Everything in me screamed to take the easy way out. I didn’t want to see Serafina again, especially not now that I knew she carried Remo Falcone’s child. Yet, my pride was in tatters and I wouldn’t allow anyone to stomp it to the ground completely, especially not Remo Falcone. “I don’t see why I should. Serafina is no longer my concern. Sofia is my fiancée now.” Even I could hear the lingering bitterness in my voice.
Pietro cleared his throat. “Very well. See you then.”
For a long time after I ended the call, I stared at nothing.
The whirr of the wheelchair announced Emma’s appearance. I schooled my features into an expression of calm when she appeared in the doorframe.
“Are you okay?” she asked, her too-attentive eyes taking in my face. Emma knew me too well, and she was simply too good at reading other people’s emotions.
“I’m fine,” I pressed out. She was too young to be weighed down by my problems. Besides, she had her own issues to conquer.
She bit her lip. “Okay.”
Forcing a smile, I walked over to her and squeezed her shoulder. “I’m leaving tomorrow morning.”
“I’ll be with Mom and Dad then, right?”
I nodded, but then an idea struck me. “Why don’t you come along? I’m in need of company.”
Her entire face transformed into pure joy and surprise. “Really? Won’t I be a bother?”
I squatted in front of her and gripped her knees. “You aren’t a bother, Emma.”
Having Emma with me in Chicago would certainly hold me back, which was exactly why I needed Emma there with me. I rarely lost my shit when she was around. I wanted to protect her from that side of me, and I really needed someone to stop me from losing my shit. Seeing Serafina again might very well make me lose it altogether.
After dinner, I called my father to inform him that he and Mother wouldn’t have to take care of Emma in the next few days.
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Father asked. He sounded weaker than last time I’d talked to him, as if he could barely take in enough breath to press out a single word.
“Emma needs to be among people.”
“You know how people always stare at her.”
“I know, but I don’t give a fuck. Let them stare.”
The moment Emma and I entered the Cavallaro mansion through the back entrance—because that one was wheelchair accessible—and stepped into the lobby, people’s attention shifted toward us. It was difficult to determine who of us was the center of their open curiosity—Emma in her wheelchair or myself. Dante and his wife Valentina headed toward us and I shook their hands. After that, Emma and I moved into the living area where most of the guests had gathered.
Emma gave me an embarrassed smile. “People are staring.”
“They’re staring at me. The abandoned bridegroom,” I said in a forced joking voice.
Emma’s eyes widened. Luckily, Dante’s daughter, Anna, and Sofia were heading our way. Sofia gave me a bright smile. Her cheeks turned red when I smiled back at her.
“Hi,” she said. She smoothed out her dress and bit her lip, appearing almost as if she were waiting for something. Emma and Dante’s daughter hugged and picked up a conversation while I was left to stare at Sofia’s expectant face.
“How are you?” Sofia asked, then flushed an even deeper red.
I frowned, wondering where she was going with this. “I’m fine.” My tone was clipped. Then my eyes landed on her. Serafina entered the room with Samuel, their arms linked. She was dressed in an elegant, loose-fitting dress. My gaze lingered on her midriff, looking for the bump that her choice of clothing managed to conceal. Soon, that would be impossible, and everyone would know that Remo Falcone had managed to humiliate me and the Outfit in another way. It would be the scandal of the century.
The expectant, curious looks from everyone around me would only amplify then.
Serafina glanced my way, and our eyes met. She smiled politely, then looked away, moving on with her gaze like she had done with her life. Like so often in the last few weeks, anger surged inside me. It was unreasonable to blame Serafina for any of this. She was the victim. She’d suffered for all our sins and would continue to do so.
After a moment, I realized Sofia was watching me. I gave her another quick smile, then turned to Emma. “I’ll grab drinks and something to eat. You’ve got company now?” The last was addressed to Sofia and Anna. Both girls nodded.
Without another word, I walked away in search of the open bar. After a drink of Scotch, I felt more at ease. Still, I kept searching the room for Serafina. My brain just couldn’t let it rest. Frustrated at myself, I went in search of Pietro or Samuel. A cursory glance told me Emma was still talking to Anna and Sofia.
When I finally found Pietro, he was standing on the terrace in the winter cold, talking to Dante.
“Am I interrupting anything?” I asked as I joined them.
“No, come join us,” Dante said. The worry of the last few months that had settled in every line on my face also showed on his.
“When are you going to make it public?” I didn’t have to elaborate what I meant.
Pietro and Dante exchanged a look, then Pietro sighed. He took another sip from his drink. “We’ll try to keep it a secret for as long as possible. But I doubt we can cover it up for more than two more months. People will get suspicious if Serafina stays away from social events.”
“Why didn’t she get an abortion? Did she find out too late?”
“She didn’t want an abortion,” Pietro said. His voice made it clear that his choice would have been different if it had been up to him.
“But she’s going to give it away for someone else to raise?”
Dante shook his head, and Pietro emptied the rest of his glass then lit a cigarette. For a moment, I considered asking him for a smoke. I felt like getting drunk and smoking until I forgot everything around me. But neither was an option. I needed to stay sober enough to get Emma back to the hotel, and she didn’t like it when I smoked because it had killed our grandfather and would soon kill Father.
“She’s going to raise Falcone’s child?”
I didn’t get a reply. I couldn’t understand how Serafina could even consider raising his child. That she didn’t want an abortion was something I could comprehend. But actually watching Remo’s child grow up after what he did? That was insanity. Women got sentimental when they were pregnant. Maybe she’d change her mind later.
It shouldn’t even matter to me. Serafina wasn’t my business anymore. And yet, it still felt as if she were, as if everything that had happened to her would still fall back on me.
It was a prideful thing to consider, but I was unable to abandon the thought.
I’d been so excited when I’d heard that Danilo would be coming to Uncle Dante’s Christmas party. When he hadn’t attended Dad’s birthday party, I’d been disappointed. I wanted to see him again now that he was mine. Few people knew about our engagement yet—which wasn’t even an official engagement. That party would only happen when I was older.
My excitement faded when I met Danilo at the party. I’d taken longer than ever before to get ready. I’d chosen a new elegant dress, and I’d even put on a hint of makeup I’d snuck out of Fina’s room. Despite my efforts, Danilo hardly looked at me. It was as if I were air. His expression was passive. The only time there was a flicker of passion was when he spotted Serafina across the room. After that, I was invisible to him. Anna nudged me once he left.