”
A sharp slap to the back of my head makes me wince and chuckle at the same time.
“Only the wedding of the century,” Amy chirps excitedly, grinning at the thought of her impending nuptials.
“Oh, is that all?” As if I could really forget!
Secretly, I’m dreading it. My grand master plan is to get drunk—so drunk that I can look back in years to come and not remember a bloody second of it.
“You have a plus-one, by the way. You said you’d be bringing someone,” Amy continues, sternly looking at me.
I roll my eyes. “I will. I’m not a savage.”
“Well, do we get to know her name yet or what? We need it for table plans and name cards.” She leans over and grabs the bowl of peanuts from the coffee table, taking a handful and stuffing them in her mouth before offering the dish to me.
I shrug and reach out, taking a handful too. “Not likely. I don’t know her name yet. I’ll let you know when I do.” I shoot her a grin.
“You’re such a dog!” Heather jokes, laughing, sticking her tongue out at me.
I laugh good-naturedly.
I’m not a dog though. I’m just not a monk either. Despite being trapped in my one-sided, unrequited, awkward crush scenario, I still date. Hell, I’m a guy. If I’m not thinking about work, football, or food, I’m thinking about sex. I still have needs, and sometimes, my right hand just doesn’t cut it. I’ll be honest; I’m always on the lookout for someone to blow my mind, someone to take my mind off Amy and make me feel less shitty inside. So far though … bupkis. I haven’t found anyone who holds my attention for longer than a few dates.
“I can set you up with someone if you want,” Tim offers, sipping at his beer. “There are a couple of cute nurses I work with I could introduce you to.” He flinches as his wife reaches over and tweaks his nipple through his shirt. “Ouch, babe. What was that for?” he asks her, wincing as he rubs at his chest.