Anyone who has ever tried to plan anything near Jared and has had him take over everything knows the reason. He’s basically an evil dictator in disguise, a stickler for details. I’d hate to work for him; in fact, if he were my boss, I’d secretly put laxatives in his morning coffee and rub his favourite pen across my nutsack at every given opportunity. His superiors probably love him though; he’s the type of dependable, proactive, hardworking perfectionist who bosses jizz their pants over.
“Poor Jared.” Lucie pouts and frowns.
“He’ll get over it. He likely gives exactly zero shits what they think of him.”
She nods, picking at her pizza. “You know, when you texted me the itinerary for the weekend, I was wondering why on earth someone would choose a fancy-dress theme for a party. But now that I’ve met Amy, I get it. It makes total sense.”
I grin and nod. “Right?”
Lucie’s lips purse as she looks up at me. “She’s so great. I can see why you like her.”
My breath catches, and I clear my throat awkwardly. “Er … yeah.”
“So, what are you going as tonight?” She inquisitively eyes my cardboard box. “Can I see?”
I nod and wipe my fingers, pushing my empty plate onto the side as I pull the box closer to me and peel off the tape. Lucie leans over, and we both peer in at the vibrant green, blue, and red inside the box. When she doesn’t get it, I stand and pull the outfit from the box, holding it up against my body.
As she realises what it is, she bursts out laughing. “Oh my God, that’s bloody brilliant! I love it.”
I look down at the outfit and grin. It took me forever to choose what I wanted. After six weekends of trudging around all the cosplay shops I could find within driving distance (and several failed online orders that were subpar), I finally found the perfect outfit. It’s Mario riding Yoshi. The top half of my body is Mario’s red T-shirt and blue dungarees. There are fake padded Mario legs that start at my hips. Then, around my middle, there is a large stuffed Yoshi head and body, complete with big, wide eyes and tiny, padded arms. Mario’s fake legs hang over Yoshi’s sides, so it looks like he’s riding him. My legs are green and are supposed to be Yoshi’s. I even have Mario’s hat and a fake moustache to complete the outfit. It’s pretty damn genius, even if I do say so myself.
Folding it up carefully, I put it back in the box and cock my head. “Let’s see yours. Who are you going as?”
“Uh, no, you can have a surprise.”
I shrug in acceptance. I like surprises. I can wait. Silently, I wish we’d conferred and gone as a couple, maybe Bonnie and Clyde, or Han Solo and Leia; that would have been amazing.
“Fair enough. Were you running around, frantic to find a hire shop after I texted you Monday night with the itinerary?” I wince apologetically.
I definitely sprang it on her and purposefully didn’t tell her until after she agreed and I booked her flight. Less chance of back-outs then!
She shakes her head. “Actually, no. Surprisingly, I already had a costume. For my twenty-first birthday, I had a girls’ night, fancy-dress-themed bar crawl. I only wore it the once and then leant it to my best friend, Aubrey, for her work’s Halloween party one year. She just kept it at her place after that because I had no use for it. Luckily, it was hanging in the back of her wardrobe. I just hope it still fits.” She winces and looks down at her body. “Maybe I should have tried it on before bringing it. I’ve, um, filled out a little since I was twenty-one. That’s probably the politest way of saying that my tits and arse are bigger now.”
At the casual mention of them, I fight with everything in me not to let my eyes drop down to said tits and arse. “And likely better …”
She chuckles and shrugs one shoulder. “Well, you’re a man, so obviously, you think that. All men like a bit of T and A.”
“Solid fact.” I nod in agreement and hold up a hand for a high five.
Her blush is adorable as she slaps her palm against mine. “I should really start getting ready. Do you need help packing up your stuff? If not, I’m going to hop in the shower.” She stands and scrunches up her napkin, pushing her plate onto the side as she looks at me hopefully.
“You go in the shower. I’ll pack up and then head next door to my room. I’ll call back for you at seven thirty, and we’ll go downstairs to the function room.”
She nods and throws me a smile as she heads into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.
It takes me less than a couple of minutes to gather my stuff and leave her in peace. Once in my room next door, I flop on the bed and flick on the TV. There’s still a little over an hour left to go before we’re due to meet up. It won’t take me long to get ready. I’m going to forgo the shave again—screw it, stubble is on trend right now. I’ll fix it tomorrow before the wedding. Basically, just a shower and change of clothes—twenty minutes, tops.
Sometimes, I love being a man.
My outfit is epic. I’m grinning like a moron as I look at myself in the full-length mirror. It was worth the hours of searching to find the perfect costume. Mine is undoubtedly going to be the best costume of the night. I might even get a prize. Hopefully, Amy’s doing prizes.
At precisely seven thirty, I’m so excited to see what Lucie’s wearing that I practically skip to her door and knock.
“Theo, I’m not quite ready!” she calls from inside. “I don’t want to make you late to the party. Shall I meet you down there in a few minutes?”
I frown at the door. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah. It’s just taking me longer than I thought to get ready. I’m sorry. I won’t be long though. You go and get us a round in, and I’ll see you in a bit.”
I step closer to the door in case people can hear me and close my eyes. “Luce, you’re not going to stand me up, are you? The deal we made was for the Friday night party and the wedding …” I hold my breath and wait.
Screw the deal. I just want to spend some more time with her. If she doesn’t come tonight, I’ll be gutted. The more time I spend with her, the more I like her.
I hear her laugh before she calls back, “I remember the deal, Theo. I’ll be there in a few, I promise. I’m just finishing up with my hair. I’m almost done. Ten minutes, tops. I’ll see you down there.”
Happier now after her reassurances, I smile and step back, brushing a piece of lint from Yoshi’s stuffed head. “Okay. See you in a bit then.”
As I’m about to step into the lift, I remember I didn’t pick up my phone. I left it on charge in my room. I quickly head back to get it, spending an extra couple of minutes to add some more glue to doubly secure my fake moustache to avoid any embarrassing costume mishaps.
The hallway is deserted as I walk down it and get into the lift—the lobby isn’t though. As I step out of the lift in my costume, people stop and stare, smiling, laughing, and pointing me out to their friends. I grin proudly when a stroppy-looking teenager lifts his head from his phone and takes a picture of me. The receptionist’s eyes follow my every move, her mouth hanging open. Clearly, I’m the best dressed so far. My chest puffs out smugly.